The Nymphette Pain Lover
Each of us has a degree of masochism in us. This can be easily proved by recalling what a good feeling it was when we were punished by our parents for something we thought we had gotten away with, but which had been giving us a "guilty conscience."
Another way for most adults to test whether or not they have masochistic tendencies, is to recall the chills and thrills of a sex partner biting the ear, scratching parts of the body with fingernails, and so on.
However, responding to mild stimuli of a physical nature does not make one a masochist, in the true sense of the word.
A masochist is a person who either requires physical or mental punishment to be aroused enough to indulge in sex, or who requires punishment to attain a climax or feel sexual fulfillment, or the extreme, where a person can attain sexual climax without intercourse by being physically whipped, beaten, burned or mutilated.
As mentioned, we all have latent masochistic tendencies, yet, psychiatrists maintain that "masochists are not born they are made."
The case of Ginny tends to bear their theory out.
Ginny came to our attention after participating in a bloody, gruesome "pain orgy." Subsequent sessions with psychologists brought out the grim facts which made Ginny a classic masochist.
She was admittedly and avidly a "pain-lover" and when asked by doctors if she had any idea why, her story unfolded:
"No, I guess I don't really know," Ginny began. "I guess there's always been violence in my life. My Dad and Mom were always fighting, and they never cared if I was there or not. And I mean fighting where blood showed, most of the time.
"I didn't have any brothers or sisters and I don't think my parents wanted me. I was a mistake or a slip or something. They never acted like they loved me. I was just something that had happened, and they had to take care of me like it or not. I remember lots of nights and even weekends, when they would go off and just leave me alone with nobody to watch out for me or nothing. But I got used to that and learned to take care of myself pretty good.
"I used to be fascinated by their fighting. Partly because I used to wonder why they stayed together, if they hated each other, and partly because I began to see that they deliberately hurt each other, and sometimes, I even thought that they liked it.
"One time, when I was seven or so, they did it different. I didn't understand it at the time, but it makes sense to me now. Mom and Dad were having one of their arguments, and this one was a dilly. It was loud and nasty; they had been in ugly moods and had been at each other's throats all day. I knew a big one was coming, and I was watching TV, but I also kept one eye on them. I was pretty used to it, so it didn't bother me much. I could even follow the TV story while they were going at it.
"All at once, my father yelled, 'You cock-sucking bitch!' Then I heard a loud smack and my mother screamed, 'You fuckin’ gorilla!’
"I turned around and saw my mother lying on the floor, about three feet from my father. She was holding her mouth and some blood was running out of it into her hand. I guess he had really hit her a good one.
"Then she got up and ran at him with her fists doubled up, yelling, ‘You no-good, fuckin’ bastard!' She swung at him and he lashed back with his fist and smashed her in the face and she fell down again. Then she crawled over to him and grabbed him by the ankles and began to pull herself up slowly. Each time she would make it to her knees, he'd let her have another one. This went on five or six times. I couldn't say a word. I just sat watching, fascinated by the violence, and because my Mom kept coming back that way as if she wanted to be hit some more.
"Just when it seemed like she couldn't get up one more time, she reached up and unzipped my father's pants and reached in and pulled out his prick. He just stood and watched her, a funny look on his face. It was big and hard, and it didn't hang loose and short, like I'd seen it sometimes when he took a shower. It was big and hard and red and standing straight out.
"I watched in awe, but with a funny feeling between my legs, as my mother took that thing in her mouth and began to suck on it. I couldn't believe what she was doing, running her tongue over it, then sucking the head of it, and all the time the blood was running out of her mouth.
"She kept moaning all the time, like something was hurting her, and then my father bent down, picked her up, and carried her into the bedroom. They didn't even bother to close the door and I could see everything from where I was sitting. I didn't want to move because I didn't want to miss anything. I was a little scared that if my father caught me watching he might hit me like he'd hit my mother.
"Dad dropped Mom on the bed and began to yank her clothes off. She was crying and hollering at him but that didn't bother him at all. He tore every piece off her until she was naked. Then he took his own clothes off and laid down beside her, digging his fingernails into her breasts and in between her legs for a couple of minutes. Then he crawled on top of her. Mom spread her legs real wide and he stuck his prick into her cunt. I remember thinking that if that was the way you made kids, I didn't want any children.
