128515.fb2
Akase had come into her season. She knew after her last miscarriage that she might not survive another pregnancy. Ahadi was very demonstrative to her, even in public. But he knew that she could die during a pregnancy, and so his need for intimacy was not expressed in the usual way. Instead he looked for ways to enjoy closeness with her but not give in to his strong desires.
He soothed his need for her presence by lying his great mane down and letting her fall asleep resting on his side. He would kiss her, but always chastely. And he would tell her he loved her for who she was, and always would. That just being with her was the great joy of his life.
In this, Akase was little help. She was firmly in the grip of her natural inclinations. Her thoughts drifted back to all the blissful moments she had spent with her husband, and to the hopes and dreams they shared. Now they had no cubs. And worse, she was not even allowed to try!
“Husband,” she whispered. “Lover, come to me.”
“Call me husband, but do not call me lover.” Ahadi looked down, ashamed. “You are putting thoughts in my head.”
“Someone needs to.”
“We’ve been through this before. After your miscarriage, I thought we BOTH agreed that our marriage could last, but that we would be strong and face this thing rationally.”
“What you want isn’t a wife but a sister! If I must live as a sister, and never feel you close to me, I’d rather be dead!”
“Wife!”
“Lover!” She repeated it to make the point stick. “Lover, lover! That’s what I am--that’s what you married!”
“Don’t do this to me! I’m showing my love the best way I know how!”
“When I see you, I want you. But you say I could never have you, and you could never have me. Have you declared our marriage null and void?”
“No! I love you--God knows I do! I don’t want anything to happen to you!”
“But it is happening. Can’t you tell? This is not natural.” She rubbed him full length. “I may not become pregnant. It is always a risk, but one that I’m willing to take.”
“But darling!”
She nuzzled him, kissing him gently and passionately. “Make love to me, I beg you! Make love to me!”
“Oh gods!”
“Make love to me, husband. Lover, I know you want me. Let me hear you cry out my name in ecstasy!”
He looked in agony. He was. “Oh gods, I can’t endure this! Can’t you help me just a little?? Aiheu, help me!”
She nuzzled him. “Can’t he help ME just a little? I don’t want a miracle--I just want you.”
“For you, anything. But I feel guilty that it should please me too! I have no right to any pleasure that puts you in danger. If you died, my cries of passion would come back to haunt me like a curse! I would have to live with that for the rest of my life!”
“Never let that make you feel unclean! Never! Don’t you know that our pleasure is rooted in love? Love that will outlive these mortal bodies. Love that will make beautiful all that it touches! Love that will one day reunite us in the heavens! Come to me freely, because you love me!” She rubbed her face along his cheek. “I want to make you happy. I want to make you deliriously happy. I want to feel you shudder once more like a thunderbolt.”
“Oh gods!” He began to kiss her passionately. “I’m on fire!”
She walked a few paces in front of him and knelt down. Looking over her shoulder, she peered deeply his eyes and her jaw quivered.
He stalked toward her lithe, golden body, awash with the raging fever of his passion. “Lover, I come!”