“I’ve never been to a ballet,” Liol admitted. “We’ve had troupes visit Ayacucho, but I didn’t think it would be quite me. Sorry.”
Neomone giggled. “Ballet is for everyone.”
“You should dance with him,” Dominique told her. “Let him see there’s nothing to be scared of from cultural йlitism.” She cocked an eye at Liol. “Neomone’s quite a fan of yours, you know.”
He grinned, slightly awkward. “Oh. Why’s that?”
“You flew in the Lady Mac ,” the girl said breathlessly. “Everyone knows Joshua was on a secret mission.”
“If you know, then it can’t be that secret, can it.”
“Told you he was a modest hero,” Dominique said. “In public, anyway.”
Liol managed to keep smiling valiantly. Maybe he had bragged a little. That was the nature of the starflight business. “You know how it is,” he shrugged.
Neomone’s giggles were unstoppable. “Not yet,” she said. “But I’m going to find out tonight.”
The beach glowed a pale silver under the light-tube’s lunar radiance. Joshua took his shoes off to walk along it, holding Ione’s hand. The sand was warm and soft, flowing over his toes like grainy liquid. Tiny fluorescent fish darted about just under the sea’s surface, as if a shower of pink and azure sparks were tumbling horizontally through the water. Somebody had made a row of small melted-looking mounds just above the shoreline, meandering away into the distance.
Ione signed contentedly, and leaned into him. “I know it’s silly, but I keep coming back. She loved playing on this beach. I suppose I’m expecting to find her here.”
“Jay?”
“Yes.” She paused. “And Haile. I hope she’s all right.”
“The Kiint say she is. They wouldn’t lie about that. Many things, but not the welfare of a child.”
“She must be so lonely.” Ione sat down with her back to one of the small dunes. She slid her silk scarf from her neck. “I don’t see why they won’t let us bring her back from Jobis. Starships are still going there.”
“Bloody mystics,” Joshua sat beside her. “Probably not in their horoscopes.”
“You’re starting to sound like dear old Parker Higgens.”
Joshua laughed. “I can’t believe that old duffer is coming with us. And Getchell as well.”
“They’re the best I’ve got.”
“Thanks for asking me to go. I need to be flying. I’m no good to anybody just sitting around.”
“Joshua.” She reached over to trace the stark line of his jaw bone. “I’m pregnant again. You’re the father.”
His mouth flopped open. She smiled, and kissed him gently. “Sorry. Bad timing. Again. I’m very good at that.”
“No,” he said with weak defiance. “No, that’s, er, not bad timing at all.”
“I thought you should know before you left.” Even in the twilight she could see the shock and wonder in his eyes. There was something absolutely gorgeous about him when he looked so vulnerable. It means he cares, I suppose. She touched his face again.
“Um. When?” he asked.
“Before you went to Norfolk. Remember?”
He grinned, almost shy. “We’ll never know the exact time then. There’s an awful lot to choose from.”
“If I had a choice, I think I’d make it the one in Adul Nopal’s apartment.”
“Oh Jesus, yes. The middle of his dinner party.” He flopped down onto the sand, and grinned up. “Yeah! That would be fitting.”
“And Joshua. It was very deliberate. I’m not in this state by accident.”
“Right. Thanks for consulting me. I mean, I thought we’d already established the next Lord of Ruin with Marcus.”
“Just say no.”
He put his hand round her head, and pulled her down, kissing her. “I think we’ve already confirmed I can’t.”
“You’re not angry with me?”
“No. Worried, maybe. More about the future than anything. But then the kid won’t have it any different to the rest of the human race when he dies. We can’t fear for that, or we’d be utterly paralysed. The Kiint found a solution, the Laymil, too—for all it’s inapplicable. We damn well can.”
“Thank you, Joshua.”
“I’d like to know why, though. I mean, we already have the next Lord of Ruin established.”
She closed her eyes, shutting out his gentle curiosity. “Because you’re perfect,” she whispered. “For me. Great body, good genes.”
“Little Miss Romantic.”
“And a wonderful lover.”
“Yeah, I know that bit. I carry the burden well, though.”
She laughed spryly, then she was crying helplessly.
“Hey. No.” He cradled her, hugging lightly. “Don’t do that.”
“Sorry.” She wiped a hand across her eyes. “Joshua. Please. I don’t love you. I can’t love you.”
He flinched, but didn’t recoil. “I see.”
“Oh God damn it. Now I’ve gone and hurt you. And I didn’t want that. I never wanted that.”
“What the hell do you want, Ione? I don’t understand. Don’t tell me this was convenience, that I was the male easily to hand when you happened to make your mind up. You wanted my baby. And now you’ve told me about it. If you hate me so much, you wouldn’t have done that.”
“I don’t hate you.” She gripped him tighter. “I don’t.”
“Then what?” He made an effort not to shout. Every emotion in his head was freefalling. Thought was almost impossible, only instinct, blind response. “Jesus Christ, do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?”