Thor and Catrina sat on opposite sides of her kitchen table. Two half-empty cups of coffee grew cold between them. Neither one had spoken a word for the better part of twenty minutes.
“Look,” said Thor, “I think we should…”
“I really don’t want to talk about it, Thor.”
“We can’t pretend it didn’t happen.”
“Yes,” said Catrina, “yes, we can.”
“You and I both know that’s a lie.”
Catrina began swirling the coffee in her cup, averting her eyes from Thor’s.
“What happened last night…” he continued.
“No,” she said, snapping her head up. “I said no, Thor.”
“For fuck’s sake, Catrina. We’re friends, we work together. We have to talk about this.”
Catrina swiftly gathered up both coffee mugs, emptying their contents in the sink and turning her back to Thor.
“I appreciate you taking me back to your place after I got poisoned, I do,” continued Thor. “You were looking out for me and… I mean, I’d like to think I’d have done the same thing if it had been you, but, I don’t know, maybe, in hindsight, maybe it wasn’t the smartest… especially given the circumstances…”
“You should leave.”
“Look, neither of us could’ve known… I mean, alright, I wasn’t really surprised it happened. And I don’t think you were either, if you could just be honest about it…”
“I said go. Now.”
“Damn it, no, Catrina. We need to get this out of the way.”
Catrina turned to face him, rage in her eyes and a knife in her hands.
“What happened last night…” she said, her voice barely controlled.
Catrina was only holding a butter knife, so she wasn’t actually as menacing as she thought she was, but it was still pretty clear she was pissed. Thor got that much.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
Catrina softened, the murderous fury drifting from her face. She tossed the knife back into the sink.
“No,” she said, “don’t apologize. You don’t need to. It wasn’t your fault.”
“I know,” said Thor, “but I feel responsible. Let’s face it, if I wasn’t here it wouldn’t… hell, it couldn’t have happened.”
“I know, Thor. I get it. I just… I don’t want to talk about it. I know it wasn’t your fault, but, at the same time, you’re right, if you… If I hadn’t… Look, we can’t change what happened.”
“I know. And I know it’s weird, uncomfortable. But I don’t get why you’re so upset about it. Hell, I’m kind of… proud. All things considered, it was pretty fucking impressive.”
“Jesus, Thor,” said Catrina, her face turning red. Then she started laughing. Thor joined her.
“I’m sorry I defiled your bathroom, Catrina.”
“It’s OK, Thor, I forgive you. But, please, can we not talk about this ever, ever again? That was… the single most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen.”
“Man, who knew battery acid would fuck someone up like that? It was like a god damned volcano in my ass.”
“Please don’t refer to it like that ever again. Ever.”
Thor began laughing again. “Did you see the ceiling?”
“Yes,” said Catrina solemnly.
“Honestly,” said Thor, still laughing, “it might just be easier to move.”