The days passed quickly, yet as happy as I was that it had finally arrived, I was scared. The nightmare had returned over the last few nights and I was worried something would go wrong and I’d never have the happy-ever-after I wanted so desperately. I wouldn’t feel safe until he was in my arms tonight and we passed the point of no return.
I waited nervously with Giorgio for the wedding march to begin.
He patted my arm and smiled warmly, “I never thought my son would fall in love, but you changed all that Annalisa and I don’t think he could have found anyone more perfect.”
I smiled with quivering lips. I was afraid to speak and give reason for the waiting tears to roll down my cheeks.
He pressed the back of my hand to his lips, “Be happy together.”
The wedding march began and it was time to go. He offered his arm. I laced mine through his and took one long breath and then began to move toward my future, toward my forever, toward the person I loved more than life, Micah.
The chapel was bathed in candlelight, guests filled the room, and waiting for me at the end of the aisle was the most beautiful man in a traditional black and white tux. I kept telling myself not to cry, but with every step I took, I could feel the tears building. I knew there were people present that I should have taken notice of, but I couldn’t see anyone besides Micah.
We reached the end of the aisle and Giorgio kissed my cheek through the veil and took his seat with Celeste.
Pastor Anderson from our Palm Beach church began, “Friends and relatives, we have come here this evening to share the joy of the wedding between Micah and Annalisa. Tonight is an outward expression of their love and devotion toward one another. They seek God the Father to unite them in this sacred relationship of marriage and ask you to witness this blessed event. Who here gives this woman to be married to this man?”
My mother stepped up beside me, “I give her to Micah with my blessing,” she stated and then took one step to the left.
He turned to us and continued, “The Marriage ceremony is one of the first and oldest ceremonies in all the world, performed in the presence of God, and is a gift that divides our sorrows and doubles our joys in life. This is a joining of hands, a blending of hearts, a uniting of lives not by the strength of the state nor the certificate of marriage, but by the strength and power of the faith and love you have in one another. Please turn and face each other and join hands.”
I handed my bridal bouquet to Mom and then turned to Micah and slipped my trembling hands into his warm, steady hands. I suddenly found myself smiling, laughing on the inside. Damn hit man, I thought, always steady under pressure and I’m about to fall apart. He looked at me and returned the smile. I wondered if he could possibly know what I was thinking.
“Micah, please repeat this vow to Annalisa, saying after me: I Micah…”
For me, Pastor Anderson’s voiced faded away and all I could hear was Micah.
“I Micah take you, Annalisa, to be my wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, I promise to love and cherish you forever.” Forever wasn’t something that Pastor Anderson stated, but I’m glad Micah added it to the vow because he knew all along I wanted forever so badly with him.
And then I repeated my vow to him, my voice remarkably steadier than I felt on the inside. “…I promise to love and cherish you forever,” I finished.
Pastor Anderson continued, “The Word of God defines for us what true love really is and what it does: Love is patient, love is kind, love is not jealous; love doesn’t boast and is not arrogant, it does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, it is not provoked, and it does not take into account a wrong suffered, nor does it rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; for love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things, but above all, love never fails. Is this the love you share?” he asked.
“It is,” we answered together.
“Then, having committed this kind of love to one another, you have chosen to exchange rings as the sign and seal of the promises you are making today. Micah, do you have the ring for Annalisa? May I have the ring?”
David handed the ring to Micah and Micah placed it in the pastor’s open hand.
“Annalisa, do you have the ring for Micah? May I have the ring?”
Mom handed me the ring and I placed it into the waiting hand.
“The rings,” he continued, “are a significant token and symbol of this love that you share. They are made of precious metal and stone, reminding us that love is not cheap nor common; but is in fact a very costly and dear thing. They are made in a continuous circle signifying that we must keep love continuous throughout our whole lives. As you wear these rings, whether you are together or apart, may these rings be a constant reminder of the promises you are making to one another this day.
“Micah will you please take this ring and place it upon the third finger of Annalisa’s left hand, and holding her hand in yours, please repeat this promise to her, saying after me:…”
Micah held my hand warmly as he slid the ring onto my finger and stated, “With this ring, I seal my promise to be your faithful and loving husband, as God is my witness.”
“Annalisa,” Pastor Anderson said, handing me Micah’s ring, “Will you please take this ring and place it on the third finger of Micah’s left hand, holding his hand in yours, please repeat this promise to him, saying after me:…”
I took Micah’s large hand into mine and slipped the ring onto his finger as I stated, “With this ring, I seal my promise to be your faithful and loving wife, as God is my witness.”
“Ladies and gentleman, please bow your heads as we offer a blessing for this couple: Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will shelter the other. Now you will feel no cold, for you will be warmth for the other. Now there will be no more loneliness because you are together. The twain has become one and you face one life set before you. Enter into your house together that all the days of your union may be good and beautiful and long upon this earth.
