LORI WAS BOTH excited and nervous as she climbed the stairs. She was pretty sure she knew what Reid had in mind- the concept if not the details. While she was thrilled at the thought of being with him again, she wondered how this time would be different from the last. Before she'd been totally swept away by the moment. Now she was not only aware of what they were going to do, but she had her own growing feelings to contend with.
Making love now would probably send her into a female frenzy of bonding. Did she want to take the chance of connecting more? Did she have a choice?
She reached Reid's room before she'd decided. The door stood partially open and she stepped inside.
She was met by soft, seductive music, lit candles everywhere and the man of her dreams walking toward her. As he took her in his arms and kissed her, she knew the answer to the question was no, she didn't have the strength or the will to walk away from him. She was going to play this to the end. If she got hurt, she would deal with the pain.
"I didn't think you'd ever get here," he said as he kissed his way down the side of her neck.
She wore a long-sleeved shirt. He unfastened the first couple of buttons, then pushed the fabric off her shoulder so he could kiss her there.
"I have chocolate wine and chocolate-dipped strawberries," he murmured against her skin. "Prepare to be seduced."
"Chocolate wine?"
"You'll love it," he said. "Trust me."
Her mind and her body fought for her attention. On the one hand, it was impressive that the original Mr. "I take a woman who is willing and does the asking" had put himself out there. On the other, the warm brush of his lips made her not really care about anything else.
He straightened and pulled her into his arms. They began to sway to the music, a sexy, sultry Norah Jones song that had a beat built in desire.
Reid kept one hand on the small of her back and slipped the other through her hair, then he kissed her.
His mouth was warm and demanding. She parted for him. He slipped inside, his tongue brushing hers in a way designed to excite her. His body was hard and unyielding, already aroused. The feel of his erection against her belly sent heat and need spiraling through her.
He wanted her. He wanted her. Impossibility battled with reality and reality won. She threw both arms around him and abandoned herself to the moment.
She kissed him with all she had, meeting him stroke for stroke, then closing her lips around his tongue and sucking. He stiffened, his arousal pulsed, then he nipped her bottom lip and pulled back.
"How about the chocolate wine?" he asked.
She opened her eyes. "Not necessary."
"But I have the whole seduction planned. Especially the chocolate part."
Which was sweet. He'd obviously gone to a lot of trouble. She appreciated the gesture. "Seriously, later, I'll be all over that chocolate wine. But not right now."
She stepped back and toed off her shoes. After pulling off her socks, she dropped her jeans, then tossed them onto the sofa. She moved up against him, took his hands in hers and put them on her butt…the very butt left bare by the thong she was wearing.
His breath caught. He squeezed her curves, then eased one hand around to her hip. He pushed the scrap of silk down her legs and she stepped out of it. Then he slipped his fingers between her thighs and began to touch her with an expertise that took her breath away.
He found her center and began to tease it, moving slowly around the heart of her desire, but not quite touching it. He did that again and again, until she was close to begging. She stood, her legs parted, her hands on his shoulders, needing him to keep her balanced and at the same time wanting him to rock her world. Just when she was about to give in and shove his hand into place, he slipped a single finger inside of her and pressed his thumb exactly where she needed him most.
Sensations rippled through her. Tension rose as muscles tensed and her breathing increased. He knew exactly how to do that, how to circle and rub and excite. It was as if he had been hard-wired into her brain and could feel what she was feeling.
With each second he touched her, she moved closer to her orgasm. There was no ebb and flow, no reaching and hoping. It was just a steep, slick, wet, downhill slide to paradise. She dug her fingers into his shoulders and prayed her trembling legs continued to support her. She supposed she could have suggested they move things to the sofa, but she didn't want to break the mood of the moment. Not when she was already so close.
"Look at me," he whispered.
Startled, she did as he requested, opening her eyes and staring into his.
Fire lurked there. Bright, hot need that excited her more.
"I like doing this," he said, his voice low and heavy with his own need. "I like touching you, arousing you. I like how wet you are and how I can feel you shaking. I like everything about your body. The softness of your skin, the way you start to contract even before you're totally over the edge. I want you, Lori. I want you bad."
