Charles was positively bursting with pride as Jane laid out her plan to retake the high ground in the war with the Crenshaw children. A day earlier, his bride-to-be had arrived at Netherfield just in time to say good-bye to Caroline and Louisa. It was their intention to be halfway to London before their sister’s children arrived. Caroline’s parting advice to Jane was not to sit down without looking, and Louisa leaned out the window to remind Charles to lock his door when he retired for the night. And with that, they made good their escape.
Part of the problem was apparent as soon as Jane was introduced to Mrs. Crenshaw. She was expecting, possibly six months along, and with half the day still ahead of her, she was already exhausted, and the children were prepared to take advantage of their mother’s fatigue. Unfortunately, for the youngsters, the servants had planned their own welcome. Instead of being free to run amok, they were marched out the back door by the three sons of Mrs. Smart, Netherfield’s cook, and into the park where Mr. Bingley’s grooms were waiting for them.
But they could be contained only for so long, and during dinner in the breakfast room and away from the china, the four oldest Crenshaws came in and immediately began eating off their mother’s plate and out of the fruit bowls in a foraging expedition. When they came to Jane’s plate, she placed a napkin over it and informed them that what they were doing was not foraging but plundering, the latter being an act of war, and she had no intention of yielding. After an attempt by their leader, Gaius, to stare Jane down had failed, the little savages returned to the park.
By the time Jane had arrived back at Longbourn, she already had a plan in mind. The crusade for the reformation of the Crenshaws began when their Uncle Charles herded Gaius, Lucius, Athena, and Darius into his carriage, leaving only toddler Minerva and baby Julian behind, for a trip to Longbourn.
After being escorted into the Bennet dining room by the two burly sons of Mr. and Mrs. Hill, the children found that each of them had been assigned a footman who had taken up his position immediately behind the chairs of the four children.
The battle was on when Gaius refused to use utensils. His plate was immediately removed by Adam Hill, and when he attempted to leave the table without being excused, John Jr. picked him up and put him back in his seat. When he tried again, Mr. Hill, who was standing guard at the door, pulled out a tether, and the defiant one sat down quietly and asked for his plate back.
“Not today, dear,” Mrs. Bennet said. “Only children who have minded their manners will have their dinner.”
Lucius, who usually followed Gaius in all things, decided to cooperate because he was hungry. Breakfast had been a bowl of “take it or leave it” porridge, which he despised. “I want food,” and he picked up his fork and knife to show that he would follow orders.
“Please. You must say please, Master Lucius,” Mrs. Bennet told the more compliant twin.
“Soldiers don’t say please,” he answered in a voice revealing just how insecure he was feeling.
“Are you an officer or an enlisted man?” Mr. Bennet asked.
“An officer.”
“Any officer in His Majesty’s Army would be regarded as a gentleman, and as such, would know the proper manners to use when dining.”
“Well, then, I am an enlisted man,” he said, even less sure than when he had been an officer.
“Enlisted men follow orders,” and after staring him in the eye, he continued, “or they are flogged.”
A wide-eyed Lucius politely asked for a plate, and an intimidated Athena and Darius followed his lead.
There was so much to accomplish in so little time, but victory was declared when all four children asked to be excused from the table, and it had not been necessary to tether any of them to their chairs.
“You must follow through at Netherfield, Charles, or today will have been for naught,” Jane said as she bid him good-bye.
“I shall see to it. I promise,” and added, “By God, Jane, you are going to make an excellent mother. Our children will be models for every child in the neighborhood.”
Jane guessed correctly that Gaius would organize a response in order to demonstrate his authority, and when the farmers and others traveling the road between Meryton and Watford reported especially aggressive squirrels pummeling them with acorns, the Crenshaw children were ordered out to the park to pick up the thousands of acorns that had fallen from centuries-old oaks, and when they finally waved the white flag and agreed to stop their pranks, Jane rewarded them with cake and punch.