DR. MCKENZIE’S veterinary practice was in an old building that had once been a private home. There were big trees, a kennel area in back and the reception desk sat in the middle of what Simon would guess had once been the living room.
“Montana Hendrix called,” he said as he rushed in. “I have Cece with me.”
Two women sat with a carrier in the waiting area. He ignored them, along with the kid holding a bowl with a fish, and rushed toward the older woman in a blue scrub shirt.
“Yes, Dr. Bradley. We were told you were coming.” She picked up the phone. “Cece is here.” She put down the phone and smiled. “Carina will be right up to get her.”
He nodded, but what he really wanted to do was start yelling. Right up? What did that mean? Why wasn’t this Carina person waiting to take Cece immediately? Although the dog continued to stare at him with love, he knew she was in pain. Her breathing came in pants and she moaned softly. He also didn’t like the angle of her leg. If it was broken, he would never forgive himself.
A blonde girl who looked like she was twelve came through a swinging door.
“Hi. I’m Carina.”
He wanted to growl he didn’t give a damn who she was, but held in his annoyance.
“Montana told you what happened?”
“Yes.”
She reached for Cece, taking her gently. Even so, the poodle yelped. Simon flinched. “Be careful.”
Carina gave him a patient smile. “We’ll take good care of her, Dr. Bradley. Cam… I mean, Dr. McKenzie is brilliant. If you want to give us a phone number where we can reach you—”
“I’m not leaving. I want to know exactly what’s wrong with her and what you’re going to do about it.”
Carina took a step back. “Um, okay. Sure. It may be a little bit. We might have to take an X-ray.”
“I would say that’s more than a might. Look at how she’s holding her leg. Are you a trained medical professional? Do you have any experience at all?”
Carina stiffened. “Yes, I do and perhaps this would go faster if you would let me do my job. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll take Cece in back. Someone will be out as soon as possible to let you know what’s going on.”
“Good.”
She turned and went through the swinging door. Cece strained to look around her arm, her eyes begging him not to abandon her.
He swore and ran his hands through his hair, then stalked to the receptionist. “I have to make a couple of calls. I’ll be right outside. Come get me if they learn anything.”
She nodded, looking completely unimpressed by his agitation. “Carina knows what she’s doing and, like she said, Dr. McKenzie is very good. Your little dog is going to be fine.”
“You actually can’t know that,” he growled, then stalked past the other waiting clients and went outside.
Once there he paced the path to the parking lot, then retraced his steps. A glance at his watch told him Cece had been in the back all of forty-five seconds and it was unlikely they would have found anything yet.
He phoned the hospital and talked to one of the nurses in the burn ward. After explaining that he’d been called away, he told them he’d have his cell with him for emergencies. Then he spoke to one of the nurses in recovery, and was relieved to find out Kalinda was doing so well that she was already on her way back to her room.
That taken care of, he shoved his phone into his pocket and continued pacing.
“KNOCK, KNOCK,” Montana called, walking into the back of the vet’s office. While Dr. McKenzie was new and she’d only met him once before, she was friendly with all his staff.
“Montana,” Carina said, coming up to her and giving her a hug. “What’s with Dragon Man?”
“Who?”
“The guy who brought in Cece. He’s the worst kind of pet owner. Terrified and angry at the same time. I thought I was going to have to muzzle him.” Carina’s eyes were bright with laughter as she spoke.
“He’s a doctor.”
“Oh, sure. I should have guessed that. He seemed like he wanted to be in charge.”
“I’m sure he’s more comfortable that way. How’s Cece?”
“Still with Cameron. Sally’s assisting. They’re doing an X-ray. We’ll have the results in a few.”
“Great. Thanks.”
“Want to stay back here? It’s safer.”
“No. I can handle Simon. If you’ll excuse the pun, his bark is worse than his bite.”
“If you say so.”
Montana walked toward the front of the building. Before pushing through the swinging door, she drew in a breath and told herself that whatever she felt when she saw Simon, she wouldn’t show it. This was a crisis and he’d called her because of Cece. He’d made his feelings about everything else very clear. Wanting him didn’t mean he wanted her back. She had to keep telling herself that.