His erotic words quickened her breathing. She started to close her eyes, but then forced them to stay open.
"Come for me."
It was more of a request than a command, but it was enough. She crashed over the edge, her body convulsing in perfect pleasure. He kept his thumb on her even as he mimicked the act of love and thrust two fingers inside of her, in and out. Contractions shuddered through her and she groaned out her surrender.
She had barely come back to reality when he leaned in and kissed her. She kissed him back and savored the feel of his body against hers. This was only the beginning, she thought happily as he unfastened the last few buttons on her shirt, unhooked her bra and tossed both on the floor. Then his hands were on her breasts.
He cupped her curves before touching the very tip of her tight nipples. After a couple of seconds, he broke the kiss and bent his head so he could take her right breast in his mouth.
He sucked deeply, pulling at her skin while his fingers caressed her other breast. The connection between her sensitive breasts and her still throbbing center strengthened. She felt each stroke, each lick, each circle of his tongue deep inside. Despite the extraordinary orgasm of a minute or two ago, she found herself getting aroused.
Suddenly she wanted him naked. She wanted their bodies pressed together, joining and staying that way until they were both exhausted. She tugged at his sweater.
"Get your clothes off," she insisted. "Now."
"I like it when you're bossy," he said with a grin, then obliged her request. His feet were already bare so all that was required was for him to pull off his sweater, jeans and briefs. Then she could see all of him.
He had a perfect body, she thought as she walked around him, touching whatever interested her most. His shoulder, his back, the curve of his butt.
She did what he had done that first time they'd made love. She snuggled up behind him, pressing her body against his and began to touch him everywhere.
He was too tall for her to see over him, so she closed her eyes and imagined what he looked like. She explored his chest, paying particular attention to his nipples. She stroked them, then squeezed them. He groaned softly. At the same time she trailed kisses across his back, punctuating them with little, soft nips.
She moved her fingers lower, down his flat belly, then out to his narrow hips. She brushed across his muscled thighs, before taking him in both hands.
He was hard- that always unexpected male combination of impossibly rigid flesh encased in the softest of skin. She explored his length, then circled the head, running her fingers along the sensitive underside before returning to the base and dipping her fingers to explore his testicles.
She wanted him as much as she'd ever wanted anyone. Okay, if she was going to be honest, she wanted him more. She wanted him inside of her, taking her, claiming her.
There it was- her secret truth. She wanted to be claimed by this man. Nothing between them but naked flesh and desire. And hearts, she thought, emotions welling up inside of her. She wanted him to care with a desperation that took his breath away.
The longing, deeper and more powerful than any she'd ever known, threatened her arousal. So she pushed it away to be dealt with another time. She dropped her hands, moved around to stand in front of him and kissed him.
He responded like a starving man. He kissed her hard and hot, touching her everywhere. He also began nudging her backward, toward the bedroom.
His hands were on her breasts, between her legs. Frantic, urging and she soon found herself just as eager. Then she was on the bed. There was a second's delay as he slipped on a condom, then he was inside of her, filling her, taking her with an intensity that gave her no choice except to give herself to him and enjoy the ride.
"DISASTER," Dani said as she sank into the chair opposite Gary's at The Daily Grind. "It was a total disaster. I loved everything about the place. Valerie was great, her staff was charming and happy. Martina, the chef, is someone I would love to work with."
"So how was it a disaster?"
Dani glanced around, wanting to make sure no one from Valerie's Garden happened to be lurking in the area, then spoke in a low voice.
"The food was hideous. Seriously awful. I hated everything. Even the iced tea. Apparently I don't have an upscale vegan palate. If only they'd given me a regular cheese quesadilla, I would have signed up in a heartbeat. Or if it had been nearly any other kind of food. Even if I'd only sort of liked it, I probably would have tried to make the job work, but I'm telling you. What they served bordered on nasty."
Gary chuckled. "They probably won't want you in their ads."
"Probably not. I'm seriously bummed. Why did it have to be like this? I feel like Goldilocks. So far, nothing is exactly right."
Gary reached across the tiny table and patted the back of her hand. "You'll find something. I know you will."
"I hope so," she grumbled, even as she tried to figure out what she felt about him touching her.
