A sound of moaning reached Lizzy’s ears before she reached 3 Island Street. The house was indeed in uproar!
Jane was waiting anxiously on the street for Lizzy’s arrival. The girls embraced with tears in their eyes, and Jane, between sobs, gave Lizzy a crisis update.
Mr Bennet, on hearing the dreadful news, had set off immediately to trawl the lap-dancing clubs of North Cornwall to try and recover his daughter. On hearing this, Uncle G bravely said he, too, would try and rescue his lost niece, and he also set off, some observers noted, in particularly good spirits, for the lap-dancing clubs of North Cornwall.
Meanwhile, Kitty was constantly crying because she wanted to go to Newquay.
“It’s so unfair. Lydia’s clubbing, and I’m crabbing.” Kitty just could not see the problem. “I don’t see what’s wrong with Newquay. Just because it’s common and everyone has raves on beaches and Lydia might be doing a bit of lap dancing—but I mean, what’s the difference wearing your bikini on the beach in the day or wearing your bikini in the evening and sliding down a pole?”
Mary wisely whispered to Lizzy, “This is a most unfortunate affair and will probably be much talked of. But we must stem the tide of malice and pour into the wounded bosoms of each other the balm of sisterly consolation.”
Lizzy thanked her sister and promised to exchange balm as and when necessary, then dashed upstairs to see her mother, who was lying in bed, moaning, “Newquay! Newquay! Of all the places in Britain, this is the hardest to bear. My poor Lydia, dragged as a sex slave into a lap-dancing club against her will by the villainous Wickham! Oh, it’s too much to bear.”
Too much to bear it was indeed. As Lizzy picked up the pieces of what was becoming known throughout Salcombe as “Polegate,” it emerged Lydia, at the point of throwing reputation to the wind, had left a message. A text had been sent to Colonel Forster’s wife.
Escaped to Newquay at last with my Wicky! Deffo better than Salcombe! Wicky got me a gr8 job. Says just need my bikini. That’s it! We’ll get loadsa tips and share them 50:50. My darling Wicky is so kind and generous. How my sisters will be green with envy!! lol. Lydia :-)
“Oh, thoughtless, foolish Lydia!” cried Lizzy. All that could be hoped now was that Mr Bennet and Uncle G would be able to bring the headstrong girl back before the sins of Newquay took their toll.