“Micah and Annalisa, you have come before us and God to express your desire to be husband and wife. You have demonstrated your love and affection by joining hands and have made promises of faith and devotion, each to the other, and have sealed these promises by the giving and the exchanging of the rings. Therefore, it is my privilege as a minister and by the state of Florida, I pronounce you are husband and wife. Micah, you may kiss your wife.”
As Micah lifted my veil, I saw the first tear slip down his cheek. I hadn’t realized until that moment my tears had been softly sliding down my face. We looked at each other and, in unison, said, “I love you.” I felt his lips envelope mine as he brought me against his chest. My world vanished as he took away my ability to breathe with the most heartfelt, tender, and warm kiss of my life.
“Ladies and gentleman,” Pastor Anderson said as he turned us to face the roomful of people, “it is my privilege to introduce to you for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Micah Gavarreen.”
It was so incredible to realize we did it. The door to forever opened before us as we walked out of the chapel as husband and wife.
We exited the chapel as our guest went ahead of us to the reception. The photographer kept us occupied for about another half hour and then we finally joined the celebration. We cut the cake and shared the first slice without smearing it in each other’s face, but I could see the smile tearing at the corners of Micah’s mouth as he positioned the cake for me to bite into it and the thought popped into his head.
When it came time to share the first drink, I was surprised to find that it was grape juice instead of wine. Micah said wine was traditional, but evidently he changed his mind and decided we would keep our promise to each other to avoid alcohol.
The lights dimmed as the time came for our first dance. The music began and the song we chose, When God Made You, by Newsong and Natalie Grant began. I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from singing, but I never expected, as he held me tight and slowly spun me across the floor that he would begin to sing quietly to me.
“…but now that I have found you I believe, that a miracle has come when God sends the perfect one. Now gone are all my questions about why, and I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life… I wonder if He knew everything I would need, because He made all my dreams come true. When God made you, He must have been thinking about me.”
He held me so securely that I couldn’t pull away to look into his face, but I could tell as he finished those last words he was becoming emotional. Softly, I sang my part back to him.
“I promise that wherever you may go, wherever life may lead you, with all my heart I’ll be there too. And from this moment on I want you to know, I’ll let nothing come between us… I wonder what God was thinking when He created you, I wonder if He knew everything I would need because He made all my dreams come true. When God made you He must’ve been thinking about me.”
As the song ended and everyone clapped, we held each other for a moment longer and dried each other’s tears. From that point on, the dancing was a blur to me. I danced with Giorgio next as Micah took his mother onto the floor. Friends and family began taking their turns dancing with the bride and it didn’t take long before someone spun me and I ended up in David’s arms.
“Best man’s turn,” he said with an easy smile.
I wasn’t sure how to respond to him simply because, even though I accepted the fact that he was infatuated with my mother, I hadn’t spoken to him about what had happened that night. I gave a light smile as he took me across the floor. He was a good dancer, which didn’t really surprise me since the ability to move well was one of Micah’s traits also. Dancing wasn’t how they learned it, but it came from years of fights, struggles and bullet ballets.
“I don’t normally like to attend these things,” he continued, “and I’ve never agreed to take part in one, but since you’re stealing away my baby brother, I figured, what the hell. Why not?”
“I’m not removing him from the planet, David,” I responded.
“Oh, yes you are. You took him out of his world the minute you stole his heart when he was supposed to kill you.” His face still wore the smile and no one would be the wiser as to what we were discussing. “We did the majority of our jobs together, but I had a strange feeling when he agreed to your hit that something was getting ready to change, I just never would have expected this. I haven’t had a job with him since.” He continued to dance me toward the door that led out to the gardens, and I willingly followed his lead as we stepped away from the crowd.
Micah and I didn’t discuss his previous victims because when he said I wouldn’t want to know how ruthless he was before he met me, I believed him. I assumed he worked alone, and I never imagined he and David partnered on much of what they did. No wonder David disliked me so much at the beginning. With Micah out of the mafia, David was now alone, but it didn’t matter at this point since he helped put Robert away. Micah told me after David worked with the police to nail Robert, he hadn’t had a job since-no one would touch him. I owed this man quite a bit, but I hoped what I was getting ready to tell him wouldn’t be considered payment.
“I know, Micah told me,” I said and then changed subjects. “You’re sure you can only stay tonight? I booked your room at the Acqualina for two nights, in case you change your mind.”
I followed his eyes as he looked over to where my mother was dancing with one of my cousins, “I wish I could stay longer, I just-”
“I trust you are pretty good at being covert, but just to let you know Kimmy is a solid sleeper.”
An extremely puzzled look crossed his face.