"Dad was like some animal. He would pull his ass way up high, then he'd drive his prick into her cunt as deep and as hard as he could. Each time, Mom would groan aloud, and Dad began to scratch her with his fingernails, and he bit her all over. It was terrible to watch, and I was scared, but I just couldn't take my eyes off them.
"Mom was crying and bleeding and groaning, and Dad was sweating and panting, and everything seemed to get all mixed up. I was crying, too, because I thought he was going to kill her. I don't know how long it kept on it's like a nightmare I had but I noticed that everything seemed to be happening faster. Mom was jerking her ass up and down and kicking her feet in the air, and she was holding on to my father like she never wanted to let him go. She was saying something to him, it sounded like, 'Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck,' but I couldn't hear very clearly.
"Then all at once, after a lot of real wild jumping around, they both relaxed and my father kissed her a gentle kind of kiss not like he was trying to eat her up. When he pulled away from her, I was surprised to see how small his prick had become. He stood up next to the bed, and then he spotted me sitting there, almost in a trance, watching.
"He knew I had seen the whole thing, I guess, because he just gave me a hard, cold look like he was staring right through me. I got cold shivers up and down my body. I got up and went to my room. I fell asleep crying. I was suite he was going to come in and kill me. But nobody showed up, and I kept on wondering why my Mom liked to be hit like that, and why she kissed my Dad and sucked his prick and let him put it in her cunt.
"The next day was Saturday and neither of them were working, but it seemed that all of us were just tiptoeing around the place. We didn't look at each other if we could help it. Around two o'clock, Mom went out to do some shopping for groceries, and I was left alone with Dad. I was sitting in my room, not doing much of anything when he came in, I was scared and tears began to come into my eyes.
"I want to talk to you, Ginny,' he said in a soft, very gentle voice. I tried to make believe I didn't know what he wanted to talk about, but I did know… 'It's about last night. I know you must have seen everything your mother and I did.’
"I just nodded, not knowing what to say. Then he asked, 'Did you understand what you saw?' I didn't say anything. I felt sort of numb.
" 'No, I didn't think you would you're too young. But, you need to be taught a lesson so you won't go sneaking around and watching again.’
"He grabbed me and laid me across his lap and pulled my panties down. He said, 'Say, you have a nice little ass, Ginny,' and he rubbed his hand over it, in little circles. I relaxed for a minute and just when I did, his hand came down on my behind. It hurt, and it startled me, and I screamed. I expected him to hit me some more, but instead, he began to rub the spot where he'd hit me. So I relaxed again, thinking it was all over. But then he hit me again. He did this quite a few times and soon my whole body was feeling warm. I could feel the bony part of his knee pushing up between my legs, and every time he hit me, it forced his knee up against my cunt.
"Pretty soon, I began to get a funny feeling out of it. It was a strange feeling, but a good one. I didn't know what was happening to me, but I knew I felt good especially between my legs and in the bottom of my stomach. My whole body was tingling, and every time he hit me, it felt better, and I forgot all about the pain.
"I reached out and touched his cock through his pants. It was hard. Giving me a licking must have excited him. I kept my hand on it, and every time he'd hit me I would give it a squeeze, and that made him hit me harder and faster until it got to be real wild.
"Finally, he stopped hitting me and he pulled my panties up and picked me off his lap, holding me in his arms. He was breathing hard and sweating and one of his hands was between my legs. He was wiggling his finger against the lips of my cunt. Thinking back now, I know he wanted to rape me. If I had been a little older, he might have, but I wasn't even close to being eight years old. I guess that must have been what was going on in his mind, but after a bit, he just gave me a long, hard, cold look and said, 'You're gonna grow up to be just like your mother.' It wasn't until a long time later that I realized what he had meant, and by that time, I guess I was like my Mom.
"I guess that was the first time I ever really had any thoughts or feelings about sex, or at least getting the good feeling between my legs. I began to play with myself that same night, sticking my fingers inside my pussy and moving them around, but I didn't get that same good feeling I had when Dad had hit me and then rubbed my ass.
