The "Special Branch" team had a large, nondescript van parked in the loading bay. They bundled Josh inside, then climbed in themselves: Suzanne first, then Raj and Hannah, while Vikram went up front with Tony and Big Tel, who was driving. Raj undid his tie.
"I hate wearing suits," he said.
"Really? I think you look handsome, all dressed up," said Hannah.
"Well…"
The van swung into motion.
"Did you all see?" Vikram held up a phone, showing aerial views of cloud cover over California, ash falling from the sky. "You saw the mushroom clouds?"
"Not even Brand is that fucking insane," said Tony.
"Are you sure?"
"Well, no."
Josh opened his mouth, found himself with nothing to say, and just sat there, letting the motion of the van take him where it would. Everything had changed, and whatever would happen, would happen, que sera, sera, while he no longer had the energy to do anything but watch.
His arms, he noticed from a distance, were trembling all by themselves.
"Oh, Josh." Suzanne was holding him. "Oh, my God."
"You did good," said Hannah. "Amazing."
Josh blinked.
I feel nothing. It's all over.
Both tiredness and energy were gone, leaving him in a state of nothingness, of neither-nor. His brain seemed to be floating.
How very strange.
"The only amazing thing," he said, "was that I didn't get cut."
Hannah and Raj looked at each other.
"What?" said Josh.
"Darling." Suzanne's eyes were wet. "They cut you to pieces. Can't you tell?"
He looked down at himself, soaked through with what he had thought was water.
"Oh, God."
"Josh, you're going to be all-"
Oh, God.
Blackness grew inside him like a mushroom cloud.