"I'll keep looking," she said. "I'm determined to further my career. I'm getting calls, so that's good. I just have to be patient."
"That's the attitude," he said. "Did you talk to the private investigator?"
"Yes. Thanks for giving me her name. She's great and we got along, but she said without some more information, she can't help me."
Dani wasn't surprised. She knew absolutely nothing about her father except for the fact that at one time he'd existed.
"I haven't got a clue about him," Dani said. "No name, no address, not even a description. I've asked my oldest brother Cal if he remembers anything but he doesn't. He was pretty young and I'm sure my mother was careful to keep him away from the man she was having an affair with."
Gary pulled back his hand and took a sip of his coffee. "What about papers from your mother? Letters? Notes? A date book?"
All good ideas, she thought. "I don't know of anything like that. I'll ask my brothers, but I don't hold out too much hope. There's only one person who might know something and getting her to talk would take a miracle."
"They happen."
"Not in my world."
Gloria? Help her? Her brothers swore the old woman had changed, but was it enough? Gloria had made it clear she loathed Dani.
"I don't want to give her the pleasure of going to her and asking," Dani said flatly. "She doesn't deserve it."
"What do you deserve?" he asked. "If there's a chance of getting what you want, isn't that worth an awkward conversation?"
She smiled. "Oh, sure. Be rational."
"I'm a math teacher. What did you expect?"
She sighed. "I know you're right. I just can't stand the thought of going begging, which means you're going to say then I obviously don't care enough about finding my father."
She drank more of her coffee. "Maybe I'll talk to Reid. He's living in Gloria's house and spending the most time with her. If he says she's really willing to help, then I'll ask."
"Now you have a plan."
She looked at him. "You think I should go face the dragon."
"Our fears get bigger than they should be if we don't see them in the light of day."
"That would be the theology teacher speaking," she said.
"Maybe, and a little of the man."
"We never talk about your life very much," she said, realizing she didn't know that much about him. "You're very good at asking questions."
"I'm very interested in your life," he told her. "My days are often similar."
"And I'm living in the middle of a soap opera. I'm thrilled to know I can at least entertain my friends."
"We appreciate it," he said lightly, then leaned toward her. "Dani, would you like to go to dinner with me sometime?"
He was asking her out. She'd wondered if he would and how she would feel about the invitation. But now that it was here, there was no sense of panic or the need to avoid taking things to the next level. Gary was a great guy. She really liked him. He was kind and honest. The total lack of physical chemistry might be a good thing. She'd been burned by passion enough lately.
"I would love to go to dinner with you," she said.
REID WAS FEELING LIKE pretty hot shit. It was sunny and relatively warm, he'd decided what to do with his life and last night he'd seduced the hell out of Lori. He hadn't taken what was offered, he hadn't gone along with what was easy. He'd planned the evening, reduced her to a puddle and then he'd made her scream.
He liked knowing he could do that to her. He also liked that there was no pretending. He could read her body nearly as easily as he read his own and he knew exactly how to please her. Being with her made him feel good. He found himself wanting things he hadn't thought about in a long time.
The realization should have scared the crap out of him. Instead he found himself thinking about the future. Playing a serious round or two of "what if."
What if he didn't walk away from Lori? What if things developed between them? What if she fell in love with him?
He knew she liked him. Not just the crush she'd admitted to, but real liking. She wouldn't have slept with him otherwise. He wanted to take credit for her physical transformation, but he knew it had very little to do with him. She'd used him as the excuse, but in truth she'd wanted to make a change for a long time. Lori wasn't comfortable hiding anymore. It had just taken a while for her outsides to figure that out.
But could she fall in love with him? Was she willing to take that ultimate risk? He knew that on the surface he was a great catch. Healthy, good-looking and rich. But what about on the inside? He'd never committed to a woman in his life. He'd only offered once. As Lori had pointed out, he'd then used that moment as an excuse to stop trying.
That wouldn't be enough for Lori. She had high standards and he wondered if he could measure up.
He poured more coffee from the pot on the credenza, then turned back to the stack of letters on his desk. He'd pulled out the ones that bothered him the most and had gone over them again. He had to be able to do something for these kids.