"I didn't know what to do for a while. It was mixing me up, because I couldn't get that good, warm feeling by playing with my cunt, and I wanted to feel it some more. I finally hit on the idea of being bad deliberately, so I could get my Dad to spank me some more. I began to talk back to him. I wouldn't do my chores or clean up my room. It worked after a while. He kept getting angrier with me, and he warned me that if I didn't behave, he'd give me a good spanking.
"In a strange way, I got a sort of a little thrill when he just warned me, and then I'd play with myself and remember how it felt when he did spank me. Finally, he did spank me, but when I began to reach out and stroke his cock, and when I didn't really cry, he caught on and told me I liked it too much, and that I was just like my mother. He told me he wasn't going to spank me any more.
"But I used to sneak around and watch him and Mom when they would have one of their sessions. I learned to masturbate with things that would hurt my cunt a little not things that would actually cut it, but things like oh the handle of a hairbrush that had carved figures on it, and the handle of a wrench of my Dad's that had rough markings on it.
"When I was ten and eleven, I was a holy terror a real pest with boys. I somehow wanted to torment them and make them so mad that maybe one of them would take my pants down and spank me, or maybe even hit me in the face, like Dad hit Mom. I'd never been hit like that, but I remembered all the times she would drag herself across the floor and suck his prick before they went to bed for one of their sessions.
"But the way I acted only made the boys avoid me, and I just got more and more frustrated. I used to masturbate a lot, but it got less and less fun, and I got sick and tired of just remembering the few times that my Dad spanked me. I played with a boy who lived down the street from me, and I used to try to get him to play house, where he'd be the daddy and I'd be the little girl, and I'd be bad and he'd take my panties down and spank me. But he was only eight and he was too scared. Besides, he didn't hit me hard enough to do any good, and he'd always change the game to something else. I even used to try to get his cock hard by playing with it, but he wouldn't go for that. One day, his mother caught me playing with him that way, and she wouldn't let me play there anymore.
"When I was eleven, my body was really beginning to develop. I looked as if I were about fifteen. I'd even begun to use lipstick, and my Mom let me dress a lot older and sexier than I really was. My breasts were already large enough for me to be wearing a bra. I was still in grammar school, but I never hung around my own school friends. Instead, I used to hang around the places where the high school kids gathered, and most of them just thought I was one of them.
"That's when I met Dick. I was at this hamburger stand, with a lot of other kids, when he walked over and started to talk to me. He asked me my name, and I told him. He said I was a 'good-looking chick’ and w o n d e r e d why he hadn't seen me around at the school dances, and at basketball or football games, and so on. I made up all sorts of lies, because I didn't want him to know how old I was. He was eighteen, and a senior, and he had his own car.
"He was good-looking, too, and for my taste he was sexy-looking. We talked awhile, and he bought me a coke and a hot dog. Then he suggested we take a ride in his car. I was too interested in him to say no, because I was afraid he'd never ask me again. Besides, I was already hot for him or for anybody, I guess.
"We got into his car and we drove to the hills. He began to talk about sex and stuff like that. He even asked me in a roundabout way, if I'd ever screwed. I didn't say much because I didn't want him to know that I'd never done anything with a boy that I'd only dreamt about it. The more he talked about sex, and how nice my breasts were, and what a cute shape I had, the hotter I got. I was a little scared, but the excitement was a lot greater than my fear.
"He went down a narrow dirt road after a while, and stopped the car in a little clearing near a creek that was almost dried up. 'Nobody will bother us here,' he said.
"We sat there for a minute. I didn't really know what I was supposed to do, so I just sat, waiting for him to make a move. After a minute, he slid across the seat and put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me to him and kissed me on the mouth. I didn't even know how to kiss, but when I felt his tongue pry my mouth open, I relaxed and opened my mouth and let him dig it into my mouth. I tried sucking on it, and even shoved my tongue into his mouth and that seemed to be what he wanted. He slid one hand up inside my sweater and unhooked my bra. Then he began to play with the nipple of one of my breasts.
"I began to get that warm, funny feeling between my legs, and the kissing got hotter. My cunt was getting wet and hot, and I wanted him to do a lot more.