“The room I booked for you,” I continued, “has a guest door to the adjoining room-Nadia’s room.” I couldn’t call her Mom for the moment as I was explaining that he could have access to her, if she were willing. “You will promise me to be discreet and that you’ll never ever do anything to hurt her. Agreed?”
I watched his eyes as he studied me.
“He told you?”
I could see the honest surprise.
“He said he didn’t want to know because you would make him tell you. I didn’t believe him. I’ve seen people try to beat stuff out of that boy and he’s never opened his mouth. What do you do to him?”
“You talked with my mother. Did you tell her some things you didn’t expect to say?”
The smile on his face grew wider as he began to see my point.
“So you tell me what we do, because I don’t know.”
“I’m really glad,” he confessed as he pulled me tightly against his chest just like his brother and then whispered in my ear, “that Micah jumped me before I squeezed the trigger that day because I didn’t realize what a treasure he’d found.”
“Oh, yes, that reminds me.” I pushed back to regain the proper distance; Micah was the only one who needed to hold me that close. “You will promise, swear on your brother’s life actually, that no drugs will be involved; if she says no, you’ll take no for an answer.”
He got an odd look to his face, “Believe it or not, I couldn’t do that to her-I can take a no.”
The song ended and David leaned forward and slowly kissed my cheek. He squeezed my hands and thanked me and said he was going to get the next dance with Nadia before someone else got to her.
I watched him walk back into the room just as I felt someone touch my arm; Micah was there.
“I was wondering why he brought you out here?” he quietly questioned.
I smiled, “I was willing. I had to tell him something.”
“What?”
“That I booked him a room with a guest door-to my mother’s suite.”
He grinned and gave a small chuckle, “You are never going to stop surprising me, are you?”
I pulled him into my arms and kissed him softly, “I certainly hope not.”
At that moment we heard the sound of someone coming out to the garden, and, as we turned to see who it was, Ryan was standing there, but abruptly retreated to go back inside.
“Ryan,” Micah called out to him.
He paused and looked at us.
Micah lifted my hand toward him, “Have you danced with the bride yet?”
He didn’t say a word; he crossed the short distance between us and accepted my hand.
Micah kissed my cheek and went back inside, once again trying his wings out at not being jealous.
“I asked them to play a special song,” he stated, a light blush came across his cheeks. “I don’t know if they have-”
At that moment the music began to flow from the reception hall and I could hear the Michael W. Smith song, Friends are Friends Forever, begin to play.
“Would you like to dance?” he asked quite gallantly.
“You don’t have to ask,” I smiled and went into his arms. “I like the song choice; it’s perfect.”
He gave a heavy sigh and continued to dance.
“What’s the matter?” I asked.
He looked down at me with those big blue eyes and said he had lousy timing.
“What do you mean?”
“I had the chance to start at PHS in the fall last year, but I drug my feet until March. If I’d have…” He shook his head and went silent.
It didn’t matter, I knew what he was thinking and I was surprised at myself as the realization hit me that he was absolutely right. “If you’d have started sooner, I’d be with you instead of Micah?”
A half smile emerged, “Definitely. I liked you from the moment I met you in English class. I think I’d have had my work cut out for me, but I’d like to think you’d have eventually come around.”
I blushed. “I would have,” I confirmed for him. “But I’m sure God intended for us to just be friends, really good friends.” But it was time to change the subject because the hold he had on me was getting firmer, “So you’ll start back at school next week. What’s after that?”
“I’ll finish up at PHS since they have the Air Force ROTC program and then it’s on to Colorado Springs.”
I raised my eyebrows without thinking, “What’s there?”
“The United States Air Force Academy; I have a full scholarship.”
“Wow, that’s pretty impressive, but…”
“But what?”
“What happened to Eglin? I thought you’d be staying in Florida.”
“No, I just had family at Eglin.”
An odd pang hit me hard in the chest as the thought of Ryan flying into a war zone crossed my mind, “H-how long does it take to become a pilot?”
“I’m already a pilot,” he replied as smoothly as if he was telling me he was male, “but it takes a bachelor’s degree from the Academy, officer’s training and a lot of other things to fly in the Air Force.”
I took in a comforting breath; a lot can happen in four years, and maybe the world will be a more peaceful place when the time comes for him to hit the sky.
“So how about you? Does your life end here tonight?” he asked.
I know the color drained from my face, “What?” The shock I felt was clearly communicated in my single word question.
“I mean are you forgetting about college and a career? I’m seeing him as a ‘keep-her-barefoot-and-pregnant’ kind of guy.”
I rolled my eyes and felt the color returning to my cheeks, “He’s already told me he doesn’t want me to be a teenage mother and, to answer the first part of that question, I haven’t decided yet exactly what I want to do, but whatever it is it won’t be for the money-I have that covered.”