She stepped into the reception area, only to find it empty.
“Looking for the guy who brought in the poodle?” the receptionist asked.
“Yes.”
“He’s out front. Pacing. Poor guy. He’s pretty frantic.”
Montana walked out the door and saw Simon at once.
Even though he wore a shirt and tie, he looked mussed. His thick hair was a mess, as if he’d been running his fingers through it.
He was tired, she thought, remembering that Kalinda was supposed to have had a major surgery today. Compassion and worry for him blended with her own pain at seeing the man she loved but couldn’t have.
“How is she?” he asked as he jogged toward her. “Have you heard anything?”
“They’re doing an X-ray right now. We’ll know soon.”
He swore. “I can’t believe what happened.” He told her about the toys and the drawer. “It’s my fault. She’s jumped like that before. I was irresponsible.”
She instinctively touched his arm, then wished she hadn’t. Heat flared between them. Heat that mocked her with its intensity.
“You weren’t. It was an accident. They happen. It’s not like you deliberately hurt her.”
“I should have closed the drawer.”
“Yes, you should have, but you didn’t. If her leg is broken, they’ll set it and she’ll heal.”
He shook his head and started pacing. “Is this what they go through? The good parents? I want to hit something. I want to rush into the examining room and take care of her myself.”
“I don’t remember you mentioning you went to vet school,” she said, keeping her tone deliberately light.
“You’re not helping.”
“Sure I am. To answer your question, yes, this is what those parents go through. Although they’ve loved their children for years and you’ve known Cece a few weeks, so it’s worse.”
She didn’t get into the dog-versus-child debate. That wasn’t the point.
If only, Montana thought as she watched him. If only he’d been able to care for her in return. Even a little. They could have been great together.
The front door opened and Cameron stepped out.
Montana had met him once before. He was in his early-to mid-thirties, tall, good-looking with dark wavy hair. Added to that, he loved animals and was raising his daughter by himself, so he was probably being stalked by most of the single women in town.
“Hi, Montana,” he said.
“Cameron.” She turned to Simon. “This is Dr. Cameron McKenzie. Cameron, Dr. Simon Bradley. The human kind of doctor.”
“Nice to meet you,” Cameron said, holding out his hand.
“You, too. How’s Cece?”
“She’s fine. Nothing’s broken. She pulled a muscle and scared herself. She needs to take it easy for a few days, which is tough with a dog. She’s already been given something for the pain and an anti-inflammatory. We’ll send both home with her, as well.” He glanced between them, as if not sure who would be responsible for the little dog.
Simon stepped forward. “She’s coming home with me.”
Cameron gave him the rest of the instructions.
Simon listened intently and nodded. “I’ll go back to my office and get her carrier,” he said.
“No problem. She’s pretty sleepy from the pain medication. Take your time.”
Cameron went back inside.
Simon turned to her. “Is it all right that she stays with me?”
“Sure. Let me know when you want me to get her. I can keep an eye on her while you’re at the hospital.”
He nodded. “Thank you for this. You didn’t have to help.”
“Of course I did. Not only is Cece my responsibility, I’m still your friend.”
His gaze locked with hers. “I hurt you, Montana. I’m sorry about that, but apologizing doesn’t justify what I said.”
Nor did it change the outcome. “You felt trapped.”
“You’re making excuses for me?”
“No, I’m saying I understand why you reacted the way you did. I knew the rules when we started.”
“I’m not sure that’s true.”
Stay, she thought, wishing begging would help. If only he would stay with her, be with her, love her back.
“Call me if you need anything,” she said, then turned back to the building.
She thought about offering to help him with Cece, but she knew what would happen if they spent the night together. She knew they would most likely give in to the ever present passion. And then what? Right now she needed to take care of herself and that meant protecting her heart.
So she did what was right rather than what she wanted and slowly, painfully, walked away.
MONTANA WATCHED AS NEVADA sat across from their mother in Denise’s cheerful kitchen.
