Marvin Balakian was not your typical Armenian-looking man. For one thing, he didn't have hair on his chest as most apish Armenians do. But Marvin was proud that he didn't have hair on his chest – shit, there were a lot of Armenians that Marvin knew who didn't have hair on their chests. Of course, most of them were Armenian girls – like Cher, who not only didn't have hair on her chest, but didn't have much of a chest. Which is true of most Armenian grit.
Unlike other Armenians, Marvin also didn't grow grapes in his back yard, he was not covertly wealthy, and he didn't have that dark skin that most people whose names end in the suffix "ian" have, either. Marvin, in fact, looked pretty common – which was the reason why Marvin always considered himself pretty fucking insecure.
He knew he had an inferiority complex – most likely because he also considered himself the most unpopular person in the world.
Like in the tenth grade, when he was standing in line to see Macy's Santa Claus (Marvin still believed in Santa Claus as a sophomore in high school because for fifteen Christmases he never got anything in his stocking – probably because his mother never gave him a stocking to hang up), he had waited for four horns to tell good old St. Nick what he wanted for J.C.'s birthday. Finally, when he was next in line, he was told by one of Santa's well-stacked elves that Santa had just been fired for molesting a young girl while she sat on his lap.
Marvin had been crushed. Then doubly crushed when he went over to Gimbel's and found their Santa Claus dead of a heart attack.
Then there was the unlucky time that Marvin joined Alpha Smegma Rho fraternity. It was initiation night, and all the elderly brothers brothers are how college fraternity guys address each other after they had been going to college for ten years blindfolded him and led him down into the basement of their fraternity house.
There, in the dank underworld, the President of the fraternity, an Okie kid who would later be famous as a stand-in for Colonel Sanders, told him: "Now, Pledge Balakian, ya won't be hurt in this here 'nitiation. What we want ya to do is take out your old cob and give it a few husks and make it grow big and hard."
It was a good thing that Marvin had been going to the University of Oklahoma for seven years. Otherwise he would have never understood in Okie lingo that he was to yank his cock out and start beating off.
Marvin yanked his cock out and started beating off.
Then he heard a woman's voice. Marvin was shocked. Women weren't allowed in the frat house!
But the woman's voice was laughing, a tee-hee sound that shocked the shit out of him.
Shit! A woman was in a frat house watching him jack off while he was blindfolded!
He stopped jacking off.
The woman's voice stopped tee-heeing.
The Okie voice came at him again: "Now, Pledge Balakian, ya do want to join our fraternity, don't ya?"
Marvin nodded.
"Well, then keep huskin' your cob. An' after it gets real good and ready, we're going let ya fuck."
The woman's tee-hee laughter echoed in the cold basement.
Marvin turned red. God, having sexual intercourse on campus was against the Dean's latest memo that had stated in Okie lingo: "All Fraternities – don't let me catch your cobs in any woman's crib, or I'll personally whip your asses as hard as a Kansas twister!"
And as Marvin's face turned red, so did his cock – he vowed he would do anything to get into Alpha Smegma Rho. Anything!
He started beating off again, his pudgy hands moving aver his cock harder and faster. Christ, his prick was getting all slippery!
The woman stopped tee-heeing. "My God, Elmer! Look at that prick! Why it's curved like a bow! Tee-hee."
Marvin's face went from red to crimson. God, he knew his prick had a funny shape – but, up until today, he was the only one who knew that. Now, two other people knew that his cock was curved like a bow. Shit, what could he do?
He kept stroking. Kept beating off. Anything for good old Alpha Smegma Rho.
Now his hands weren't moving straight up and down, they were moving over his cock at the same curved angle that a chimp would use to peel a Chiquita banana.
"Boy, that's sure a funny-looking cob," the Okie voice twanged. "Well, it looks like Bessie's more 'n ready, Pledge Balakian. Now move forward and get up on this stool."
Pledge Balakian moved forward and stumbled over a small stool. Christ, his cock was going down while he was trying to get up on the fucking stool. Shit, he felt like a fucking fool.
Good ole Alpha Smegma Rho.
He finally managed to stand on the stool.
Something warm and wet touched his cock. Oh, Jeeezus! What the hell was that? Something warm and wet touched his cock again. Oh, God! Could it be… no, they wouldn't dare, would they? What would the Dean say?