He laughed, a big grin spread across his face, “Yeah, I know that’s right.” He spun me slowly in time to the music and then the smile faded, “So I guess this is gonna be it for us-I wish it wasn’t.”
“Why does this have to ‘be it’ for us? Can’t we keep in touch?”
“No one ever does that, Leese. Everyone has good intentions and then they drift apart and the years slip by, and before you know it, we’ll only be a memory for each other.”
“Geez, Ryan, that’s a depressing statement,” I frowned. I truly didn’t want this to be it. He and Micah were the most unique people in my life. Micah and I were pledged to having forever together, but how do you keep a friend from slipping away?
“It’s true. You have a new life in front of you that doesn’t include your friends. But,” he added with a sweet look on his face, “I’ll never, ever forget you.” His lips came against my cheek and rested there for a long moment. “I don’t suppose,” he whispered, “You’d approve if I moved this to your lips, would you?”
I returned the kiss to his cheek, “No-these lips are for my husband. But I guarantee you that I won’t forget you either.” I wasn’t expecting to cry, but I felt the sting coming on, “Are you staying at the Acqualina like most of the guests?” I was trying to find any reason for this not to be the last time I would see his face.
“I’ll spend a couple nights, but then it’s back to Pensacola.” The song was ending and he gave me a firm squeeze and kissed my forehead, “Love you, Leese,” he said, turning me loose and walking away.
One tear slipped down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away as Micah came around the corner to bring me back inside where our guests were waiting. I know he saw it, but he also knew I considered Ryan a good friend.
He pulled me on to the dance floor, “I think this will be our last dance tonight, here anyway,” he added with a sultry look so hot I could feel it on my skin.
“Special request?” I asked.
“Definitely, baby. Your request.”
“My request?”
“I think you’ll remember,” he smiled, centering us on the dance floor as the guests moved away and the lights dimmed.
As the music began, I realized it was the song I picked when he slow danced with me in my music studio at home. The blush felt as if it covered me from head to toe as I’ll Make Love to You, began to fill the room.
“Are you ready?” he whispered in an echo to the singer’s words, “I’ll hold you tight, baby, all through the night…tonight is your night.”
“Oh, Micah,” I whispered back, “I didn’t think tonight was ever going to arrive. I’m ready to spend the first night of the rest of my life in your arms. Let’s go.”
The next thing I knew we were running for the open limousine door as our guests blew a shower of bubbles over the walkway.
The hotel was only minutes away and before I could even collect my thoughts we were in the elevator and on the way up to our suite. Micah became very quiet, but his eyes were speaking volumes about what was going through his mind. I couldn’t stop the constant blush that waved across my skin as he held me in his gaze.
When we reached the door, he opened it and then swept me off my feet and carried me inside, “We made it, baby-I can’t believe we’re finally here.”
“Me either,” I said, smiling up at him.
“I was thinking, since we’ve been so patient, there is no reason to rush tonight. I’d like to get comfortable and dance with you some more.”
I was pleasantly surprised, especially since I was scared, but I didn’t want to tell him I was feeling this way.
He came around behind me, his lips caressing my bare shoulders and neck as he slowly unzipped my gown. His mouth followed the zipper down to the base of my spine. He was kneeling on the floor when he finished, his steel hands holding my hips as he placed kisses on my lower back.
I turned and looked into those eyes so filled with love as I allowed the gown to slip to the floor. He offered me his hand and I stepped out of it. I could see the flush of heat on his skin as he looked at me in my lacy white bustier, panties, and garter.
“Go ahead and slip on something comfortable,” he said through husky vocal cords.
I disappeared into the bedroom, putting away my gown and pulling out the silk, white baby doll outfit I had chosen for tonight. I hadn’t realized how badly I was shaking until I tried to put it on.
When I returned to where he was waiting, I noticed he removed most of the trappings of his full tuxedo and was down to just the slacks and his dress shirt, untucked and the buttons undone. I hadn’t shown him my outfit when I bought it; I wanted it to be a surprise and from the look on his face I knew he liked my choice.
He had the stereo softly playing love songs in the background as he opened his arms and pulled me in close, “Leese, I can’t even begin to describe how much I love you-it may sound a little weird, but it almost hurts.”
It didn’t sound weird to me. I’d been feeling the ache and hurt inside me since the first time I realized I was falling in love with him, “I know what you mean; I feel the same way.”
We danced around the living room for quite some time as the heat and the desire to take the final step into forever became overwhelmingly powerful.
His breathing became shallow and quick as he finally confessed he didn’t want to wait any longer and asked, if I was ready, could he take me to the bedroom?