One caught his eye. The one from the boy whose twin brother had died. Reid had grown up close to Walker and Cal. His brothers, along with Dani, had meant everything to him. If something had happened to one of them…
He picked up the phone and dialed the number on the letter. A woman answered.
"Mrs. Baker?"
"Yes."
"Good morning. My name is Reid Buchanan. I used to play baseball."
"What? Oh. Really? I know who you are. My son is a huge baseball fan. The sport and the players are his world. Even more so since…well, recently. He hated to see you retire. He talked about it for days."
If the kid knew Reid had screwed up his career himself, he would think a lot less of him.
"Mrs. Baker, your son wrote me about your loss. I'm terribly sorry."
There was a moment of silence followed by a strangled, "Thank you. It's been difficult."
"I can imagine. I was thinking about what I could do for Justin. To take his mind off of things for a little while. I have some friends on the Seattle Mariners and I've been talking to their general manager. How would you and Justin like to spend a long weekend with the team at spring training? You'd be flown down first-class, put up in a nice hotel. You'd have a car and a driver at your disposal, along with money for meals. The hotel has a spa. You'd have free use of the facilities. I'd make sure there was someone to keep an eye on Justin while you were relaxing."
He heard her breath catch. "I don't know what to say," she admitted. "Why would you do this?"
"Because I can. You and Justin have already been through too much."
"You're being incredibly generous," she said quietly. "I don't know what to think."
"I would very much like you to let me do this for you. If you need a little time to think it over, then let me give you my phone number. You can call me back."
She gave a little laugh. "Mr. Buchanan, I might have trouble getting through the day, but I'm not totally crazy. Justin would love this and honestly, so would I. Of course we'll go. Thank you."
"You're welcome. I'm going to have a travel agent call you in a couple of hours. She'll make all the arrangements. But I want you to take my personal number as well. If you have any trouble, anything at all, you call me."
"This is amazing. Thank you."
"Just take your boy and have a good time."
"We will."
They hung up. Reid leaned back in his chair and stared down at the list of arrangements that had to be made. While the travel agent he'd spoken with had promised to stay on top of things, he knew he would be calling around and checking himself. He didn't want another repeat of the no return tickets disaster.
He pulled out a pad of paper and added to the ongoing list. If the foundation wasn't going to have an in-house travel agent, then he wanted to make sure there was someone who would follow up on the arrangements made. There weren't going to be any more screw-ups on his watch.
LORI ARRIVED HOME shortly before five and saw a familiar car in the driveway. She pulled into the garage, closed the door behind her and walked into the kitchen. She could hear Madeline and her mother laughing in the living room and her stomach clenched.
She didn't mind that her sister invited people over- this was Madeline's house, too- but why did it have to be their mother? No matter how the evening went, Lori always ended up feeling like the odd one out.
"Hi, I'm home," she called as she walked into the kitchen and set her purse on the counter.
"We're in the living room," Madeline called. "Come join us."
Lori stood in the kitchen and wished for an excuse to escape to the quiet of her room. If only Reid had wanted to seduce her tonight. But he hadn't been around when her shift had ended and she hadn't been comfortable calling him on his cell to find out his plans. They might be physically involved, but she didn't know or understand the parameters of their relationship. She had a feeling that answers were only a conversation away. But she was afraid to ask.
Talk about dumb, she told herself. She should be willing to ask what he was thinking and explain her own needs and desires. She prided herself on being a take-charge person, and she was. Everywhere but with Reid and her mother.
Evie walked into the kitchen and smiled at her. "Hi, Lori. Did you have a good day?"
"Yes, thanks. Gloria is doing better and better. I'd been concerned about how she would heal, but she's moving forward all the time. She should be back to her regular life in a couple of months."
"That's good."
Her mother linked arms with her and dragged her into the living room, then forced her onto the sofa and settled next to her.
"Your sister and I have a confession," Evie said, then looked at Madeline and they both burst out laughing.
Lori glanced between them, not getting the joke. "What happened?"
Madeline waved her hand in the air. "It's not a bad thing," she said, barely able to speak between gasps of laughter. "Unless you're the chicken."