"Oh, Pledge Balakian," she cooed, "that was my cunt that just touched your cock. Did it feel good?"
Marvin was about to scream: Yes! Yes! Yes! Do it again! Do it again! Harder! Harder! But he knew the secret pledge rules of Alpha Smegma Rho – no talking for at least two semesters. He stayed mum – unless you counted the gasps and grunts he made as that strange warmth and wetness slid all over the tip of his prick.
God! He had never felt anything like it!
He couldn't believe that a pussy could feel so hot, could be so wet! Up to now, the only thing that had ever touched his prick was his own hands. But there it was again!
Marvin started hunching his hips forward, desperately frying to put his cock into that elusive pussy that teased him to the left, then to the right, then up and down.
Oh God! What delicious torment! Marvin jabbed out again. A warm meaty wetness engulfed a half-inch of his cockhead.
"Oh, Pledge Balakian!" Bessie moaned. "You almost fucked me then. You almost got your curvy prick into my wet pussy. Please just hold still, and I'll do all the work."
Marvin shook his head – sweat was running beneath the blindfold and stinging his eyes, but he couldn't hold still. Christ, cooze oil was pouring out of his cob. In other words, jizz was leaking from his prick. He couldn't take it much longer. He knew he was going to blast – then all the brothers of Alpha Smegma Rho would shave off all his hair, make him eat eighty Ex-laxes, force him to wear a jockstrap full of cockleburrs do all those cruel and unusual punishments that college fraternity men think up so that they can become tomorrow's lawyers, judges and Supreme Court Justices.
Oh, where was that pussy! God, he'd have to stick his cock into something or else his balls would be so uptight that they'd, cut off the hot flood of blood to his prick.
Oh, where was that pussy!
Suddenly it was there. A pussy was all there! Settling over his bloated curved cock like a greased glove.
Marvin shoved forward immediately. Ooooooh swweeeeeeet Jeeeezus! What ecstasy! What pleasure! All that meaty warmth just hugging his prick, surrounding his cob from his pubic hair to the flaring head of his cock.
Fuck the Dean!
Marvin withdrew – not enough that his upcurved cock could get hung up, but just enough so that there was plenty of prick to plow back into all that sweet delicious pussy!
"Oooooooh, doesn't that feel gooooooood, Pledge Balakian! Your cock feels soooooooo gooooood!"
Marvin wanted to scream, wanted to blurt out how wonderful a cunt felt. The words felt as if they were somewhere near his tonsils, but he swallowed them upon remembering his solemn pledge of silence to good Alpha Smegma Rho.
God, he was going to come! He knew it because he could feel it coming. His hips were moving so fast that they were a blur – or, at least to blindfolded Marvin they felt as if they were moving so fast that they were a blur.
He fucked harder and faster, his upcurved cock scraping along the upper wall of that wonderful cunt, feeling ill that heated moistness just pipping the goodness from his prick.
He was going to come!
And now he really wanted to scream. Wanted to spew out words that would drown out the obscene noises his cock was making as it slushed back and forth deep in the heart of that delicious pussy.
Marvin's hips worked as fast as a horny jack rabbit's. Sweat was flying off his body. His balls were spank-spank-spanking against the delicious meat that his prick was fuck-fuck-fucking so rhythmically.
Then the moment of truth was at hand.
The ultimate orgiastic pleasure was near.
The end of all ends was here and now! Which is what usually happens to cocks that go in and out, in and out of a pussy for five minutes.
The first blast of his pent-up, virgin cum shot out of his cock and kept shooting into the first pussy that be had ever fucked.
But before he could tell all those future Supreme Court Justices and Secretaries of State to fuck off, they banished him, rejected him, because he was considered too cry-babyish to join a fraternity of boys who acted like men.
Twenty-two years later, Marvin reflected upon that moment of fucking his first pussy. He wryly chuckled – oh, his pride had been hurt, sure, but not his prick. Shit, after that first piece of ass – after all, who gave a cow turd that his first piece of pussy had been a young teen – Marvin had vowed to fuck as many girls as he could get his hands on.
That vow had been made twenty-two years ago. And in that time any man who would have made that vow probably would have fucked 8,030 cunts at the rate of one pussy per day.