Kira sat motionless on the bed with her knees pulled up-her arms wrapped tightly around them. She took no pleasure in the morning light that filled the room after Ussay pulled the black pieces of fabric from the windows. When Ussay asked to see her foot, Kira slowly pushed it out from under the hem of her dress.
“Does it still hurt?” Ussay asked.
“No,” Kira lied.
Ussay tried to brush a strand of hair away from Kira’s face, but she turned her head to avoid being touched. “They are gone now. It is safe.”
Kira closed her eyes, but a tear still escaped from beneath her lashes. How could she live like this? How could anyone live like this? After all the warnings Octavion gave her, and everything she’d witnessed, she had no idea the magnitude of danger that existed in his world. She’d told him she wasn’t afraid of him, but now. . now she wasn’t so sure. How could she love a man capable of such violence? She opened her eyes and turned to face Ussay.
“It was Octavion outside, wasn’t it?”
“I believe so,” Ussay said. “But not the Octavion you know and trust. You need to understand that.”
“What do you mean?”
“Do you think he would choose to be that way? He would give anything to be rid of the curse-most Royals would. But he cannot. It is his heritage. It runs through his veins like the river runs down from the mountain. He has been away from our world for so long that it is dammed up inside him. With every new phase of our moons, the dam is broken and there is no stopping the force of it as it destroys everything in its path.”
“I guess I never thought of it that way. He seemed to have so much more control before.” Kira wiped at her tears and dried her hand on her dress.
“He was just as taken aback as you were. The night he brought. . his sister home, he had no warning of the moons’ powers or how they would affect him. He no more than got her in the arms of his father when he lost complete control. He had no idea what he was doing and went straight for the village. We were easy prey. If Luka would have been an instant later, a man would have died.”
“He almost killed a man?” Kira was horrified.
Ussay nodded. “When he calmed down enough to remember what he had done, he ordered the chains installed in his lair. He made his family promise to keep him restrained until everyone had returned to their homes. Luka is supposed to hunt with him now to make sure he stays away from the village. I do not know why he would let him get so close.”
“Is that why he didn’t come back last night?” Kira asked. “And why you didn’t return with food?”
“Yes. When I saw the fire in his eyes and how close he came to lashing out at me, I realized the change was upon him. He hated himself for what he did to me. A tiny scratch and it almost tore him in two. I followed him to his lair and found him tearing the place apart. I retreated back up the staircase, but he heard me. He begged me to lock him up. He was afraid he would be tempted to return to you and that he would lose control.”
“You’re the one who put him in chains?”
“Yes.” Ussay looked at her hands, clearly upset about doing something so against her kind nature. “He made me promise to leave the castle and sent Luka to take you to safety. I am sorry he frightened you.” She raised her eyes to meet Kira’s. “Can you forgive me?”
Kira placed her hand on Ussay’s shoulder. “There’s nothing to forgive. I’m glad you let me stay here.” A rumbling noise in Kira’s stomach made them both smile. “I didn’t eat last night. I don’t suppose you have something I could snack on before we return to the castle?”
Ussay’s big, brown eyes widened. “Kira, we cannot go back-not yet.”
“But why not? I thought they only craved at night.”
“They crave constantly around this time, but it is stronger at night. They usually rest during the day. You do not want to make any noises in the castle and wake one of them. Last night was not the worst of it, either. Tonight, both moons will be new and we will need to be ready. I will check outside to make sure no sign was left. We may have to spread your scent to throw Octavion or any other Royal off the smell of your blood.”
“He wouldn’t hurt me, Ussay. I know that.”
Ussay shook her head. “Forgive me for being so blunt, but. . thoughts like that will get you killed. When he is hunting, all he sees is something to satisfy his hunger. He will not recognize you or even care.”
“How do you know so much?” Kira knew Ussay believed her words to be true, but deep down Kira refused to let go of the possibility that Octavion couldn’t bring himself to hurt her. Not like that.
“I told you. I practically grew up in the castle. I listened and learned. I probably know more than any other commoner in the village, but keep most of it to myself. I do not want what happened to my mother to happen to me.” Ussay motioned to the empty chair sitting by the table. Kira barely remembered her aunt at the door earlier that morning offering to take Narissa to the market.