“Yes, Micah,” I whispered, “I’m ready. Make love to me, baby.” I looked into those eyes and knew there was no turning back now. He was holding me to his chest as he carried me to the bed. The moonlit Atlantic sparkled beyond the large glass doors leading out to our balcony. I had two candles burning, but otherwise the room was dim.
He kissed me long and deep when he laid me back on the bed. His hands, hands that had always been careful not to be sexual, hands that had not caressed my breasts, nor inner thighs began to command my body. My back arched with need as he slipped the straps from my shoulders, kissing the places as he exposed them. His hot mouth suddenly suckling and caressing my breasts, and I felt all semblances of my control erode as I began to beg for him, to experience him, to give all I had to him.
His hands stopped as they gripped the sides of my panties, and he looked at me. I was lost somewhere in a place of tremendous need as I returned the gaze and begged him not to stop. I never expected him to kiss and caress what he was uncovering, but it was the most unique sensation I’d ever experienced as his mouth buried against the center of my desire.
I pulled away from him, sliding upward into the bed with what must have been a look of fright on my face.
“Are you okay, Leese? Did I do something wrong?” he whispered.
“I’ve never felt this way, Micah,” I choked out. “I’m scared.”
“I just thought you’d like to get off before-”
“Get off what?” I was down to bare skin; there wasn’t anything else to remove.
His head cocked sideways as he pulled himself up to look into my eyes, “Leese, I know you’ve never had sex, but you’ve gotten off before-the shower in the bungalow, you…” An unusual look spread across his face. “All you did was take a shower?”
“What else would I do in the shower?”
“No wonder it didn’t help you,” he whispered, kissing the tip of my nose. “You’ve never had an orgasm? Baby, I didn’t know you were that virgin.”
All I knew was that an orgasm was a sexual experience and something I thought was to be saved for tonight, “Don’t I need you for that?”
He smiled slowly, “No, but I’m certainly glad you’ve saved it for me.”
“But, how could I-”
“That’s why you stopped me. You were starting to feel it coming on weren’t you?”
“I don’t know what that was, but I was afraid I was getting ready to lose my grip on reality-because that wasn’t real.”
“Don’t be afraid, baby, I promise you, it’s real and you’ll like it,” he crooned.
“But I’ll lose control,” I started to tear up, that was the true reason why I had him stop; I realized something was getting ready to happen I couldn’t control.
“Baby, we’re both going to lose control tonight, but it’s okay because that’s all a part of making love. I’m going to take control of you and you are going to do the same to me.”
“I don’t know how,” I cried softly, a tear running down my cheek.
He wiped the tear away and smiled, “You do, whether you know it or not. You’ve got control of me right now and I’d do anything to please you.”
I nodded, “Then let me take your clothes off.”
He rose from the bed and I followed, slowly removing his shirt and kissing and caressing his fabulous body. I knelt in front of him as I undid his waistband.
His hands reach down and stopped me, “I don’t think I can handle you doing this part, Leese.”
“No. Please, Micah. No boundaries tonight, let me take them off you.”
I could tell he was fighting to retain his ability to be in charge of his desire so he wouldn’t do what he threatened that morning in the Hyatt. I knew he was ready to grab me and collide with me in the bed, but with tremendous effort he permitted me to remove his slacks. He closed his eyes and I could see his hands clinch as I began to lower his boxers to the floor, but as I did, I permitted myself the first opportunity to touch his body intimately and he snapped.
I didn’t even have time to react as my body was moved from kneeling on the floor to lying underneath him on the bed. My heart was pounding so hard it was painful, his teeth biting firmly but gently on my shoulder. He kept repeating “Baby, baby, oh baby,” as he pulled me against himself, parts of our bodies touching that I had never experienced. He kissed me hard, and then broke the kiss.
He must have seen the fear on my face as he began to calm, “I can’t hurt you, Leese. I’ve got to slow down.”
“Micah, I’m ready for you to hurt me,” I said with an unsteady voice, my hips rising to meet his and my calves keeping him from pulling away from me. “Don’t stop. I need you.”
He was still working on control as he lowered his body against mine.
The heat alone was enough for strange sensations to hit me. I felt his body push as my body resisted. I gasped for my breath.
He looked at me as a strange smile appeared on his face, “She’s right. I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing. I need you to guide me, Leese. You’re going to have to show me where it feels right for you.”
I was truly frightened to touch him intimately again, the last time was explosive enough, but I could tell he was ready for the sensation of my hand this time. He moaned deeply as I placed him where my sensations seemed to culminate, where need, desire, and heat centered themselves.
“Now, baby?” he asked.
I nodded as he pushed again. I didn’t mean to sink my nails into his back, but I couldn’t help myself as my body resisted him.
He knew what would help me forget the pain, as his mouth descended on to mine and he kissed me with all the emotion he had the very first time our lips ever met, stealing away my ability to breathe. His hips thrust and the barrier gave way.