“I did it,” Nevada said firmly. “I applied at Janack Construction. They have the last of their permits and have put out the word they’re hiring. I have an interview next week.”
Denise smiled. “You can stop looking worried. I’m not going to tell you this is a bad thing. You have to do what makes you happy.”
“But I’m leaving Ethan.”
“You’re not going to work for him anymore. There’s a difference. As you said, he’s more interested in his windmills, anyway.”
Nevada drew in a breath and smiled. “You’re not mad?”
“Of course not.” Her mother turned to Montana. “How are you doing?”
There was concern in her tone and sympathy in her gaze.
“You heard.”
“That you and Simon aren’t seeing each other anymore? Yes. I heard.” Her mother reached across the table and took her hand. “Anything I can do?”
“No. If I asked you to change Simon, you probably couldn’t. And even if you could, I don’t want him to be different. I love him the way he is.”
“That’s usually best. Women think they can change a man, but they’re often wrong.” Denise straightened. “Do you want me to talk badly about him or ask one of your brothers to beat him up?”
Despite everything, Montana laughed. “I’m good. He can continue life unscarred.” The laughter faded. “You know what I mean.”
“I do. I just want you to know I’m here for you.”
“Me, too,” Nevada told her. “Whatever you want. We can call him a jerk or worse, if you don’t want him beaten up.”
“Maybe next time.”
She couldn’t blame Simon for what had happened. As her mother had said, trying to change someone was a losing proposition. People changed because they wanted to, not because someone made them.
“On a more cheerful subject,” she said, turning to her sister. “I have someone you should meet.”
Nevada rolled her eyes. “You aren’t seriously considering setting me up with someone, are you?”
“Yes. You haven’t had a date in months.”
“Years is more like it,” Nevada grumbled. “I can’t find anybody I’m interested in. Or if I am interested, they’re in love with someone else.”
Montana blinked at her. “You’re interested in someone who’s married?”
“No. Don’t be an idiot. Of course not. I’m just saying that once, maybe, there was a guy…” She sighed. “It doesn’t matter.”
Montana glanced at her mother, who looked equally intrigued. She would have sworn she knew everything about Nevada’s personal life. Apparently she was wrong. Her sister had been keeping secrets.
Nevada leaned toward her. “Fine. Tell me about this guy you want me to meet.”
“His name is Cameron McKenzie. He’s the new vet in town. He’s tall, with dark wavy hair. Very cute. He moved here about a month ago. He took over Dr. Rivera’s practice. Rumor has it he has a daughter. She’s pretty young. Six or seven. Adorable, or so I’ve been told.”
“Where’s the wife?” Denise asked. “Kent has taught us all that the ex-wife is important to the equation. You’ll want to find out about her before you get involved.”
“I’m not involved.” Nevada slapped her hands on the table. “Mom, I haven’t even met the guy.”
“He sounds very nice.”
“Montana said he was cute, with a kid. How does that make him nice?”
“He likes animals.”
“Kill me now,” Nevada moaned. “Just make it quick.” She looked at both of them. “I can get my own guy.”
“I’m sure you can,” her mother said calmly. “The problem is you won’t. I want to see you happy.”
“I am happy.”
“You’re changing jobs and you don’t have anyone special in your life. Sell it somewhere else.”
Nevada turned her gaze on Montana. “Are you in on this?”
“I swear, it wasn’t planned. It just happened spontaneously.”
“Let’s try to keep that from happening again.”
Despite Nevada’s obvious annoyance, Montana grinned. “I’ll do my best.”
OVER THE NEXT WEEK, Simon braced himself for two events that never happened. The first was a final, hard push by the town to convince him to stay. The second was Montana “just happening” to show up in places where he would see her. Because she had to know that every time he looked at her, he wanted her with a desperation that nearly drove him to madness. Neither occurred.
He ran into Mayor Marsha twice, some women from the city council once and played golf with Josh, Ethan and Raoul Moreno, the former NFL quarterback who was married to Pia. No one mentioned that he was leaving or hinted at one reason why he should stay. Josh even asked about his next assignment, and the four men debated the merits of working in the States versus traveling to Pakistan.