“What do you mean? What happened to your mother?”
“I am not certain, exactly. One day my aunt came to the castle to fetch me and bring me home because my mother had taken ill. The king would not allow us to see her for several days because she was contagious-or so they said. When they finally brought her to us, she had no memory of working at the castle. She has never been the same.”
Lydia and Shandira’s nursemaid. Kira remembered the story Lydia told her about how the woman had seen her change into her kindred spirit to fight off Shandira. Ussay was right. Her mother had seen something that night-something the king didn’t want anyone else to know about. “Did she work with the children in the castle?”
Ussay looked at Kira curiously. “How did you know?”
Kira shrugged. “A guess.”
“Yes, she did. I would have thought nothing of it, but then the same thing happened to Serena, the weaver’s daughter. Even to this day, she is not the same. She was at the castle one night-”
“Wait.” Kira’s stomach gave a little twist and she suddenly felt like throwing up. “What did you say?”
“I said it happened to the weaver’s daughter. Kira, are you all right? The color just drained from your face.” Ussay slid off the bed and reached for the basin her mother used the night before to burn the bandages. She held it out for Kira to take. She pushed it away.
“I’m fine. I’m not sure I heard you right, though. Who is the weaver’s daughter?”
“Serena. Do you know her?”
“No, but I’ve heard Lydia speak about a Serena. Did she go to the ball. . the night the queen was killed?” Kira’s stomach rose into her throat. She didn’t want to hear this.
“Yes. Octavion was her escort.”
Kira’s heart leapt in her chest and a sharp pain shot down into her stomach. “No,” she managed, before reaching around Ussay for the basin and heaving what little was in her stomach into the bowl.
“How can you be sick? You have not eaten.” Ussay ran to the cupboard and brought back a towel.
“I don’t know.” How can she be alive? Did Lydia and Octavion lie to me? Or were they deceived by their father? And what about the Crystor? If Serena isn’t dead, how was the bracelet removed from her wrist without her and Lydia dying? And then another question popped into her head-if Lydia was dead, why hadn’t the Crystor fallen off? Of course, maybe that had more to do with still being bound to Altaria. Kira held her head in her hands while confusion stuffed it full of questions.
Kira wiped her face and handed the basin to Ussay. “Sorry. I don’t know what came over me. Maybe I need to eat something.”
“I am so sorry. I keep promising you food and then forgetting.” Ussay went to a box on the mantle and pulled out a small chunk of bread. She put it on a plate from the cupboard and handed it to Kira. “My mother spends the day with my aunt and I am always at the castle. I am afraid we do not keep much food here. I will be right back.”
As soon as the door closed behind Ussay, Kira put the plate of bread on the table next to the bed, laid her head on the pillow and curled into a ball. Serena was alive. The thought terrified her. If his father lied to him, Octavion would be furious. She didn’t want to think about what it would mean for her if Octavion discovered the girl he once loved and meant to marry was still alive.
As Kira lay there, staring at the empty fireplace, an image came to her mind. It was of the first time she’d seen Toran, her back against the boulder near Octavion’s lair on the mountain. A huge white tiger advanced toward her, growling and snarling. She felt the warmth of his breath on her face and closed her eyes.
In the distance she heard Octavion call her name. She opened her eyes but now she saw herself in the village, her back pressed to the rock wall of a cottage. In Toran’s place stood Octavion, fully transformed, his sharp teeth visible through his vicious snarl. He looked at her with hunger in his eyes and then leaned toward her, his breath rushing down her neck. A deep rumbling sound escaped his chest.
“I know you can’t hurt me. It’s not in you.” Her shaky voice formed the words in a whisper.
A confused look crossed his beastly face when he looked into her eyes, then he simply disappeared.
When Ussay came through the door with a bowl of fruit and a loaf of bread, Kira’s sense of survival and determination had been renewed. She didn’t care what Ussay said. She knew in her heart Octavion would never hurt her. She’d seen it with her own eyes-felt it in her heart. And as far as Serena was concerned-well, she’d jump off that bridge when she got to it.
