What Well, that s a relief! I thought you d meant he d vanished. So how is he missing
It was just a figure of speech, Mama. Kit had been wondering for a while how much detail he should givehis parents about his wizardry. Now it occurred to him that he should have been giving them a lot more, if only to keep them from worrying. When the wizardry first comes to you, it doesn t come all at once. You get a test first:your Ordeal. If you pass, you re a wizard. If you don t
Immediately, the look on his mother s face suggested to him that he might havemisstepped . Youdie his mother said.
Not always, Kit said. Sometimes you just lose the power that was given you to take the test with. His mama was looking at him rather narrowly now, and Kit realized that she would immediately detect any attempt to soften this. But it s true that some kids don t come back, Kit said. Some disappearances are failed Ordeals.Maybe a few percent.
His mother sat, quietly digesting that, and had another drink of her coffee. So this Ordeal, she said. He s having some kind of problem with it
He s been in the middle of it for a long time, Kit said. He may need help. And I can t help thinking the autism has something to do with it. He sighed. I ve been doing a lot of reading, but I don t know anything about what s going on in his head yet. And he may not be able to tell me. I think I m going to have to get in there and take a look myself.
In hishead His mother looked alarmed. Kit, my love, I don t claim to understand the details of what you re doing but wouldn t that be a violation of his privacy
Maybe, Kit said. But couldn t you make a case that CPR is, too Still, you do it.
To save a life, yes.
That s what this might be, Kit said. Ordeals are crucial by definition, Mama. I had some help on mine. Maybe now I get to pay those favors forward.
So you get inside his head how, exactly his mama said. Is this whatCarmela keeps describing as magic telepathy
Kit shook his head. It s more complicated, he said. I m still working out how to describe it.Ponch sees it as making a new world to go to or finding that world ready-made. Once you make it, or find it, you go there.
Ponchsees it His mother shook her head, sloshed the coffee around in her cup, drank some, and made a face: It was going cold.
We ll go there and look around, Kit said. We ll see what his world looks like to him. Assuming we can get in all right.If that doesn t work I ll have to think of something else. But at least this is a place to start.
His mother put the cup down and pushed it away. If you do actually get to talk to him, she said, looking thoughtful, there s possibly something you should keep in mind. Autistic people have trouble, sometimes, predicting what other human beings minds are going to do. It s a skill they have to develop with practice, whereas we take it almost completely for granted, that prediction inside: If I do this, then she ll do that, and so on. So you have to be prepared for the things you say to really upset him, more than would seem reasonable. He may even have trouble believing in you.
Kit looked at her, wondering what she meant. It s not that he d think he washallucinating you, exactly, his mama said. This isn t that kind of perceptual problem. But some autistic people have trouble conceiving of anything existing outside the workings of their own minds. The concept of the other seems to take a long time forming. That s part of why so many of them can t make or keep eye contact with other people. Yet for the same reason, a lot of them seem not to know what fear is.
Weird, Kit said.
Not as such, said his mother. Different, yes. You may not scare him, but you may upset him so be ready for that.
Okay, Kit said.
His mother sat back and looked sad. The problem is that there are probably as many kinds of autism as there are people who have it, she said. And not enough of them come back from that side of things to tell us how what s happened to them looks or feels. She shook her head. Some of the few who have say that the world just got too overwhelming to be borne. They felt like they were surrounded by sounds that were too intense, sights they couldn t bear to see. So they had to withdraw inside themselves to getaway, or even hurt themselves over and over again as a way to blot out the pain outside. It s the only way they can control it. Others tell about feeling so sealed away from the world and the things and people in it that they hurt themselves just to beable to feel something. You get kids who are autistic from age two, and others who re perfectly normal until suddenly they turn ten or twelve and something just goes wrong and they turn inward and don t come out again for years.If ever. Kit s mama looked haunted.
Kit nodded slowly. I didn t know it was this complicated.
It is.
You know anything that would be good for me to read
There are lots of books, his mother said. Some of the ones in the hospital library are going to be too technical for you. She looked over Kit s shoulder at the books spread out on the floor. But some won t be, and they re more recent than these. Let me see what I can bring you.
Great. One thing, though. I really need to take tomorrow off to work on this. Can you call school and get me off
She scowled at him. You don t have a test or anything tomorrow
Huh No.
I m not going to make a habit of this
I m not asking you to, Mama! But it s going to take more than just lunch hour to make a start on this, and I don t want to have to run off all of a sudden in the middle of something that s going to make a difference.
His mother sat thinking. All right, she said. I ll take care of it. You can have a stomach bug or something.
No, Mama! Don t lie to them. Just tell them I need a personal day.
She gave him a slightly approving look. Okay.
Thanks, Mama. You re the best. He got up and kissed her, and took her coffee cup. You want some more
Yes. His mother leaned back on the sofa. Two sugars. And then I want you to explain to me why I can hear the DVD player and the remote yelling at each other in Japanese in the middle of the night.
Kit shut his eyes briefly in horror, and went to get the coffee.
Pursuits
Quite early the next morning, Kit came downstairs to find his sister sitting in front of the TV with a plate of half-finished toast, and a most peculiar expression on her face. Brother dear Carmela said.
This tone of voice usually meant that something bad was going to happen.And I haven t even had my cornflakes yet , Kit thought. What
I need to talk to you about the TV.
Uh what about it He went into the kitchen to make a start at least on the cornflakes, before she really got rolling.
Why did Pop tell me not to watch it
Uh, Kit said, maybe I should ask you first if Pop told you not to watch it, then what re you doing
If he hoped that taking the offensive with his sister would help him even a little, the hope was misplaced. Whydo what they say until you can figure out why
Carmelasaid from the living room. And with Pop at work and Mama asleep, there s no way I m going to find out thewhys fromthem for hours. So I ask you, instead while having a look myself.
Kit said nothing, just rummaged enthusiastically in the fridge for the milk.
Most of the shows don t make much sense, Carmela said. And a lot of others are in weird languages. This has to do with all the yelling in Japanese the other day, am I right
To a certain extent, Kit said, getting a bowl out of the cupboard and then opening a drawer for a spoon.
His sister sighed. You know, she said, you re bad at covering your tracks when you ve busted something. Hey, that s a local phone number!
Kit s eyes widened with shock. He hurried in to find his sister goggling at a screen full of billowing white smoke and a number with a 516 area code both of which, to his vast relief, then dissolved intowhangy guitar music and an offer for cut-rate Elvis CDs.