“I can’t help you,” I insisted.
Walking among rows of flowers, shrubs, and trees with a dead guy who spouted poetry and stole bodies was weird, but finding out that he wanted me to save his soul was weird squared to infinity.
“I beseech you, Amber, give me a chance.”
Gabe’s mix of old-styled and modern language, spoken in such a deep refined voice, made me feel like following him to the ends of the universe. He looked so vulnerable, like a lost child trying to find his way home, that my heart ached for him.
“I don’t have any special powers, and I don’t know how to help you.”
“Use your connections to the other side.”
Connections? This was a word that came up a lot whenever I researched becoming an entertainment agent. Knowing the right people in influential places was like an “open sesame” spell that magically unlocked doors. If Gabe had asked me to help him get into an audition or how to become a Hollywood star, I’d be right there offering advice. But this was beyond my knowledge — especially since my only “contacts” on the other side were my grandmother and my dead dog Cola.
“Sorry.” I shook my head. “You’re looking at the wrong Temp Lifer if you expect connections. I’m a newbie without any influence.”
“Your grandmother is head of the Temp Lifer program.”
“So?” I asked warily, wanting to kick myself for telling him about Grammy Greta’s job. It had slipped out when he’d trapped me on a boat and I’d been desperate to escape.
“I hope you’ll convince her to see me. If I can explain that I’m sorry and want to return, then I could go back without interference from the DD Team.”
“I can’t just pick up my cell and call her,” I lied.
“Leave a message through your GEM.” He rushed on before I could interrupt. “Don’t look so surprised that I know how GEMs work. Remember, I was a Temp Lifer.”
“Until you turned Dark,” I accused him, wondering if I was crazy for talking calmly to the most-wanted dead criminal alive.
“I had a good reason.” He glanced around as if to make sure no one was close, then gestured that we sit on a bench in the shadows of shade trees and roses. “Despite all the injustices in my Earth life, when I became a Temp Lifer I excelled at my job. I’d thought I’d found my purpose in death. Everything was going great — until they assigned me the body of a shy young gentleman.”
“How long ago was this?” I sat a safe distance from him on the bench so that he couldn’t touch me.
“Around the turn of the century.”
“Really? I thought it was much longer, like before I was born.”
“The twentieth century,” he clarified. “My Host Body lacked the courage to approach the girl he loved and was going to lose her to another suitor. I was prepared to woo her with sweet words and romantic bouquets. Flowers always win a young lady’s heart.” He gestured over to a garden of brilliant blossoms in red, yellow, pink, and lavender. “But when I met his young lady, everything changed.”
“Why? Did you fall in love with her?”
“Quite the opposite.” His eyes narrowed. “She was the daughter of the woman whose betrayal sent me to the gallows.”
“No way!”
“Unfortunately, it’s true. But I had no alternative but to perform my job. A Temp Lifer must always follow through on his Host Body’s plans,” he added with a bitter snort. “I recited Barrett and Lord Byron, and wrote a love sonnet for my host’s sweetheart. When I proposed marriage, she eagerly accepted. I gave her a ring — but I couldn’t go through with it. All I could think about was how her mother had destroyed my life. So I yanked the ring off her hand and told her she was a fool to believe in love.”
I gasped. “No!”
“It was the only way to toughen her foolish heart and to save my Host Soul from marrying into a murderous family.”
“You wanted revenge,” I said.
“Justice,” he insisted. “Afterwards, I knew no one would understand and I could never go back to being a Temp Lifer, so I switched into another body. It was amazingly easy. I quickly discovered there are more freedoms to being in a temporary body. No rules, and powers that you won’t find in your precious GEM.”
“What sort of powers?”
“Mind connecting, memory manipulation, and astral transporting. You’ve been told you can’t leave your Host Body until they decide to call you back — but that’s not true. You could leave that body any time.”
I shook my head. “I’ve tried and it didn’t work. The only way I can switch is when my assignment is over.”
“That’s what they want you to believe — but it’s not true. Help me meet with your grandmother, and I’ll teach you the secrets of tapping into your power.”
“I don’t want to learn your kind of secrets.”
“Not even how to mind-blend with your Host Soul? You could go to your friend right now and ask her anything. Don’t you have questions you’d like to ask?”
Of course I did — but I wasn’t about to admit that to him.
“It’s unfair how Temp Lifers must figure out their missions with so little information,” he went on. “Especially since those who run the program are aware of these useful skills.”
“You mean my grandmother?”
“Of course. She’s privy to many secrets that she’ll never reveal. But I can show you, and you’d never have to rely on a GEM again.” His voice was so sultry, so tempting …
I didn’t want to believe him. Yet Grammy had joked about not using a GEM. She’d said they were annoying (which was true), but maybe she had another reason. Did she know how to pluck memories from her Host Body? Is that why she seemed so comfortable doing her job without the stresses I was going through? But wouldn’t it make more sense to arm me with more powers, too? It wasn’t fair to leave me stuck in confusion while I struggled to make sense of my assignment.
I thought back to the rare moments when I’d picked up memories from the bodies I’d temporarily inhabited. It had always happened randomly, without any warning. I’d assumed it was a gift from the other side to help my assignment. But if what Gabe was saying was true, I’d accidentally tapped into my own powers.
Still, if I was supposed to know these things, Grammy would have told me. I trusted her far more than I trusted a Dark Lifer.
“I’ll pass on the lessons,” I told him, running my hand idly over a rough edge of the bench. “I’d help you without any bribes, but there’s nothing I can do. You can’t meet with my grandmother.”
“Why not?”
