Roselyn arrived at the bar at the same time Alan staggered in from the other side. A long strip of pink toilet paper was tucked into the back of his trousers. Half of the lounge clientele were mesmerized by this flimsy tail sliding along the floor behind him.
"Damnit," Alan whined. "They're all playing hard to get."
"Who are?" Roselyn asked.
"All the babes." Alan glanced around accusingly at his friends. "Did you guys warn them?"
Nigel bent over, his face radiating martyred dismay, and tugged the toilet paper free. "We didn't have to."
"What?" Alan did a double take at the paper. "Oh, thanks. It must have got stuck in my cleft. My round." He clicked his fingers loudly at the barmaid. "Oi, how about some service?"
"I have some news," Lawrence told Roselyn.
She grinned. "Me too."
"You first."
"No, you."
They both laughed.
"Ladies first," Lawrence said.
"I'm going to throw up," Alan muttered.
"Okay." Roselyn fished round in her small handbag and produced a memory chip. "I'm late because I was downloading this from the Eilean's communication AS; it's just arrived in orbit. Judith sent me another series."
Lawrence gagged in wonder. He took the chip from her hands with a great deal of reverence. "Series six?" he asked.
"Uh-huh." She accepted a margarita from John and carefully wiped the salt from a section of the rim. "The last one."
"Hellfire. The final episode. I wonder if they get home."
Roselyn cocked an eyebrow demurely. "Only one way to find out. Oh, and there was some stuff from the fan site, too. Half a dozen series-related i-games, I think, and a whole load of generated graphic follow-ons."
"Fantastic."
"Damn." Alan grinned at Roselyn. "This is a moment like that stunt your God does. What is it? Oh yeah, he turns up again or something."
"The Second Coming of The Christ. A time of revelation throughout the universe."
"That's the one." Alan raised his beer glass. "Here's to Lawrence finally finding out what happened to a bunch of jerkoff actors when they asked for a pay raise in series seven."
"There was a proper story arc," Lawrence protested. Too late he realized the fatal mistake of letting Alan know you cared about something.
"Whoo ho! I was right, it's a revelation! Please, Lawrence, do us all a big favor and get a life."
"Alan?" Roselyn asked in a voice tinged with curiosity. "Do you know that girl?"
"Which one?'
"Over there, in the blue top."
"Her?" His glass slopped about in the girl's general direction as he laughed his short dirty laugh. "Damn, see what you mean, two puppies wrestling in a blue sack."
Roselyn's face remained serene. "Yes. Her."
"Never seen her before in my life, Your Honor. And I would definitely remember." He drained the last of his beer and burped. Fortunately, he'd ordered too many, so there was a fresh glass he could lift straight off the bar.
Over Alan's head, Lawrence gave Vinnie a frantic grimace and mouthed: "When did he start?"
Vinnie shrugged helplessly.
"She's been looking at you," Roselyn said.
"Fuck! Really?" Alan laughed again and poked Richard in the chest. "I told you. It's statistics." He straightened himself up and walked over to the girl. There was a momentary flash of panic on her face when she saw him approach.
"Remind me never to annoy you," Nigel told Roselyn.
Lawrence was wincing as he followed Alan's progress. "I'm not sure I can watch this. The pain level's too high."
"So what did you want to tell me?" Roselyn asked.
"Oh, yes." The joy returned to Lawrence's life. He pocketed the memory chip. "I got a letter from Templeton University today."
Roselyn's gaze was one of pure admiration as he explained about his preliminary acceptance and the skiing trip. "I knew you could do it, Lawrence," she murmured quietly. "Well done." She kissed him just below his ear.
"What about your mother?" he asked apprehensively. "Do you think she'll let you come to Orchy with me?"
"You leave her to me."
His hands went around her, pressing into the small of her back. "Sounds good to me." They kissed. He could taste the sharp tang of the margarita on her lips.
"Er, guys, I think we should get over there," Vinnie said.
Alan was so engrossed with making obscene small talk to the girl in the blue top that he hadn't noticed her boyfriend standing behind him.
"No way." John was shaking his head. "Look at the effing size of him!"
"Bigger they are, the harder they fall," Rob declared. He was almost as drunk as Alan.
"As long as he falls on you, not me," Nigel said.
"He's our friend," Lawrence said. Somehow he couldn't summon up much conviction. The boyfriend had a couple of friends with him, too.
"Just tell the bar staff," Roselyn said urgently. "The bouncers will sort it out."