That set them off again. Lori tried to be patient, even though she felt a powerful need to scream. What was so damn funny?
"We were supposed to have chicken for dinner," Evie said as she wiped at her eyes. "I came over to help Madeline get things started. We were seasoning the chicken. It was wet and slippery and it went flying across the room."
She started to laugh again and couldn't stop. Lori could see how an unruly chicken could be humorous, but this was a little extreme.
"Okay," she said slowly. "And?"
Madeline pressed a hand to her chest. "I picked it up and when we were washing it off, it got away from us again. That chicken was determined not to go in the oven."
"It's true," her mother said. "We dropped it twice more, but we finally got it seasoned and in the pan. We put it in the oven and came in here to recover. Then about five minutes before you got home we realized- " She erupted in laughter.
Madeline joined in, then gasped. "We forgot to turn on the oven."
This set them off again. Lori tried to figure out the humor of forgetting to turn on the oven. Apparently it was one of those moments that had to be experienced in real time.
"The thing is," her mother told her. "You would never have forgotten. That's what I was telling Madeline when you came home. You were always the solid one, Lori. Not flaky like your sister and me."
Lori held back an automatic protest that her sister wasn't flaky.
Her mother's laughter faded. "Oh, Lori, you were such a good little girl. I could depend on you to take care of things. In my sober moments, I used to think that wasn't a good thing. Not that I blamed you. You're the only reason we all survived. But with you around, I didn't have to worry about what was happening at home. It was all taken care of."
Lori didn't know what to say to that. Her recollections were similar but she'd never thought of them in the context of holding the family together. She'd done what needed to be done because her mother was always drunk and Madeline was busy with her life.
"I remember Lori nagging me to eat," Madeline said. "Or at least eat better than I was."
"She did the same with me," Evie added. "I can see that sweet little girl, standing in the kitchen, holding a big pot and yelling that we were all going to sit down and eat together, even if she had to physically make us."
Lori felt a rush of memories, most of them bad. She pushed them away, as she always did, but her mother kept talking about how much Lori had done.
"I would have been lost without you," Evie said. "Have I told you that? It's true."
Lori felt incredibly uncomfortable. She and her mother didn't get along. Bonding wasn't allowed. "I didn't do that much."
"Of course you did. Part of recovery is acknowledging what the alcohol did to your family. In your case, Lori, my drinking forced you to grow up too soon. You became the mom. I never wanted that."
Lori squirmed in her seat. "It's fine," she murmured, wishing they could talk about something else. She didn't want to hear any of this.
"It's not fine," her mother said. "I wish things had been different." She frowned. "Where are your glasses? Did you get contacts?"
"She had Lasik surgery," Madeline said, sounding smug. "Isn't she beautiful?"
"She'll never be as pretty as you," her mother said.
The comment made Madeline grimace, but helped put Lori's world back in perspective.
"Eye surgery?" Evie asked. "I didn't think you'd want to do something like that."
"I can't wear contacts," Lori said. "I tried and there's just no way. Now I don't have to worry about glasses."
"Is there a man?" her mother asked bluntly. "Women always do stupid things for a man."
Lori distinctly remembered wishing for a change in topic. Now that it was here, she was having second thoughts.
"I didn't do it for a man," Lori said firmly. "I like being able to see without glasses."
Her mother looked unimpressed.
Lori hated sounding like she'd changed herself for Reid. He'd been the catalyst but not the reason. "Okay, fine. I am kind of seeing someone. It's nothing."
"It's not nothing," Madeline said. "It's fabulous and so is he. Remember Reid Buchanan? He's that hunky baseball player who blew out his shoulder last year and had to retire."
"I don't remember that," Evie told her. "But wasn't there a mean article about him in the paper recently? Something about him not being…" Her mother's voice trailed off.
Lori didn't know what to say. This was a true definition of damned if you do and damned if you don't. "It wasn't true," she said at last. "Not any of it."
"I see."
Evie and Madeline exchanged a look. Lori didn't want to know what either of them were thinking.
"He's great," Madeline said. "He adores Lori."
"I'm glad." Evie smiled. "It's time you found someone."
Lori supposed life was never all one way and neither were people. Evie was trying. Failing, but trying.