The following day, under flat grey skies, Lizzy and Jane were plodding slowly through the mudflats of the outgoing tide with only three great cormorants and a little egret for company, when they had a text from their father. “News!”
At once, the girls dashed through the mud, sending the peaceful birds squawking to the skies in panic and splattering themselves from head to toe in their anxiety to hear what their father had to say. Mr Bennet was sitting on the thwart in Angelica , which was aground, his mouth wide open and a puzzled look upon his face.
“Read it!” he said, passing Lizzy the phone.
The text was from Uncle G.
“Found her!”
“Awesome!” exclaimed Jane in delight.
“Searched all nightclubs, pubs, and exhausted myself in myriad lap-dancing clubs. Tracked Lydia and Wickham down at club called Tottie’s. Lydia signed up for three-year contract with severe penalties. By hook or by crook, contract paid off and Lydia and Wickham bribed with allowance at Fat Face. Accepted with alacrity.”
“Oh, splendid! Splendid!” cried Jane. “But, Father, why do you look so crazed at this fine news?”
“What does he mean by “by hook or by crook”? And as for “an allowance at Fat Face”? There must be at least White Stuff involved. And if so—how am I ever going to repay your uncle?”