Kira swung her feet over the edge of the bed and stood. The pressure on her foot caused a little pain, but as she rolled her foot to the outside edge, it lessened. She could walk. Ussay protested, but Kira insisted on helping prepare their meal. Kira sat at the table and looked through her selection of fruit while Ussay pulled a small bench from near the fireplace and joined her.
“So, tell me what needs to be done for tonight?” Kira didn’t intend to be the victim in all this. If this was how she lived the rest of her life, she needed to learn how to protect herself. Octavion wasn’t the only one she had to worry about. There were other Royals out there.
“I will take care of it,” Ussay said. “You can stay here and relax.”
“Are you insane? I’m sick of being cooped up and staying in bed all day. I want to help. You said we’d have to spread my scent, would it be easier if I walked around outside?”
“But your foot. I-”
Kira’s glare cut her off.
“Well, if you insist. Yes, walking around would help. I need to take the Sevrin with us as well. It’s important to spread them both so it appears we tried to hide the scent. I’ve asked a few of the women at the market to do the same.”
Kira almost forgot about the screams that rang out through the village during the night. “Did he-was anyone hurt last night? I heard screaming.”
“I do not believe so. Some think the screaming will scare off the Royals, but they are foolish. There is also a sensitive on the other side of the village who senses when they are about to appear. She claims to feel their spirit arrive long before their physical bodies do. Sometimes she will scream to warn others. I am skeptical. Everyone has their own way of dealing with it, but after years of being in the castle, I know complete silence is best.”
Kira brushed a few breadcrumbs from her dress. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course.”
Kira hesitated, trying to find the right words. She didn’t want to offend Ussay or get her into trouble, but she needed the truth. “I need to know about. .” She paused for a moment before whispering her name. “Lydia.”
Ussay gasped. “I cannot-”
“Wait.” Kira reached across the table and patted Ussay’s hand. “I know you said talking about her is forbidden and I don’t want to get you in trouble, but. . maybe there’s a way you can tell me without speaking her name. I need to know what happened. She was my friend and we shared a special connection.”
Ussay pulled her hand out from under Kira’s and stood. She went to the fireplace, keeping her back to Kira. “I could lose my station in the castle.”
“No. I won’t tell anyone, not even Octavion. I swear it.” Kira stood and joined Ussay in front of the cold hearth. She placed a gentle hand on the girl’s shoulder. “Please.”
Ussay was quiet for a long moment before she finally spoke. “All I can tell you is. . there is a fresh grave in the Royal cemetery.”
Kira dropped her hand to her side and went back to the table to sit. She fingered the Crystor, spinning it around her wrist. “When?”
“Um. . I do not-”
“Please. I need to know.”
Ussay joined Kira at the table, her eyes brimming with tears. “I was summoned to the castle to attend to your needs the same day she passed.”
Kira’s hand flew to her mouth and the beat of her heart increased, causing her chest to ache. She knew Altaria listened. She always listened. “She died the same day I came here?”
Wiping the tears from her eyes, Ussay said, “At sunset, the night before.”
I could have saved her.
“I am sorry, Kira. I know how difficult it is to lose a friend.”
“Thanks for telling me. I won’t say anything. It makes all this much easier, knowing I have someone to talk to. Knowing I have a friend.”
Ussay paused for a moment, a bewildered look on her face. “You would consider a commoner a friend?”
Kira smiled through her tears. “I’m a commoner. There’s not a drop of Royal blood running through my veins.” Well, except Octavion’s.
“Kira, I am honored to call you my friend.”
“I’m glad. I need one right now.” They both wiped their tears again and continued with their breakfast. Somehow, most of the food Ussay retrieved from the village had been eaten. Kira sat back in the chair and rubbed her stomach.
“Ugh. I ate too much. I hope I don’t get sick-I hate being sick.”
“If you become ill, I will make you some Kostai.”
“Is that the stuff you tried to feed me when I woke-that grey goo in the bowl?
“Yes, but you never tasted it,” Ussay said. “How do you know it is not good?”
Kira turned up her nose. “It smelled like dirty socks.”
Ussay frowned, but when Kira started laughing, her new friend joined right in. It felt good to laugh.