He didn’t get it. He knew he would be an asset to the community, that the new hospital would have state-of-the-art facilities that would tempt any medical professional. Arranging to have patients come to him instead of the other way around added a layer of logistics, but was somewhat doable. He knew—he’d seen multiple presentations on the process over the years. Still, they were all silent on the subject.
He also hadn’t run into Montana anywhere. Once, leaving the hospital, he thought he caught sight of her turning the corner, but he wasn’t sure and by the time he’d reached the corner himself, she was gone. Although Cece showed up regularly in Kalinda’s room, Montana remained elusive. The one time he’d hung around until it was time for the dog to be picked up, he’d met her boss instead. Max Thurman had been the one retrieving the dog.
He’d gone so far as to question Reese, a regular visitor, about how his aunt was. The kid had blinked at him. “Which one?”
Simon had said it didn’t matter and walked away.
Not seeing her was even more difficult than seeing her all the time, he realized. At least when he was with her, he could lose himself in her presence. He could inhale the scent of her body, listen to whatever she was talking about, argue with her, make her laugh, touch her. When they were alone, he could make love with her, losing himself in her passion and healing himself in the process.
She was a part of him and being without her was as painful as cutting off an arm.
But he knew he had to keep moving, to heal, to push himself and to concentrate on the financial rewards of leaving and the emotional rewards of staying single.
But he wanted more.
He left his hotel Saturday morning, more because he was restless than because he had somewhere he needed to be. A little boy from Guatemala with a malformed face had had his last surgery the previous day and would probably be cleared to go home at the end of next week. Kalinda was getting ready for her next surgery, but in the meantime was happy and healing.
Everyone he treated, the burn victims, those in accidents and those simply born with differences, were managed, fixed or in the process of getting back to normal. He had nothing to do.
He walked toward the center of town, not surprised to find the area by the park set up for yet another festival. Crowds filled the sidewalk and spilled into the closed streets. The smell of barbecue and caramel corn filled the air.
From what he could tell, Fool’s Gold had festivals nearly weekly in the summer. Someone had told him about the Fall Festival, which was before the Halloween Festival but after the End of Summer Festival.
He’d been told he couldn’t miss the Saturday Day of Giving in December, and that the Live Nativity was always fun because the animals were real and last year one of the goats had eaten Mary’s gloves and then thrown up over everyone.
As he wove through tourists, he imagined the mountains covered with snow and then couldn’t help picturing Montana’s face softened by the glow of candles.
He paused to buy a hot dog from a vendor and overheard two women talking about the new construction project.
“It’s going to be huge,” one was saying. “A big, fancy hotel and casino. Shops, too.”
“I heard there might be an outlet mall. I’d love that.”
“My Frank is applying with Janack Construction. We’ve heard they’re a good company to work for.”
“That’s what Julia told me when I was getting my hair done. That’ll be a boost to the economy.”
He eavesdropped as he ate, then finished his soda and dropped the can into a blue recycling bin. He was about to head back to the hotel when he heard a whisper of sound. The faintest of laughters, but unmistakable, even in the crowd.
He turned slowly, searching for the source. Then he saw her. Montana was with her sister Dakota. While Dakota sat on a bench, smiling, Montana held her niece in her arms, laughing as she spun her round and round.
The baby grinned and waved her arms, obviously delighted. The sun touched Montana’s face, making her more beautiful than usual.
Simon stood rooted in place, staring hungrily, a starving man within sight of a meal. He soaked in the sounds, the way she moved, the vision of her with a child.
His child, he thought fiercely. He wanted Montana holding his child. No. Their child.
Longing washed over him and stole his breath. The need to be with her, not just for a few hours or days, but always. The craving was greater than anything he’d ever known.
He turned slowly, looking at the people at the festival, the families who took their happiness for granted.
Even as he started to walk toward her, he stopped himself. He couldn’t. He just couldn’t. Would he really sacrifice all he was, all he had, for a fleeting dream of happiness?