I gasped and cried out, a mingling of pain and pleasure enveloped me.
“Are you okay?” he asked, his body stopped all forward movement.
I was still catching my breath, a feeling mounting that was completely foreign to me and it frightened me to the core. It felt as if someone inside me that I never knew had been awakened and was about to take over.
He pressed again and once more my body was resisting. I knew there was more of him waiting to enter as he pressed again. I was losing my fear of what was about to happen and instead I was building to some invisible anticipation of what was taking place inside me.
“I can’t, Leese. I’m sorry, but it feels like I’m going to tear you in two.”
“No, please…ah…Micah, don’t stop,” I panted. “I need you, baby…ah.” The experience was beginning to overwhelm me.
He pressed harder and the barrier gave way.
I didn’t mean to get loud, but I couldn’t help myself as he moved rhythmically within me, shock waves of pleasure coursing through me. I couldn’t breathe and I couldn’t stop what he had put into motion inside me as I rode over the top of the new sensation.
He cried out, and I suddenly realized he was joining me in this feeling as our bodies no longer had a separation where one ended and the other began.
He held me for the longest time as he slowed his breathing, kissing my temple, my cheek, the tip of my nose, my lips, and chin. “Baby,” he said, choked by emotion, “I’ve never… You are the most perfect thing I’ve ever known in my life and definitely worth the wait. I love you.”
He began to pull away when I finally found my voice, “Please, can we stay this way for a little while? I don’t want this to end just yet.”
“Baby,” he crooned in his velvety voice, “this is only the beginning; we’ve got a lifetime to enjoy each other.”
My nightmare flashed in my mind and I tried to tell myself there was no reason to worry anymore, we made it, “Please,” I begged.
He wrapped me in those steel bands and pulled me in tight, “Anything you want, anything.”
Eventually, we became drowsy and relaxed.
“Would you take a shower with me?” he whispered.
I was so comfortable, but the idea was appealing and had been appealing since he asked me that same question back when we were staying in the bungalow. I looked up and smiled from some place cuddled deep against his chest, “I’d like that.”
I sat up, feeling the soreness I hadn’t experienced until I started moving. Micah came up behind me as I leaned forward to compensate for the ache, but he realized what I was doing. He pressed his bare body to my back and reached around and allowed his hands to rub my abdominals gently.
“Does it hurt, baby?” he asked, placing a kiss on my shoulder.
I nodded, pressing my hands to his and holding pressure against the cramping feeling.
“Do you want me to carry you?”
“No, I’ll be fine,” I whispered.
“You go ahead and get into the shower then and let the hot water start relaxing you. I’ll join you in a minute.”
I wondered why, and then I turned to see him folding up and removing the stained comforter from the bed. The cramping was getting stronger so I followed orders, sitting on the shower ledge and letting the hot rain pour down on me. Within moments the fogged up door to the shower opened and he stepped in. I started to rise, but he told me to stay where I was.
“I want you to relax and let me do the work,” he said pouring shower gel into his hands.
What a unique feeling as his large hands slipped over my skin, soaping and massaging as they moved. I was actually feeling guilty to be relaxing and enjoying what he was doing without returning the pleasure, but he was insistent that I enjoy it and that was all. His hands worked lower, gently massaging and washing my lower abdominals and groin. I closed my eyes as he began to wash the more intimate areas. I was a little worried he might get soap in places that would be uncomfortable, but he was incredibly careful and slow as he worked. Eventually his hands slid down my thighs, calves and finished with my feet (which tickled, but there was no way I was going to laugh after such a sensual experience).
He lifted me from the ledge and placed me in his lap, leaning me forward as he began to lather my hair. He was literally removing every ounce of tension from my body as his finger tips massaged my scalp. He pulled the lever to divert the water out the waterfall ledge as he raised me to my feet and allowed the torrent of water to rinse me.
“You’ve got to let me do this to you,” I whispered through heavy eyelids. I was so relaxed under the rising steam I could have laid on the shower floor and slept soundly.
“You can’t even keep your eyes open,” he chuckled as he turned off the water and began to dry me off. “How are the cramps?”
“I’m relaxed, but they’re getting stronger.” I wondered how he knew I was cramping, but then I became aware of my body language as I tipped forward slightly with one forearm pressed above my bikini line.
“Then it’s off to bed and I’ll get you some Motrin.”
I nodded and attempted to step out of the shower, but as soon as the cooler air hit me, the cramps tightened. He picked me up and took me to the bed and placed me beneath the covers, tucking me in like a child. I drew my knees up against a pillow clutched to my stomach as the pain grew more intense. He was back with something to drink and three pills in his hand. As soon as I swallowed them, he blew out the candles leaving nothing but moonlight streaming into the room and crawled into the bed and placed his hot body against my back and wrapped me in his arms.