“She’s not there.” I gestured to the sky as if the clouds floating overhead hid a portal to the other side. “Grammy’s away … on vacation.”
He knitted his brows, regarding me skeptically. “No one vacations from the other side.”
“I can’t contact her, but I can get a message through my GEM to the DD Team and ask them to give you a second chance.”
“No!” He jumped up from the bench, nearly tripping over another hose that snaked across the path. “If I go back, it will be on my terms — not captured pitifully by the DDT. They hate me.”
“Grammy says hate isn’t allowed where she lives now.”
“Neither are vacations, but as you said, she makes her own rules. And she’s not the only one. The DD Team can’t wait to toss me in a dark pit and doom me to eternal hell. I won’t get the chance to make up for my mistakes and see the light of auras again — unless your grandmother could talk to them first.”
“Talking to my grandmother is impossible.”
“When will she return?”
“Um … I don’t really know.” I looked down at my temporary body and shook my head. “But when I hear from her, I’ll tell her you’re sorry and ask her to go easy on you. I’m sure that when I explain everything, she’ll help you. Being banished to a hell pit isn’t fair. I’ll tell Grammy that I think you should have a chance to make up for your crimes.”
He bent close to my face, not touching me but so near that warm tingles sizzled through me. “There’s a light in you that makes me want to be better, to do good things.”
“I hope you get the chance.”
“A chance is all I ask for.” He closed his eyes, grimacing as if haunted with dark thoughts. “It’s like I’ve been lost forever and suddenly I can see the right doorway ahead, but it’s blocked and there’s no time to find my way.”
“Grammy says time doesn’t run the same on the other side.”
“But it’s running out for me here. I’m weary of going from body to body and all the pretense. It’s time to stop. When my time in this body expires, I won’t find a new one.”
“What if I can’t talk to my grandmother before then?”
“My soul is already heavy with my crimes. I won’t add any more.”
“But if you don’t switch, the DD Team will find you.”
He sighed. “Yes, the worst may happen.”
“So you should escape now, while you have the chance.”
“I should, but my soul is so weary of hiding.”
“I really will talk to my grandmother for you.”
“While I appreciate the offer, I need to talk to her personally.”
“You can’t — not now, anyway. But maybe there’s someone else you can talk to.”
“There’s no one else. If I can’t talk with your grandmother, I might as well give up now and turn myself in.”
“You don’t mean that! Fight for your life … or lives … or death.” I wasn’t really sure how all the worked, but I hated to see anyone give up.
“I didn’t beg for mercy when I was walking those final steps to the gallows, and I won’t beg now. All I can hope for is your grandmother’s sense of fairness and mercy. I’m not asking you to defend me to her, just to set up a meeting so I can plead my own case.”
“I would if I could … ” I glanced down at the damp ground and a smudge of dirt on my sneakers. With a shake of my head, I lifted my gaze back to his. “Like I said, it just isn’t possible. She can’t meet with anyone now.”
“So be it,” he said, with such agonized resignation that my heart crumbled. “I’ll leave now, so you’ll never be burdened by my problems again.”
A half hour ago I would have jumped for joy if he’d offered to leave, but now it felt all wrong. By refusing to help, I’d signed his death sentence. “Don’t go, Gabe. Let me help—”
I thought about his story of the betrayal that ended his life. He hadn’t been much older than me, yet his life was over. Stealing bodies and breaking hearts was wrong and I couldn’t forgive him that easily. But I couldn’t forgive myself if I didn’t at least try to help.
So I agreed to set up a meeting with my grandmother.
Heaven help me.
* * *
The drive back to the cemetery was surreal.
Along the way, though, the fear I felt toward Gabe started shifting into something I couldn’t define. Although he made no move to touch me, I was very aware of his arm casually resting on the compartment separating our bucket seats. Not his arm, I reminded myself, but a borrowed arm from a stolen body. I may feel sorry for him, but that didn’t suddenly make him a paragon of virtue. His personality was closer to a devil than an angel, and I had no business sneaking glances at him and inhaling his salty sea scent. If the light touch of his hands electrified me, how would it feel to be in his arms …
Down, evil thoughts! What was wrong with me? It was wrong to think these kind of thoughts about anyone except Eli. He was the only guy I cared about — not someone who’d died over a century ago.
What I should be thinking about was how to set up a meeting with my grandmother. If I explained everything to her, would she understand? Would she agree to talk to him? I’d like to think so … but I doubted it. More likely she’d be furious I’d broken rules in such a big way and kick me right out of my temporary body.
As we parted and Gabe slid into his own car, I kept my expression calm but inside I was quaking. Damn. Why had I promised to help him? It was almost like I’d been under a spell.
Resisting the urge for one last look at him, I shifted into reverse and got the hell out of there. I should have driven straight to my real home and talked to Grammy. Except if I saw her and explained about Gabe, she might get angry that I didn’t report him. Even worse — I might start blushing, which would lead to lots of awkward questions. It was confusing how Gabe made me feel, and I didn’t want Grammy to get the wrong idea. Eli was the guy I cared about; Gabe was just someone who needed help. I needed to make careful plans for how to approach Grammy about Gabe.
So I headed back to Alyce’s. Her mother would be at work and I’d have the house to myself. I’d make some lunch, maybe watch some TV, then get on with my plan to save Gabe’s soul.
When I reached Alyce’s, the door was locked and I had to dig down to the bottom of Monkey Bag to find a key.
That’s when I heard Alyce’s cell phone beeping.
Picking it up, I saw a text from Dustin.
Hoping he hadn’t been arrested at the protest and needing a lawyer, I tapped a button and read the short message.
Good news!
Z will meet 2nite.
You’ve got a date!