They spent most of the morning walking around the village, taking plenty of opportunities to sit and rest Kira’s shaky legs and sore foot. She was determined to gain her strength back as soon as she could. She hated the idea of being weak and others having to take care of her.
Kira was surprised at how friendly everyone acted and how they all seemed to know her. Of course, who could miss her red hair and dark eyes? Some people shied away, especially mothers with small children, but most were kind. They curtsied or bowed as if she were royalty. At first it made her a little uncomfortable, but then she thought it was kind of fun, like pretending to be a princess when she was little. And she had to admit, she liked the special treatment.
Shortly after midday, Kira happened to step out onto the main road leading up the hill to the castle. When she’d seen the castle earlier in the day, it had appeared dark and mysterious with the sun obscured behind it. Now the sun reflected off the white stone, illuminating every detail. She stood there for several moments, taking in the glorious view.
“Kira, are you all right?” Ussay asked.
Kira nodded. “I didn’t realize how beautiful it was. It’s like a vision. . a heavenly palace for angels.” She tried to remember how it looked when Lydia used the journey stone in Octavion’s lair, but even then, it held no comparison to what she saw now.
“I like seeing it through your eyes,” Ussay said. “When you work there every day, you forget.”
“I hope I never forget.” Kira turned to look at her. “Do you mind if we sit for a while? My feet hurt.”
“We need to get you some shoes.” Ussay motioned for Kira to sit on a small bench near the well in the center of the village. “Once you are rested we will see the cobbler. He may have a pair of shoes to fit you. I do not believe mine are small enough.”
They’d barely sat down when a sense of dread crept over Kira. She had the distinct impression that a Royal was nearby. Surely one wouldn’t appear in the village this close to the new moon phase-at least not a good Royal. “Didn’t you say the Royal’s would be sleeping?”
“Yes. Why do you ask?”
“Curious, that’s all,” Kira lied. But the feeling grew stronger before it finally went away. She couldn’t help be suspicious of the villagers around her. For all she knew, any one of them could be a Royal who meant to do her harm.
“Ussay!” a small voice rang out. Kira and Ussay looked in the direction of the voice to find a young boy running up the cobblestone street. “I have something for you.” He waved a small piece of paper in the air.
Ussay stood and waited for him to come to her. “This is for you. Mara. .” He took a deep breath. “Lady Mara brought it to your mother at the marketplace. She said to give it to you.”
“Thank you Braden.” She ruffled his hair. “Now run along.”
“I cannot,” he said. “I am to wait for a reply.”
“Who’s Lady Mara?” Kira asked.
“Luka’s mother.” Ussay studied the envelope she held in her hand-parchment sealed with a small blob of red wax, the letter “O” stamped in the middle. She slowly turned it over. “I believe this is for you.” She handed it to Kira.
Kira took it from her. On the front were several letters and symbols she didn’t recognize. She ran her finger over the markings and a voice whispered in her mind.
Ussay,
Please see that Kira receives this.
O
Kira stared at the words she could now read written on the paper, but she couldn’t bring herself to open it. She still wasn't sure how she felt about what she saw the night before and she certainly wasn't ready to hear what Octavion had to say about it with the villagers watching and waiting for her reaction.
“Tell her. . there will be no reply,” Kira said.
Ussay motioned for Braden to return with Kira’s answer and then put her hand on her shoulder. “What is it?”
Kira slipped the letter up the sleeve of her dress and brushed off the front of her skirt. “Nothing. Can we get those shoes now? I’d really like to go back to your cottage.”
“As you wish,” Ussay said.
Chapter Twelve
The cobbler had two pairs of shoes-both made for children and way too small. Ussay offered Kira hers, but she refused. By the time they got back to the cottage her feet were on fire. Kira felt grateful they at least weren’t bleeding or all their work would have been in vain. Ussay helped Kira wash them and apply salve. Kira convinced her to apply the same medicine to the scratch on her wrist-the infection appeared to be getting worse.