While those words had worked in the past, today he rebelled against them, wanting to take on those who determined his fate. Suddenly suffocated by the crowd, he hurried back to the hotel. He needed answers, he thought grimly, and he only knew one way to get them.
MONTANA KNEW SHE’D PUT OFF the inevitable for long enough. It was time to confess all and take her punishment.
Finding Mayor Marsha was relatively easy. She was at the festival with Charity and her new great-granddaughter. Montana admired the baby and then asked Marsha if they could talk for a second.
“Of course.”
The mayor led the way to a bench, her sleeping great-granddaughter still in her arms.
When they sat down, Montana angled toward her. “I’m sorry,” she began. “I failed. Simon is leaving.”
“My dear girl, I’m far more concerned about you. I heard the two of you weren’t together anymore. How are you?”
“I’m getting by.” If one considered living with a hole the size of Utah in one’s heart “getting by.”
“I miss him.”
“You love him.”
“Yeah, well, that wasn’t part of the plan, was it? You asked me to help convince him to settle in Fool’s Gold. Falling in love was my own fault.”
“Love is rarely a bad thing. I’m sorry for my part. If I hadn’t thrown you two together, none of this would have happened.”
“Don’t say that,” Montana told her. “I’m not sorry. Simon is an amazing man. Maybe I won’t get my happy ending, but I have wonderful memories of my time with him. I really liked being with him and who I was around him. He helped me see that all the choices in my life have led me to where I am. To where I belong. I’m hurting, but I’ll heal.”
“I know you will.” The mayor smiled at her. “You come from a long line of strong women. The women of the Máa-zib tribe were warriors.”
Montana laughed. “While I would love to claim them as ancestors, my family moved here. I’m not a descendant.”
“True, but their strength is all around us. The trees, the leaves, the very air carries their essence. You are one of them, Montana. They are very proud of you.”
The words should have frightened her. Instead she felt oddly proud and a little sniffly. “I hope so.”
“I know so.” Marsha smiled at her. “Now, don’t worry. I’m not getting senile or getting weird. I’m speaking the truth.”
Reese ran up to them. “Something’s wrong with Dr. Bradley,” he announced.
Montana was instantly on her feet. “What happened?” An accident? Had he been hurt?
“He’s gone crazy. People saw him running back to the hotel. He was talking to himself. Then he got in his fancy car and put the top down. He drove up the mountain and he was yelling at someone, only no one was there.”
“That can’t be good,” Marsha murmured.
Montana was already hurrying toward her house, where her car was parked. “I’ll go after him,” she called over her shoulder.
She had no idea what had happened, but if Simon needed her, she would be there.
SIMON DROVE UP the winding road easily, his Mercedes convertible hugging the curves. The sun beat down on him, mocking him with light and warmth. Rain would have been better, he thought grimly. A howling wind.
It had taken a few minutes to get out of town, what with all the tourist traffic. Once he got onto the mountain road, there were a few guys on bikes and no one else.
He knew exactly where he was going—to the meadow where Montana had taken him. A quiet place, spiritual, some might say. An excellent location for the final battle.
As he navigated each turn, his mind fought conflicting ideas. Trapped or protected. Stay or escape. He’d never questioned his choices before. Had never wondered.
The groundbreaking ceremony for the new hospital was only a few weeks away. He could be a part of that, if he wanted. Determine the direction, the focus. He could develop a program that was the best in the world, bring in other specialists, make a difference on an ongoing basis.
He could still travel a few weeks a year. Go somewhere remote—heal those without hope. He wouldn’t have to completely give that up. Other people would say it made sense.
He could stay here, have a home, a life. He could be a part of something and belong.
He drove higher and higher, finally pulling off onto a dirt road that led to a clearing, where he parked his car and got out. He walked through the dense trees and bushes, not sure where he was going until he broke free and was in a clearing.
He walked to the center and stared up at the sky.
“I won’t do this anymore,” he yelled. “I won’t be held hostage. I’ve worked hard—harder than most. I deserve this. I deserve to be happy. You hear me? You hear me?”