“Still bad?” he whispered thirty minutes later.
I nodded. The pain was like riding a wave, one minute it was rising and peaking and then I seemed to slide down to where I was almost comfortable and then it would build again.
“I should have been more careful,” he began to chastise himself.
I laced my fingers through his and brought his hand to my mouth and kissed it, “You were perfect and it was better than I ever imagined it could be. The doctor said I’d be sore, Micah; this isn’t your fault. Just keep me warm. I’ll be better in the morning.”
He kissed my bare shoulder and neck and then nuzzled into my hair, whispering how much he loved me and that was the last thing I remembered until sunrise opened my eyelids.
The cramps ended in the night and my sleep was dreamless and deep. Micah’s arm was still wrapped around me as I smiled at the memories from last night. I don’t know how, but he realized I was awake.
“Good morning, Mrs. Gavarreen,” he said, his hand splayed across my abdominals. Just one of his hands felt as if it could cover me, “feeling better?”
I rolled over and kissed him briefly, “Good enough to make love again to my husband,” I replied, then allowed the tip of my tongue to brush against his lips. I wasn’t afraid of him anymore as my hand slid under the covers to forbidden places. I could tell it was still difficult for him, but he was managing the sensation, “I want to kiss you,” I said barely loud enough for even myself to hear.
Immediately his mouth began seeking mine.
“Not your mouth,” I said, keeping my voice soft. “I want to kiss you like you did to me when you pulled my underwear off last night.”
His eyes filled with fright, “I’m not ready to handle you doing that, Leese. I’m still getting used to the touch of your hand. You do things to me, inside, that no one’s ever done and it’s incredibly intense.”
“Umm…I like that,” I answered, “but you will let me when you’re ready?”
He smiled.
I knew that was a yes.
“I want to show you something,” he said, smoothly rolling me back to my side and curling his bare form behind me. I was ready to be his eager student once more. He taught me how to shoot, how to kiss, and last night, how to make love, so I had no hesitation in allowing him control.
He propped himself against the headboard and pulled me onto him as if he had become a human lounger. His left arm and hand around mine and his right around my right, but as he brought my left hand up to my breast, I resisted slightly.
“Relax,” he whispered, “I just want to show you how to get off.”
“You showed me that last night,” I said with mirth in my voice, my hand slipping out of his grasp and sliding around his bare thigh.
He gripped my hand and brought it back across my chest. “I mean on your own,” he clarified.
“I don’t need to learn how to do that. I’ll just let you-”
“Baby, I know there’ll be times when we’re apart and I don’t want you to think you need a man for this.”
A stab of panic hit me as my heart began picking up the pace, “No, we aren’t going to be apart, ever.”
“I promised my Dad I would go with him next month to check out some businesses he is considering and-”
“I’ll come with you,” I interrupted.
He kissed the side of my neck, “That won’t work, and I won’t be gone long. It won’t be often, but I know there are going to be times when we’re away from each other. Now, would you please let me show you how to do this? Please,” he added for emphasis. “Besides, I think it would be a turn on to watch you,” he said as his hot breath filled my ear.
Turning him on I knew would become a passion of mine, but being apart, even for a day, I didn’t like. I stopped resisting as he brought my hand back to caress my breast and my other was slid lower. Not resisting was going to prove difficult, but soon he was whispering in my ear and caressing my neck with kisses and things eventually became easier, and I found myself eager to do what he wanted me to do. Heat built from friction and need pushed me to the pinnacle as the shockwave gripped me so hard I literally doubled over and rolled to my side, pulling him with me.
“Stop! Stop!” I begged twisting my hand from his grip as the cramps returned with a vengeance. I was trying to catch my breath, trying to force my muscles to relax after the onslaught to my senses.
“Oh, baby,” he said, pressing his aroused body hard to mine, “that was sexy.” He must have realized I wasn’t totally comfortable at the moment. “Are you cramping again?”
“Yeah, but it’s already starting to ease.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t think this would set them off again.”
“It’s okay, I’ll be fine in a few minutes.”
“So how was the orgasm?” he asked, curiosity clear in his voice.
“Hard,” I whispered.
“Difficult kind of hard or-”
“Strong kind of hard,” I whimpered, drawing up my knees.
“Harder than last night?” There was a funny, surprised sound to his voice.
“Yeah, this was a lot harder, but in a different way.” I rolled over to look at him. “I liked last night better, it was more of a complete feeling, this was-I don’t know how to describe it, but it was just straight on and intense. I like the feeling of this being part of love making, not just satisfying myself. Does that make sense?”
He gave a crooked smile as he looked up toward the ceiling, “Maybe it wasn’t the best idea to show you how to do this. I may have just given myself competition.”