"He slid his hand up under my skirt and down inside my panties, running his finger over the lips of it. I had hair under my arms and around my pussy, and when he shoved his finger up inside my cunt and began to massage my clit, I almost flipped with wanting him to go further.
"Take it easy, Ginny, I won't hurt you,' he kept saying. Wasn't that a laugh? If he only knew how much I wanted him to hurt me, he'd have probably driven off without me.
"I felt like I was dreaming on a cloud. I remembered the spankings from my Dad and how good they had felt. I remembered how my Mom moaned in pleasure when my Dad hit her, then fucked and mauled her, biting and scratching her body. I began to moan with pleasure as Dick used his strong fingers to dig into my cunt and into the flesh of my thighs as he spread them wider and wider, so he could go farther inside me with his finger.
"Hit me," I suddenly whispered to him.
"He drew back and looked at me, startled. His finger was still deep inside me. 'What did you say?' he asked.
"Spank me hard. I need it. I really do. I want it,' I told him. I tried to turn over so that my ass was where he could hit it, but all he did was take his hand away from my crotch, shove me aside and say, 'What are you, some kind of a weirdo?’
"I began to panic. I was so hot, and so close to what I'd wanted for so long. I guess I was half-begging when I said 'No, I'm not a weirdo. Honest. You've got to do this for me… please, Dick,… please.’
"He looked at me for a second, then shrugged and said, 'Okay, if that's what you want.' With that, he brought one hand down on my ass with a stinging smack. It sent the chills through me, it felt so good. He did it again, and I moved so that he could really get a good swing at me. 'Do it until I tell you to stop,' I told him. While he was spanking me, I tried to get his cock in my hand. I could feel it, hard and exciting, through his pants. I was going crazy, and finally I managed to unzip his pants and get it out. And then every time he would slap me, I would squeeze it and stroke it.
"We got out of the car and laid on the grass. I took my panties off and he took his pants off. I was fascinated by his stiff, throbbing prick. It was almost as big as my Dad's and I wanted to touch it, even kiss and mouth it, something awful.
"I laid on my stomach and begged Dick to spank me some more, and he did. The warm feeling in my cunt overwhelmed me. Then, as he began to hit me harder and faster, I had my first orgasm. It wasn't much, but it was better than I'd had with my fingers or any of the objects I'd used to masturbate.
"I rolled over on my back, spread my legs wide, like I'd seen my mother do, and said, 'Oh, Dick do it to me! Please do it to me!’
"He was excited too, and he crawled on top of me. I felt his prick pushing against the lips of my pussy, and I jumped around, so eager to help him get it in. But it just wasn't going in. Finally, he maneuvered me around so that my legs were spread wide, and my knees were way up, and he rammed it into me with one big lunge! It hurt and I screamed. I couldn't help it.
"Dick jumped away, pulling his cock out and looking down at the flecks of blood on his prick. 'God, you're still a virgin!' he said. 'I wouldn't have believed it, the way you've been acting. Good God!’
" 'Please try some more,' I begged. 'I want you to do it to me.’
"He tried again to push his cock into me, this time harder and faster. I felt a tearing pain in my pussy, and I had to scream again. Blood began to seep down my leg as he went deeper and deeper. It felt like he was shoving a telephone pole inside me, but it felt good, even with all the pain. I grabbed Dick and hung on, trying to help him. I was afraid I was going to faint, but I didn't want to. My pussy was beginning to tingle again, and my whole body began to get a good, warm feeling, in spite of all the pain.
"Over and over again, I could only think, 'Dick's cock is so big, he's so big and strong.' I suddenly knew what had happened that night I'd first seen my Mom suck my father's cock after he'd kept hitting her. She had wanted to be beaten, hurt, and humiliated. I knew now why she'd crawled over and sucked his cock, because I was beginning to feel the same way!
"It's hard to tell you so you'd understand, the fantastic feeling that was spreading all over me. It was like being in a different world a world I'd only dreamed about. I opened my eyes to see Dick's sweating face, lustful eyes, close to me. He was puffing and grunting and his eyes seemed ready to pop out. His body seemed to be moving automatically, as if he wasn't controlling it, and I moaned in pleasure as I felt his prick going deeper and faster, and I knew he was going to come.