His words echoed around him, followed by the sound of thrashing in the woods. He half expected to be attacked by a mountain lion or wolf, but eventually the sound faded and Simon was alone.
He closed his eyes.
He couldn’t keep doing this, he thought wearily. He couldn’t keep walking away. Especially not this time. Not from the town or his patients, and not from Montana.
“I won’t give her up,” he said, opening his eyes and raising his arms to the heavens.
He stood there waiting, knowing he would be struck down. Perhaps by lightning, perhaps by something else.
There was only silence. The sky remained clear and blue, the air warm.
He heard more rustling and turned to see Montana breaking through the brush. He dropped his arms to his side.
“What are you doing here?” he asked.
“That’s my question. You know, you’re frightening the hikers. Try not to do that. We need the tourist revenue.”
She crossed to him, her expression concerned. “Want to talk about it?”
“I’m not crazy.”
“I have witnesses who would testify otherwise.”
Her brown eyes never wavered. He read the love there, and the certainty. He thought about all she’d given him, how she trusted him, believed in him. How she didn’t see the scars anymore.
He swore, then ripped off his shirt. The sun beat down on him, illuminating the ugliness that marred his chest and back. He took her hand in his and pressed it to his heart.
“This is who I am. I will never be perfect, never be like everyone else. I’m only as good as the work I do and if I lose that…”
She took both his hands in hers. “You’re not defined by what you do. While your work is extraordinary and a gift, it’s not who you are. You will always be defined by what is inside of you. Your strength, your determination, your relentless pursuit of the best for your patients. You’re a good man with a heart so big, you’ve been afraid that if you opened it up, even a little, you would be swallowed whole.”
She smiled gently. “I have a secret to tell you. Love doesn’t make you weak. It makes you strong. Stronger than you’ve ever imagined. You’ve spent your whole life in the service of others. Maybe it’s time to have a little something for yourself.”
Her words were like a swollen river, carrying him along and throwing him up against the rocks. He felt battered and broken, taunted by what he could never have because… Because…
He remembered his mother and the fire and his fear and the smell of his own flesh burning. He remembered the pain and seeing his face for the first time, knowing he would always be a monster. And he remembered shutting himself off then. Vowing no one would ever hurt him again.
He’d locked himself away because it was safe. He’d built his own prison and he held the key in his hands. Or perhaps in his heart.
He thought of Alistair—the pain his friend had faced—and knew Alistair would do it all again. Face it all, just for a minute in his wife’s presence. That was love.
“Montana,” he said, dragging her against him. “Montana, I’m sorry. I was wrong. What I said, how I treated you.” He drew back so he could see her face. “I love you. I have from the first. You’re the best part of me. You are the light to my dark and without you, I’m blind. I’ll give you anything, if only you’ll stay with me.”
Tears filled her eyes. “I’ve only ever wanted you. I love you.”
For the first time in his life, he allowed himself to believe the words, to feel them. They washed over him, healing wounds long forgotten.
“I love you,” she whispered again and kissed him. “I love you, Simon.”
“I love you, too.” He clutched her shoulders. “I’ll stay here in Fool’s Gold. Is that what you want? I’ll ask for a job on the hospital staff and set up a program. I’ll still need to travel every now and then, but I can do most of my work here. Is that okay?”
She laughed through her tears. “Yes. It’s wonderful. I’m hanging on to you and never letting go. That’s going to make it hard for you to work, but you’ll figure it out.” She hugged him again. “I’m never letting go,” she repeated.
He returned her embrace, knowing they belonged together. That he had been given a powerful and unique gift—Montana’s love. As her mother had told him, he was a lucky man.
He could see what their future would be like and he knew everything before had brought him to this moment. He’d been given the chance to make the most amazing woman in the world happy. He would spend the rest of his life making sure that happened.
“You want kids, right?” he asked.
“I want your kids.”
He kissed her then, putting all his heart into the moment, then picking her up and spinning her around. They both laughed, the sound echoing off the mountains and drifting across the valley.
In the hospital, down in Fool’s Gold, Kalinda smiled and held Cece close. Everything was going to be just fine.