James could feel the blood pulsing through his head. He could hear it whooshing past his ears. He focused on the pain that came with every contraction of his heart. For brief moments between the contractions, the pain lessened, minute reprieves from the pain he was sure would end his life. He had no sight, no feeling. All he was aware of was the pain that followed and the reprieve that ended the cycle. It could have been hours, days, or weeks. All sense of time was lost. His mind would allow him nothing except the cycle.
Finally came a change. He became aware of his body, that he was prone, lying on a soft surface. He tried to move, but his body didn’t respond. He tried to open his eyes, but he could not. The pain, which had previously been localized to his head, spread throughout his entire body. Each pulse of his heart caused him excruciating pain. It burned. He wanted to cry out, but he could not. He felt a light pressure on his back, as is something small were touching him. He felt the pressure again, in a spot next to the first. Then he felt it on his leg. In an instant it felt as if he were being touched all over his body. At first it was an odd, unfamiliar sensation. He imagined someone poking him with their smallest finger. A thousand fingers alternately touching him everywhere. He realized after a moment that the new sensation had taken the place of the pain. As soon as he searched for it, he knew the pain was there. This other sensation allowed him to distract his thoughts from the pain. He focused intently on it, determined to discover its source despite his immobilization and blindness.
In his state of intense concentration, James realized his hearing had returned. He had been so singularly bent upon the finger-like sensation that he’d ignored everything else. It had a familiarity, this new sound, but James could not place it. The fingers abruptly stopped along with the noise he was so desperate to identify. A new sound, different from anything he’d heard previously, filled his ears. He realized along with this sound, his body was moving. He could feel his body writhe in synchronization with the sound. He could feel his hands beneath his body. He tried to move them, but they would not respond. His feet, splayed out to his side, were likewise unresponsive to his commands.
He tried to open his eyes once again. He wasn’t sure if he’d accomplished his goal because the world around him remained dark. His body stilled. James grew anxious as his continued attempts to gain control over his body failed. Is this what the Never is? To live in darkness without feeling? he wondered. The horror of it consumed him. A sound pierced the darkness. It took a moment for James to realize he was crying out, wailing in the darkness. He forced himself to cease. He slowed his breathing, concentrating on the air passing over his tongue and mouth. It made a raspy bubbling sound as it escaped his body, and he realized that he must be lying in a shallow pool of water. He exhaled hard and his suspicions were confirmed as he heard the water blow away from his mouth. He could feel the dampness and began to shiver.
Light, beautiful, immediate, and warming, filled his eyes, and he could see. He took in his surroundings. Everything was green. He could feel the warmth of the light filling his body. He tried again to move his hands, and they responded. He could feel his fingers twitching beneath his body. He tried his toes. They likewise responded. In an instant, he could move his entire body.
James rolled over and sat up. He realized that he was surrounded by plants with leaves wider across than his outstretched arms. Above him towered trees larger than any he had ever seen. The trunks of these giants were shrouded in green moss. The lowest branches hung stories above. The canopy was so far away he couldn’t make out any details. He shivered again and realized that he was completely naked. He looked down at the place where he had been lying. A bed of leaves still held the imprint of his body. Several inches of water filled the depression.
James scanned his surroundings. All he could see were tree trunks and the giant-leaf, ground-dwelling plants. He tried to determine which direction the light was coming from, but, curiously, there were no shadows. He took a deep breath and struggled to remember an incantation that would have come easily to him previously. Finally, he plucked it from the recesses of his mind. He held out his hand and expelled the ancient language from the depths of his lungs. “ Errelebatu,” he said. Nothing happened. He stood perplexed for a moment. He wondered if he had mispronounced it, so he tried it again. Each attempt was met with the same result: nothing. He tried other incantations, dozens of them. Each yielded nothing.
Frustrated and cold, he realized he needed to move. He picked a direction and headed out. As he brushed past one of the giant-leaf plants, he jumped back in pain and alarm. He looked down at his thigh. Blood seeped from an incision that stretched from hip to knee. He instinctively raised his hand and attempted a healing incantation, but he was again unsuccessful. He cursed, frustrated. James lifted the giant leaf and inspected its underside. Thousands of needle-sharp protrusions stood ready to ward off any animal foolish enough to be lured by the succulent-looking foliage. He looked up again hoping to find a direction less choked with the giant-leaf plants. They littered the forest floor in every direction. He let out a breath and continued more cautiously on his way.