"I had only thought I'd had a climax before. When I came this time, I knew that all the rest had been just 'kid stuff.' I felt it coming far off, minutes before I really had my climax. Dick began to stiffen and his stroke quickened and ended up in short, stabbing jerks. Chills ran over me, and I began to shake. I pounded my cunt as hard as I could against his body, trying to take it all inside me. That's how I felt. His prick twitched and jerked, then he shot into me. I tried to climb up on the pink cloud that was settling around me, and I made it. I begged him not to take it out yet, and I just lay there, feeling light as a feather, and sexy all over. I was sure that if anyone looked, they would be able to see my body glowing.
"Then it was over. I looked at Dick, and he kissed his cheek and asked him never to leave me. I guess it must be like that with most girls, when they've had their first real fuck when they've given their 'cherry.’
"We didn't do any more that day. I was too sore, and Dick was a little scared that he'd hurt me too much when he saw how much I had bled.
"He helped me clean the blood off me and asked when he could see me again. I told him I'd work it out, but that it probably would have to be during the day, because both my parents worked days and they weren't very permissive about me going out at night.
"It wasn't has hard as I had thought it would be. Like I said before, they never really cared about me, so when I told them I was sleeping overnight at a girlfriend's house, they never questioned me. I saw Dick about twice a week, sometimes oftener, and he really learned fast what it took to turn me on. He began to like the idea of giving me spankings. A couple of times, he got carried away, and he really beat me bad. He apologized afterwards, and said he just didn't know what had come over him he just couldn't stop himself. That bothered me a little, because I had to keep control over Dick, and also, I had to be able to trust him. I didn't want to become as completely helpless with him as my Mom was with my Dad, nor so dependent on the pain. If I had to worry about Dick not being able to stop, I was afraid it would spoil my enjoyment of sex with him.
"He brought a paddle along one time one of those wooden ones that fraternities use in their doings. We drove to our usual spot and undressed each other I always used to like to suck Dick's cock a little while I was undressing him and when I rolled over for Dick to spank me, he used that paddle. It really hurt me, so I told him to stop and to use his hand instead. But he wouldn't stop. He hit me again and again, harder each time. I got scared. My whole backside ached and stung, and I wasn't getting a charge out of it.
"I begged him to stop, but he just held me down and hit me again and again, all over my legs and my back, as well as my ass. Suddenly, my body began to feel warm all over, and I wondered if I was bleeding or maybe even dying or both. It felt as if somebody were pouring hot water all over me. The pain of the paddling seemed to drift away. It was like I was in another body, standing aside, and watching myself being beaten.
"I heard myself moaning, but it wasn't from pain this time. 'Oh, Dick… oh, Dick… ' I moaned in pleasure. 'More… harder… more… ' I never wanted him to stop. I was heading for that beautiful pink cloud again.
"I felt him stop and roll me over and spread my legs. It hurt when I put weight on my back and my ass, but it didn't really matter anymore. I felt his lips on my mouth, and I opened it and sucked his tongue into it. I could feel his soft hands caressing my body as if he adored it, and I was approaching a peak of ecstasy.
"I couldn't wait any longer. I wanted his cock inside me so badly that I wanted to scream in frustration. In desperation, I grabbed for his prick, place it against the lips of my pussy, and pushed forward with my hips. I felt the full force of his penetration and I wanted to die with the pleasure of it. I never wanted to move from that instant and that feeling.
" 'Fuck me, Dick,' I groaned.-'Don't ever stop fucking me! Promise you'll never stop!’
"He thrilled and satisfied me completely. His full weight was on me and his cock was thrusting inside me. I felt that I was nothing, compared to this great god that was fucking me. I was his slave. Then, as I approached my orgasm, I changed completely. From nothing, I became everything. I was not just myself, I was both of us all the lovers in the world! Our bodies were one we had one mind, one soul mine!
"I was a mass of nerve ends, each one exploding with pleasure. When it came, I screamed with joy and squeezed Dick tightly with my legs and my arms and the muscles of my cunt. I tried to keep him going, and he did too, but he was too exhausted, and at last, I reluctantly let him take hi amp; limp prick out of me. When I went home I must have slept a thousand hours, but I was sleeping in Dick's arms, with his cock inside me, on a big, wonderful, pink cloud.
