“Evie!” Lend said, panicked.
I looked down at him. I was rising into the air; I couldn’t stop. If I didn’t release them now, I didn’t think I’d be able to. Finding the outline of the stars, I pushed my hand forward—and met resistance.
This was it.
“Stop.” Reth’s voice was hard, commanding. My arms wouldn’t move. “That is not the gate you need to open. If you let them go now, all this will be wasted. We need those souls! This is not the right gate.”
I focused, willing the fire to concentrate in my arm. It grew even brighter, turning from gold to pure white, blinding in its intensity. And then, still pulling against the power of Reth’s voice, I lifted a single finger and traced the stars, the light leaving a trail of white between each point until the entire gate was outlined.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “Go,” I whispered. For the briefest moment I felt peace, gratitude; then excruciating pain as the fire ripped straight out of my body and shot through the gate of stars. Just when I thought I could stand the pain no longer, it was over. Almost. A single lingering soul—Lish, my Lish—paused, passing through my heart in what I knew was her last good-bye.
As my body went cold and dark I fell toward the earth, wondering again what death would feel like.
I smiled, grateful I had at least known my own soul if only for a moment, and then everything went black.
HEAVEN, HELL, AND THAT LITTLE PLACE BETWEEN
B eing dead wasn’t supposed to hurt. Where was the fairness in that? If I was dead, the least the universe could do was make it painless. Maybe I was in hell, but I really didn’t think I deserved that.
Besides, hell was supposed to be hot, and I was freezing. Absolutely freezing.
I moved my legs, trying to get more comfortable. Holy bleep, I wasn’t dead! If I were dead, I wouldn’t have my body. As my soreness settled in, I knew I definitely had a body. That hurt. All over. I forced my eyelids open, feeling like they weighed twenty pounds each.
Not hell. Not heaven, either, because I really hoped that place would have more taste than this ugly paneled ceiling with fluorescent lights. “Ugh,” I said, figuring that one word summed up both how I felt and what I thought of the decor.
I raised my head, ignoring the swimming lights in front of my eyes, and looked down at myself. I was covered with several blankets and one of my arms had a lovely little IV taped to it. Then I noticed something really bad—my dress was gone. I might not have been dead, but if anything had happened to that dress, someone was going to be.
Lifting my arm to scratch the area around the IV tape, I stopped. The glow—the liquid fire that had been there since Reth forced it on me—was gone. All of it, every last bit from him and Vivian. I was both relieved and sad. With my flames gone, everything was strangely heavy, like gravity pulled harder than normal on me, binding me to the earth.
I felt around my body then, looking for damage. Nowhere seemed especially sorer than anywhere else. I sighed, laying my head back down. Maybe I was here because I was dying. Maybe letting go of all those souls hadn’t killed me, but I didn’t have enough left to hang on for much longer.
Or maybe I should just push the freaking call button and ask a nurse. The worst that could happen was them coming in with stun guns, having figured out I was a freak of nature. I paused. That would actually be pretty bad. I’d take a nap first. At least then I’d be well rested if I was going to be interrogated or something.
I fell into a strange, exhausted sleep. I thought I heard the door open, but couldn’t muster the energy to open my eyes or move. Someone set something down on the table next to me, then sat on the edge of the bed. A gentle hand brushed the hair back from my forehead, and then lips brushed the top of my head.
The bed sprung back and soft steps padded away. I heard a small, soft sigh—a happy one.
“Raquel?” I murmured, finally forcing my eyes open. The room was empty. Disappointment washed over me. I had been sure it was her. I wanted it to be her.
A vase with an explosion of bright tropical flowers was on the table next to me, with a small card.
My hands trembling, I opened it. It read, “Be happy, my darling girl. You’ll be missed more than you’ll ever know. Love, Raquel.”
I looked back at the door, my heart fluttering. I wanted to say good-bye, even if it would make things harder in the long run, even though I knew Raquel wouldn’t leave IPCA and I wouldn’t go back. Our time together really was over.
Suddenly I missed her more than ever before.
I wiped a small tear away, feeling very alone in this stupid room with its salmon-colored walls and worn furniture. Where was Lend? I was more than a little disappointed. If this were Easton Heights, Lend would have been by my bedside the whole time, having cried himself to sleep holding my hand. Then I’d gently wake him up and we’d kiss like crazy. Of course, we’d also break up before the end of the episode, which I didn’t like quite so well.
My stomach tied itself in horrible knots. Maybe Lend didn’t want to be here. I had, after all, nearly sucked out his soul. I closed my eyes as the memories of what happened overwhelmed me. “Vivian,” I whispered, wanting to vomit. Had I killed her?
A throat cleared next to me and I sat up in bed, startled. “Raquel?”
“Hardly.”
“Oh, go away,” I snapped, turning to look at Reth, who had made himself comfortable in a chair next to my bed.
He glared at me. “I’m very disappointed in you, Evelyn. After all that time, everything I gave you.
Very disappointed indeed.”
I laughed. What can I say, I was loopy from pain and an empty stomach. And I was done with Reth and his crap. “Ouch. I’m devastated.”
“Not only did you release the soul I gave you but you didn’t even fill your end of the prophecy. The prophecy I worked very hard to make sure you lived to hear, I might add.”
“See, that’s the problem with putting your prophecies in vague poem form. Because I filled it exactly—released all those souls.”
His eyes flashed with fury. “You weren’t meant to release them, you silly child. You were meant to release me. Us.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It’s hardly your business now!”
“Sorry. Guess you should have been clearer. Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to go back to sleep.”
He stood. “I am not finished with you yet.”
I lifted my hand, palm toward him. “Really? Because lemme tell you, having all those souls inside me, I’d be lying if I said it didn’t give me a real taste for them. So unless you want to lose yours, I suggest you stay far, far away from me. Got it?”
His face went ice cold and he smiled at me. “You cannot last on your own, my love. You will need more, and then you’ll become what you’re meant to be. When that happens, I’ll forgive you.” He turned and walked through a door in the wall.
I exhaled. I couldn’t believe he had been dissuaded that easily, and I was sure he’d be back someday. But his words wouldn’t leave me. I loved life. I loved this world, and I especially loved Lend. I didn’t want to leave it, but I wouldn’t become Vivian, no matter how strong the temptation would be.
I pulled down the neck of my hospital gown and gasped. My heart, which I had expected to be as cold and empty as my wrist, glowed with a faint light. It was subtler than when Reth put soul in me, but there was definitely still something there. It was both puzzling and comforting.
The doorknob turned, startling me. I yanked my gown back into place as Lend burst in, out of breath and upset. “I’m so sorry! The doctor said you probably wouldn’t wake up for a few more hours, and so I thought I’d—Evie, I’m so sorry, I wanted to be here.”
I smiled as he rushed across the room and took my hand in his. It was nice to see his real face again.
As amazing as his soul was, I’d rather see him. “So what happened?” I asked.
He shook his head. “Man, it was crazy. After Reth took you away, I called my dad. We raced back and saw you and Reth. You were all weird and floated up in the sky, then you went stiff and you dropped. I caught you, but I kinda didn’t do a great job.” He looked sheepish. “Your head hit the ground pretty hard. So Reth said in his stupid commanding voice, ‘I’ll be taking her with me,’ and I said, ‘Over my dead body,’ and he shrugged like that was fine by him and started toward me. But then my dad, who had gone back to the car as soon as you started floating, came out with his golf club. I never understood why he keeps custom golf clubs everywhere since he doesn’t actually golf.
But then he held it up in the air and said, ‘I’ve got a nine iron that says otherwise.’”
“You’re kidding me.”