He said, "Ola." The girl smiled shyly and began to fill a wooden bowl.
Another girl came in with a handful of objects. Remo saw a couple of bone knives and a fist-size stone.
"What's this stuff?" he asked, tasting the soup.
"You asked for these," the girl replied, kneeling at his feet. She took one of Remo's hands and examined the nails critically. The cook took one of the other knives and approached Remo from the other side.
"Looks like I'm in for the Moovian version of a shave and manicure," Remo said, pushing his soup aside.
Chiun frowned. "Do not forget your soup," he said evenly, pushing the bowl back under Remo's nose.
"It can wait," Remo said, eyes on the sinuous bodies hovering over him. They smelled nice too, he noticed. Like coconuts.
"No," Chiun said suddenly. "The other thing can wait. Shoo, shoo!" he said to the maidens. "Come back later. My son has fought a hard battle and needs to replenish his strength. "
The native girls fled the room on bare feet. "Hey! What's with you?" Remo demanded.
"You must eat first. Keep up your strength."
"I like to set my own priorities," Remo growled, his unhappy face watching the girls scurry down the corridor.
"Eat," said Chiun.
Reluctantly Remo started in on the soup. After a few tastes he was greedily devouring it, the girls of Moo forgotten.
"I can't seem to get enough of this stuff," he said.
"I will tell the hens to continue laying," Chiun said blandly, "so that you do not run out for the duration of our stay here."
"We can't stay here a whole month," Remo protested.
"We are due a vacation. This will be it."
"What if Smith needs us?"
"Then he can summon us, as always."
"How? There aren't any phones here."
"How is that my fault?" Chiun squeaked. "According to my contract, I am permitted to vacation where I will. Nowhere does it say that the Master of Sinanju is obligated to call ahead to see if there are telephones at his chosen retreat. Besides, I did not know the number of the High Moo."
"Smith is going to be very upset," Remo cautioned.
"Let him be upset. If he complains, I will tell him that he is not the only worthy emperor in the world. He has a rival, the High Moo."
"I don't think he'll appreciate that. And what happens after the thirty days?"
"Who can say?" Chiun said mischievously. "Thirty days is a long time from now. We live in an uncertain world. Anything is possible. Moo sank once. Perhaps America will be next. Then you will thank me for bringing you to this lovely land."
"Dream on," said Remo, starting in on his second bowl. After he was done, Remo said, "Okay, call back the girls."
"For what?"
"For these," Remo said, showing his nearly half-inchlong nails.
Chiun took Remo's hands in his. "If you let them grow, soon they will curve inward like mine."
"Not interested," Remo snapped, withdrawing his hands.
"Why not? We are on Moo now. You no longer have your lame excuse not to grow them long."
"Chiun, I'm supposed to be an agent for my government. I gotta blend in with the natives, so to speak."
"Now that you are on Moo, you can blend in with Moovian natives."
"I don't see any long-nailed people on Moo either."
"Nor do I. But where we are now, Emperor Smith's absurd secrecy mania is not in effect. We walk this land known for what we are, admired for our work, and honored for our skills. Wear your nails with pride, Remo. Who knows, you might come to like them."
"No chance," Remo snapped, grabbing up a sharp knife. He attacked his left hand with the serrated edge. The blade dug in and Remo made furious sawing motions. Dust rose up. Remo paused. To his chagrin, he saw the nail was intact. And the knife had lost its edge.
"Hey!" he said, looking up. He noticed that Chiun had been bent over his shoulder, watching intently. "Look at this. "
"Ah, wonderfully strong."
"Are you kidding? This knife's a joke."
"I meant the nail."
"Maybe I can find a metal knife."
"Not on Moo. All metal is saved for coins and jewelry. And you have ruined a knife of the finest bone."
Remo looked at the knife. It was white and polished. And over a foot long.
"Wonder what kind of animal they have on the island to make a knife this long?" he wondered.
"The fiercest, most dangerous one," Chiun said.
"Yeah?"
"Man."
Remo dropped the knife. "This is a human bone?" he asked.
Chiun picked it up. "Yes, and from the freshness, I would say it was made from the femur of one of the octopus worshipers we vanquished last night."