"I went with Dick for the next year and a half, and it seemed that I had to have that wild, brutal kind of whipping. I know that it doesn't make sense to most people, that so much pain could lead to such great pleasure. I don't understand it myself because I always thought that pain and pleasure were exactly the opposite of one another. But they can blend into one overwhelming sensation of joy.
"Then I split up with Dick, and for the first couple of weeks I almost went crazy, needing him and the sexual pain-pleasure. I was only thirteen, but I could pass for eighteen by then. I was fully developed, nice breasts, curvy hips and long, shapely legs. And, I was pretty at least most boys thought I was.
"I had a few dates, but when I had to be hurt, all of the boys backed away. They thought I was a kook and they said so. I even offered to pay a couple of them, but they wouldn't do it. Finally, I stumbled across a copy of an underground newspaper and I saw the sex ads. Sure enough, there were several that advertised 'discipline sessions.’ I knew what they meant. Dick and I had talked about some of those ads after he'd graduated high school and started in college.
"I answered one and was accepted right away. I couldn't wait for the first meeting and it was more than I expected. That first night, a man used a rough hairbrush on me, and later on, after he'd fucked me good, another man used a riding whip on me, and I climaxed even better with that.
"You know the rest. I kept on with the club. I ran away from home to live with one of the fellows in the group. We'd still be going strong, if we hadn't been dumb enough to let Sylvia in the group. She was only fifteen, and when she went home one night, all marked up from a whipping, her father forced her to tell where she'd been whipped. He was sneaky, too, for he waited, let Sylvia lead him and the police to the meeting place, and the cops arrested everyone involved.
"I was sent to this home for girls. It was hell for the first few weeks, without any sex or pain. I could have gone for some cunt-sucking from other girls, but that idea just sickens me. I'm working with the psychiatrists now. I don't know if I can change, or if I really want to, but I guess I'm not normal. But I think I'd do almost anything to get out of this place and get back to where regular people are."
That is Ginny's story or at least the beginnings of a bizarre sex life. She is quite typical, in many ways, of the most extreme masochist.
Her account of her early home life clearly revealed that she thought she was a nothing because of the way her parents ignored her. Later, with Dick, she felt as if she were worthless, then when she was able to experience great joy and satisfaction, and give it to Dick, she obeyed the deep desire to be somebody. She believed that she was truly superior.
Ginny's wonder about the ability to blend pain and pleasure is common to most of us. Psychiatrists state that pain and pleasure are far from opposites, but are, in fact, quite similar in that both involve stimulation of the nerve ends.
It is the brain and the emotional makeup that determines which of these stimulations are pleasurable, and which are painful.
Further, it is unlikely that Dick could have aroused Ginny's passions as he did, with paddling, had she not been attuned to such stimulation by her earlier experiences at home. By watching her mother, Ginny had been conditioned to believe that pain was a prerequisite to sexual pleasure; thus, she was almost eager to attain such pleasures, accepting pain as a normal part of the game.
The buttocks are a part of the erogenous zone which is centered in the vagina. Also, the vagina is the seat of sexual pleasure. Thus, any stimulation of the buttocks, such as paddling or spanking, has a definite responsive effect on the vagina. First, there was a sensation of pain, then as the pleasure nerves in the vagina began to respond, there was a co-existing, dual sensation of pleasure and pain. Eventually, pleasure took over and there was no pain.
Not all persons can react this way, which leads psychiatrists to believe that there is a strong emotional tie or connection which enables the brain to transform the pain into pleasure. In a slightly different way, Dick was like this, too. He enjoyed giving the pain, or he would have stopped the relationship much sooner, or not, even have allowed it to develop at all. Also, he was often unable to stop himself, which indicates total involvement with what he was doing. His brain was translating Ginny's pain into his pleasure.
It is not as simple as we try to make it, for purposes of understanding a child like Ginny, but that is the basic principle involved.
This "pleasure from pain" syndrome is, as mentioned at the beginning of this chapter, present in all of us. In Ginny, it was nurtured and encouraged to a point where it got out of control. Ginny is now getting professional care and help with her problem.