As the room slowly began to lose its light, Ussay lit a candle and let Kira help replace the black pieces of cloth in the windows. Because of the cramped space, Narissa agreed to stay the night with Ussay’s aunt so they had the room to themselves. Kira offered to stay on the floor, but Ussay refused. When the sounds of the village grew silent, Kira knew the time of darkness was near. Ussay seemed to sense her need for privacy and began straightening the already organized cupboard on the other side of the room.
Kira numbly slipped the envelope out of her sleeve. What could he possibly have to say? She already knew he’d be mortified by what happened the night before and would beg her forgiveness. Reluctantly, she broke the red wax seal and opened it. Inside she found a single piece of parchment. She slid it out of the envelope, unfolded it then held it to her face and took in a deep breath. His musky scent filled her soul with warmth. She’d only been gone one day and she already missed him.
She held the paper in the flickering candlelight and read the words written in her own language.
Kira,
I have seen the fear in your eyes and would give my life to remove it. My worst nightmare could not compare to how I felt when the sun rose on Xantara and the realization of what I had done came to my mind. I pray I have not broken your heart, for I know not how to heal it and I dare only to ask your forgiveness. I hope you do as Ussay instructs to ensure your safety. I will send a carriage to retrieve you both when it is safe.
All my love,
Octavion
She folded the paper, inhaled his sent one last time and slid it back into the envelope. “Is it time?”
“Yes.” Ussay walked to the bed and sat beside her. “Are you all right?”
Kira nodded.
“The letter. . it has his scent?”
“Yes.” Kira knew the hidden meaning behind her words and also knew what needed to be done, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. She clutched the envelope against her chest, hesitant to part with the only tangible piece of him within grasp at that moment. As the tears began to flow, she slowly released it and let if fall into her lap.
Ussay picked it up and held it over the flame. The instant it caught fire, she stepped to the fireplace and threw it on top of the cold ash. Kira watched as the fire consumed it. She leaned over and blew out the candle and the room went black, except for the tiny sparks left from Octavion’s letter. One by one they fizzled out, until only the memory of them remained.
Kira turned her back to the room and curled up under the blanket. When the first scream echoed through the village, she put her hands over her ears and tried to see his face in her mind-his human face-the one she’d fallen in love with. She remembered his deep blue eyes and the way he smiled, exposing his dimples. She lingered on that happy memory. She recalled every detail of his kiss-imagined his arms holding her tight, keeping her warm. Her mind wandered back to the adventures they’d shared until finally she found sleep-her dreams filled with Octavion, the way dreams should be. Dreams a person could lose themselves in. Dreams that could come true.
When she woke, Ussay busied herself building a fire.
“Is it over?” Kira asked.
Ussay jumped. “Kira, you frightened me.”
“Sorry. Did I sleep through the whole thing?” She couldn’t remember feeling so rested.
“Yes. It was actually a quiet night. It is the first time I have seen you sleep without thrashing about. You must have been exhausted.” Ussay grabbed another log and added it to the fire.
Kira barely felt its warmth from across the room. “I guess.” She briskly rubbed her nose to take away the cold.
“Sorry about the chill in the air. The fire will have the room warm in a moment.”
“I’m fine, but how did you sleep? The floor must be freezing.” Kira pulled herself up to sit, but kept the covers wrapped tightly around her body.
“I slept well enough.”
“Well, I don’t care how much you argue with me, I get the floor tonight. It’s the least I can do.”
Ussay’s face lit up and she flashed a big smile. “You, my lady, will sleep in the castle tonight.”
“What? But I thought it wasn’t safe. Don’t we have stay here the night before and the night after a new moon?”
Ussay walked over to the window, pulled off the curtain, then opened the door. Parked outside the cottage was a small ornate carriage pulled by two black horses. In the distance Kira heard the deep clang of a bell.
“Octavion sent word. He went out before nightfall and hunted with Luka. When darkness came, he had already satisfied his hunger so the pull of the moons did not affect him as badly.” Ussay closed the door and walked back to sit next to Kira. “He had a good night.”
Kira sighed. “And he’s all right?”
Ussay nodded, her eyes sparkling with the glow from the fire. “I have instructed the coachman to wait. I would like to eat and wash before we return. I cannot offer a bath, but I can get water from the well to rid us of the dust from our walk yesterday.”
“Awesome.”