The cramps were almost gone as I sat up and placed myself over him, letting my hair brush against his bare chest. “You have nothing to worry about because I prefer you to me anytime. But I want you to show me something else,” I smiled.
I could see the amusement on his face, “What?”
I straddled his lap with my knees on either side of his bare groin, and I could see the deep sensation of pleasure wash over him as my body touched his. The steel grip grabbed my thighs and I sighed, arching my back and lifting his hands to my breasts. “Do you remember this, baby?” I said and then attempted to wiggle free. His hands moved swiftly from my breasts to my thighs, clamping down on me almost hard enough to bruise.
“Ooh, Leese, don’t-” Then the big smile caused his lips to part, “Yeah, how could I forget.”
“I wanted that moment so badly, but we couldn’t. I want it now. Make love to me the way you would have that day.”
His face pressed against my chest, moaning out my name; his hands lifted my breasts to his scorching mouth as he caressed them. “Leese, I don’t know if we can do this without making you hurt again,” he panted out the words as his body told me he was ready to enjoy me this way.
“I’m not afraid. Please, Micah.”
He reached for the nightstand and grabbed the remote for the stereo; I’ll Make Love to You came on.
He lifted me by the waist, as I helped by rising up on my knees and then slowly reseated myself, gasping at the feeling as he entered me, his hands showing me to lift myself ever so slightly as he began to move his hips under me. There was no painful barrier, only a firm fluid movement that took me by surprise. I struggled to remember to breathe as he became more intense. He wrapped his arms around me and then rolled me onto the bed, never breaking the rhythm that was perfectly timed to the music.
I danced with him to this song and now he was dancing within me. The sensation was overwhelming. I didn’t expect this to be slow and gentle, and the feeling was extraordinary. The rise to pleasure was gradual and rich, as the music changed to Back at One, and he continued building a stairway toward heaven. His hips moving, at times, in an easy grind against me and I was slipping beyond the point of no return.
I’m not sure exactly what I was saying to him, except that I loved him so much I wanted him to join me as I crested. I curled my hips toward him so far that the small of my back was no longer on the bed. Then his rhythm changed to a rapid, hard pace and I couldn’t wait any longer, my face buried against his neck to muffle my cry and within an instant I could tell he joined me and was experiencing the same pleasure.
His chest heaved as he gasped for air, a light sheen of sweat across his perfect body, “I’m never going to get enough of you, baby,” he said, with a breathless kiss to my lips.
“I hope not,” I breathed back to him, “but will it always be this good? You don’t think I’ll become boring, do you?”
He laughed out loud, his head falling back onto the pillow, “Of course you will,” he said, flashing his beautiful smile, “in about a million years. No,” he answered, all teasing erased. “I didn’t truly believe that forever could exist until I met you and now all I can think about is that we’re going to spend it together. You’ll never be boring to me, Annalisa, so don’t change anything. I love you just the way you are-except pregnant, someday I want to change you that way, just not now. I want you to get the chance to be young and happy for quite a few more years before we take that step.”
“But if I end up pregnant from this Micah, it’ll be okay.”
“No,” he was shaking his head, “she told us we had a small window, that’s why this is it for unprotected sex. The next time I make love to you, I’m wearing a condom.”
“But Micah, she said four or five days.”
“I don’t want to get you pregnant at eighteen, Leese. That’s too young.”
“And if I am right now?” I questioned, turning his face to me and making sure I had his full attention.
“I still say you’re too young to go through that.”
“Well, I don’t believe in abortion, so I guess you’ll just have to deal with an eighteen-year-old pregnant wife. God does everything-”
“For a reason, I know. I don’t believe in abortion either and I’d never expect you to do something like that, so I guess, to answer your original question, we’d become parents nine months from now. But I’m not taking any more chances with you.”
“Will it change things for us? The condoms, I mean.”
“It’ll change things a little for me, but you should stay happy.”
“But I’m not happy if you aren’t.”
“Trust me, they aren’t going to stop me from being happy with you; it’ll just take me a little longer to reach my orgasm. By the way, any cramps?”
“If there were, they’re gone and all I remember is how fabulous you felt. You were dancing inside me and-”
“Dancing?” he seemed surprised.
“You didn’t realize you were timed to the music?”
He started to laugh, “I’m glad I didn’t accidently have some hard rock mixed in with the CD’s.”
I grinned, “Well, I think you had a little hard rock going through your head at the end, but other than that you were my private dancer and I’ll never hear those songs quite the same way again.”
“How about breakfast and lunch in our room; then we can join some of our guests for dinner tonight?”
I looked at the clock, “That’s about eight or nine hours from now. We’ll have to think of something to keep us entertained,” I said with a sly grin, “I get to wash you in the shower this time.”
We both laughed, knowing the next hours would be just as pleasurable as the last.