I WOKE UP WITH THE SUN in my eyes. I blinked and for a moment I couldn’t remember where I was, couldn’t identify the boxy room with strips of sunlight slanting in on the two beds and the plain brown furniture.
But then I saw Kaz, adjusting the blinds, dressed in the jeans he’d had on yesterday and a worn gray T-shirt that fit him snugly, showing off the muscles in his arms and back.
Then I remembered.
“Good morning,” I said, stretching and yawning.
“Hailey.” Kaz turned from the window, took a step toward me. Stopped, looking self-conscious, and jammed his hands in his pockets. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up. I brought you some coffee. Bagels.”
“What time is it?” I ran my fingers through my hair, hoping that it wasn’t doing that sticking-up thing it had been prone to since Prairie had cut and dyed it pale blond.
Remembering that haircut brought all my guilt back. The makeover was only the first of many things Prairie had done to try to protect me.
“Nearly nine. You slept in.” Kaz picked up one of the coffee cups sitting on the desk, peeled back the plastic lid and handed it to me. I held it under my chin and let the steam bathe my face.
I was wearing only a thin tank top and my underwear. I pulled the covers up under my arms. I’d have to put my clothes on in the bathroom, maybe wait until Kaz wasn’t looking to get out of bed.
I felt my face get warm when I thought of his having spent the night just a few feet away. In a separate bed, but… still. We had taken turns in the bathroom, Kaz going first because he was faster, and when I’d come out after washing my face and brushing my teeth and combing my hair, he’d already been asleep, one arm thrown over his head, the other hand clutching the blankets to his chest. I thought it would take me ages to unwind enough to sleep. Prairie and Chub getting kidnapped, running from the scene, kissing Kaz, waiting in the lobby while he checked us in with the debit card-all of it had left me anxious and unsettled. But I didn’t remember a thing after getting into bed.
“How long have you been up?” I asked, taking a sip of the hot, bitter brew.
“A while,” Kaz said, and hesitated, like he wanted to say something more.
“What?”
“Nothing, nothing. It’s okay,” he said quickly. “But listen, Hailey, does Quadrillon mean anything to you?”
“Quadrillon?” I repeated, confused. “Yeah. It’s some sort of high-tech company. They built an office park out east of Gypsum when I was a little kid, back during the whole high-tech boom, because they got the land really cheap plus tax incentives or something. Quadrillon was supposed to move in first. Only that never happened. They went bust right before construction was finished and it’s been empty ever since. Sometimes kids go out there, break windows and drink or whatever, and the sheriff comes around. I guess eventually it’ll just fall apart and turn into a landfill.”
Kaz nodded, as though I’d confirmed a bad suspicion. “That’s where they took them. Where they took Chub, anyway. I saw it this morning, right when I woke up. The word Quadrillon, with a sort of squared-off four-leaf-clover logo. And then I realized it was a sign on a building. I saw Chub going in the door, over and over. He was with two guys in a car with black windows. Only, the building looks brand-new.”
“I don’t know how that’s possible,” I said slowly. “That building was run-down. Unless they could have fixed it up that fast…”
“All they would have had to do is lease it under some bogus name and get the power turned on and they could move in, fix up the place. They’ve had two months. That’s plenty of time.”
“You’re saying they’re in Gypsum…”
“It makes sense, Hailey. That’s where the other Banished are. If they’ve started up the lab again, they’re where they can get all the… research subjects they need.”
“The Seers,” I said slowly. “Rattler would provide the Seers. It might even have been his idea to set up there.”
The thought infuriated me: Rattler would be feeding the weaker Banished to the General in exchange for cash, all the while building his own new clan of purebloods.
“Speaking of Rattler…,” Kaz said. “What does he look like? Does he have longish brown hair, a scar on his forehead, a little shorter than me?”
“Oh no,” I whispered. “You saw him, too?”
Kaz turned away from me, blew out a long breath. “I woke up because I was having a migraine, Hailey. It happens when they come too fast, when the visions… take over.”
Only now did I notice that his hands shook slightly, that his face was pale and his jaw tight from the pain. “I’m sorry.”
“No.” Kaz shook his head. “This is good. This can help us. Now we know where to find them.”
“What was… Rattler doing? Was he at Quadrillon too?”
“I couldn’t tell, but he was… he looked really angry. He was hitting something with his fist. A wall or-I don’t know-a post or something. Over and over.”
“Oh.” I felt the fear deepen inside me. I’d seen Rattler angry before, but now I wondered who the target was-and given what I had done to him the last time I’d seen him, it could easily be me. As if we didn’t already have enough obstacles ahead of us. “You didn’t see Prairie? She wasn’t with Chub?”
