"I thought that you people had warehouses full of these props." He emphasized the word "props" so Bronzini would know they spoke the same language.
"We do, sir, but in this particular film we need Chinese-made AK-47's."
"Ah, I see. The recent bans."
"Actually, Senator, those are semiautomatic weapons that have been banned. We need the fully automatic versions. You see, a prop rifle is usually a fully operational weapon. It's the loads that are blanks."
"Yes, I see your difficulty, Bart. May I call you Bart?"
"You can call me Mary if it will get me the waiver. I'm in a jam here. Filming starts in two days and the only way we can get these weapons to our location in time is with a State Department waiver."
Senator Ralston was amazed at Bronzini's quiet demeanor. He half-expected him to come charging into the room screaming his demands at the top of his lungs. The man knew the cardinal rule for tapping into the Washington power flow: if you can't buy it, suck up to it.
"Bart," the senator said, jumping to his feet, "I think I can do something for you on this."
"Great," Bronzini said, cracking a relieved smile.
"But you gotta do something for me in return."
"What's that?" Bronzini asked, suddenly wary.
The senator put a friendly arm around Bronzini's shoulders.
"I'm going to have to go into these infamous smoke-filled rooms we got here in the capital and go to bat for you," he said seriously. "It would help a lot if I had a lever with my fellow committee members."
"Anything," Bronzini said. "Anything I can do, I will."
Senator Ralston smiled expansively. This was going to be easier than he had expected.
"Would you mind posing for a photo with me?"
"Oh, absolutely."
"Sally, will you come in here? And bring the camera." Breathlessly the senator's secretary flew into the room, clutching an expensive Japanese camera. Brunzini noticed almost with a start that the red letters over the lens read "Nishitsu."
"Christ, what don't those people manufacture?" he mumbled.
"Stand right here," Senator Ralston was saying happily. He was thinking about how this photo would look framed on his office wall. For in Washington, power was in whom you knew. Connections. Now, an actor like Bartholomew Bronzini might not have much clout among his fellow power brokers, but impressing them was two-thirds of the game.
Bronzini posed for so many shots he began to feel like a Playgirl centerfold. The senator put his arm around him. They shook hands in three different poses. And when it was over, Senator Ralston personally saw the famous actor to the door.
"A pleasure doing business with you," he said broadly. "You'll have that waiver by close of business tomorrow."
"Thank you, sir," said Bartholomew Bronzini in his sincere but flat voice.
"Sir," Senator Ralston said to himself as he watched the actor depart, ponytail switching. "Bartholomew Bronzini called me sir."
He never dreamed that for a handful of snapshots he had just struck a deal to arm an occupying army. Bartholomew Bronzini entered his suite at the Lafayette Hotel. Jiro Isuzu was waiting for him. Jiro bounced from his chair with the expectant look of a faithful dog presenting himself to his master.
"Yes?" he asked. It sounded like a cat's hiss. Bronzini nodded.
"Yes. He promised us the waiver by tomorrow."
"This is most excerrent, Bronzini san."
"He didn't even ask me about the production."
"I tord you my presence was unnecessary. Your name arone open many door."
"Yeah, I noticed," Bronzini said dryly. "So we have the waiver. Can you get the guns to Yuma in time for the first day's shooting?"
Jiro Isuzu smiled tightly. "Yes, guns are in Mexican depot. Arrive from Hong Kong today. Easy to get across border now that waiver is certainty. Unrike tanks."
"Tanks?"
"Yes, we require many, many Chinese tanks."
"I didn't ask him about any tanks."
"Senator not one to ask, Bronzini san. Customs. We go there now. Prease to forrow."
Bronzini arrested the wiry Japanese by grabbing a handful of his coat collar.
"Hold on Jiro," he said. "We got a waiver on the machine guns only because I promised to export them when filming's over. Tanks are another matter altogether. I don't know if this is possible."
"You have used tanks in your firms before?" Isuzu said, prying Bronzini's fingers from his person.
"Sure, but I filmed Grundy III in Israel. The Israelis let me use all the tanks I wanted, but they're in a perpetual state of war over there. They're used to tanks in the streets. If you want to shoot tank scenes, I suggest we move filming to Israel."
"These tanks farse."
"Farce? Did we take a sudden turn into comedy?"
"Not farce, farse. Not real. Props. Customs men, once they see this, will happiry agree to their import."
"Oh, false! You really gotta work on your L's Jiro. It's gonna hold you back later on in life."
"Japanese take pride in not pronouncing retter L." He pronounced it "eru."
"We all have our crosses to bear. So where do we go from here-or do you want me to talk to the President while I'm in town? Maybe ask him to repeal daylightsaving time for the duration of production."
"You know American President?" Isuzu asked.
"Never met the guy. It was a little joke."
"Not see humor in terring rie," Isuzu said stiffly.