(I've searched the dictionary in vain),
Pray what's Mons Veneris?"
He look'd into her beauteous eyes,
So innocent of ill;
And gave the happiest of replies,
"It signifies Payne's Hill!"
INSTANCE OF SELF-DENIAL.
Mohammed Sadig, a gentleman at Hyderabad, received a female slave, belonging to his brother at Kurnool, who was going to Bengal, and requested Sadig to keep his property for a year. Her beauty excited his passions greatly. He told the story to my friend, Captain Keighley, and ended thus: "To lie with her carnally would have been wrong, as my brother had not permitted it, so I governed my love by the holy rules of moderation and virtue, and contented myself with merely fucking her in the arse."
George Stokes, the cheesemonger in Snowhill, had Dr. Cullen one night as a guest. Cullen did not fancy the cheese on the table, and said, "You do not know how to select cheese; let me go into the warehouse and pick one out." He did this, and the cheese he selected was delicious. Everyone declared it most excellent. "How did you pitch upon it, and in the dark, too?" said Stokes. "I'll tell you," said the Doctor. "I tried several, till I came to one which made my prick stand. This is it; a prime cheese smells exactly like a blooming, ripe, girl's cunt."
NURSERY RHYMES.
There was a young lady of Gaza,
Who shaved her cunt clean with a razor;
The crabs in a lump
Made tracks to her rump,
Which proceeding did greatly amaze her.
There was a young lass of Surat,
The cheeks of whose arse were so fat
That they had to be parted,
Whenever she farted,
And also whenever she shat.
There was an old priest of Siberia,
Who of fucking grew wearier and wearier;
So one night after prayers,
He bolted upstairs,
And buggered the Lady Superior.
There was an old man of Natal,
Who was lazily fucking a gal,
Says she, "You're a sluggard,"
Said he, "You be buggered,
I like to fuck slowly, and shall."
There was a young farmer of Nant,
Whose conduct was gay and gallant,
For he fucked all his dozens
Of nieces and cousins,
In addition, of course, to his aunt.
There was an old man of Tantivy,
Who followed his son to the privy,
He lifted the lid,
To see what he did,
And found that it smelt of Capivi.
There was a young man of this Nation,
Who didn't much like fornication;
When asked, "Do you fuck?"
He said, "No, I suck
Women's quims, and I use Masturbation."
There was a young parson of Eltham,
Who seldom fucked whores, but oft felt 'em.
In the lanes he would linger,
And play at stick finger,
'Twas on the way home that he smelt 'em.