“I don’t know. It wasn’t, you know, all that definitive. Hey, cheer up, Hailey,” Kaz said, forcing a smile. “It’s not all bad news. I got us a car.”
“What-how?”
“I went to see a friend from school this morning. A guy from the team. I had him come up here; then we drove to my car and switched. He said we can take it for a few days.”
“Kaz, you went to your neighborhood?”
“Don’t worry, my car was parked on the street. Nobody saw us.”
“But-” They could have, I thought. They could so easily have been watching the car. “What if they’d seen you?”
“But they didn’t. They didn’t, Hailey. Look, I know this is hard, and I’m sorry, I’m just so damn sorry to be taking these risks, putting everyone I care about in danger. But I don’t know what else to do.”
Because it had never occurred to him not to try. I felt my fear retreat a little. Kaz wasn’t reckless… only determined. And brave. And committed.
I tried to smile at him. “You must have been up for hours. And I didn’t even hear you get up.”
Kaz looked relieved that I was letting it go. “Nah, you were out. Woke me up with your snoring. I figured I might as well get out for a while.”
I felt my mouth drop open, my face flooding with embarrassment. I never snored-at least, Prairie had never said anything, or Chub for that matter.
Then Kaz grinned at me, that big slightly crooked grin, and I knew he’d been kidding.
“So your friend didn’t mind?”
“Getting stuck with my clunker?” His grin turned rueful. “He’s a good guy, Hailey. You’d like him. And it’s not like he traded me a BMW or anything. Don’t get too excited, his car isn’t a whole lot better than mine.”
“I wasn’t-I don’t care,” I protested. And I didn’t care, not about what kind of car we drove. As nice as it had been to drive with Prairie in the relatively new Camry, it was still a novelty to have a car at all. I had spent most of my first sixteen years riding the bus and walking. “I just, you know, does he know where you’re planning on taking it?”
Kaz raised an eyebrow at that and lowered himself to the other bed. He was close enough that I could smell soap on him, and his hair was still a little damp from the shower. So I’d slept through that, too.
“I told him we were going for a drive in the country.” He picked up one of the pillows and set it next to him, smacked it a few times. “You know, with cows and all.”
I couldn’t help smiling. “You say ‘cows’ like you’ve never seen one before.”
“I’ve seen plenty. After they’ve been made into burgers-”
I laughed. “Seriously? How close have you ever been to one?”
Kaz pretended to think. “Football field? A few hundred yards? They have some in the Lincoln Park Zoo, I think. Why, have you, like, petted them or something?”
“You don’t really pet cows,” I said, but it wasn’t entirely true.
Walking half a mile through the woods in back of Gram’s house took you to grazing acreage where Bud Eisle kept half a dozen head of black angus. I’d taken Chub there a few times once he was old enough to make the walk. I picked him up so he could put his hand on top of the cows’ velvety noses when they stood at the fence, chewing, showing only the faintest interest. It was before he could talk, but he loved to pet the soft muzzles.
But that wasn’t the kind of thing I could explain to Kaz.
“I can’t believe I’m going back there,” I said. “When I left Gypsum, I thought I’d never go back.”
“It won’t be forever,” Kaz said softly. He reached out for my hand, and I took his-and then suddenly it was the most natural thing in the world for him to tug me gently next to him. He kissed my hair and I let him draw me closer against him, until I could feel his heartbeat through his T-shirt.
This wasn’t like yesterday’s kiss. This was comfort, and a promise-that he would be there for me, with me. Prairie had made me such a promise. It had taken me a while to believe her-had taken a shared experience of danger, the blood bond of violence-but with Kaz, I simply knew.
He wouldn’t let me face what waited in Gypsum alone.
Maybe that was why I felt safe enough to say the rest. “You know I was… different there.”
Kaz murmured, “Yes,” tucking my head under his chin and holding me. I had told him about what it was like to live with Gram-the run-down house, the constant struggle to keep enough food on the table, the stream of drug-buying customers. I’d explained about the Morries-the kids from the Banished families who attended Gypsum High-and the meanness and poverty that defined their life in Trashtown.
What I hadn’t explained was where I fit into the high school: how I’d never had a best friend, or any real friends at all; how I’d been mocked and ridiculed for my clothes, my hair, my rusty bike; how the other kids had whispered about Gram, calling her a witch and worse.
I knew Kaz wouldn’t judge me for these things. But I was afraid that if I returned, I would lose the confidence that had come at a high price. I was afraid that even though I knew I had changed on the outside-the way I looked and dressed-I would stop believing I had changed on the inside.
“I don’t want to go back,” I whispered against his soft shirt.
“I know,” Kaz said. “But you won’t be alone.”