Mom was too busy socializing with folks to pay attention to me. She was sorry I didn't feel well. No, she didn't mind if Janey drove me home in the car, and after she'd found her keys, we headed for the parking lot. Ron dragged along behind.
"I woulda taken you home, Lorrie."
Janey seemed anxious to get rid of him. "I'll see you next week sometime, Ron… okay?" He took the hint and went back through the lot brooding. Janey backed out and after some hassling was steering us towards the highway. I let the wind blow through the vent, cooling my face and thoughts. Janey drove with her bare foot stretched down to reach the accelerator. For a while neither of us said a thing, but I knew Janey was itching to hear more details. I only wished I could pretend that the whole awful thing hadn't happened.
"Don't you want to talk about it?" Janey asked.
"I… I just don't know. I still have a hard time believing that anyone could be so mean. All those guys…" I bit my lip. My shoulders trembled.
"We'll be home pretty soon, Lorrie, don't worry. Your mom said she'd get a ride home with my old lady. I'll just stay with you till you feel better."
When we swung around the corner of Maple and Main, I saw the red blazer parked in front of the Tip On Inn. My dad's car was there, too. Would it be possible that that drifter had the nerve to drink with my dad again after what he'd done to me m, my very own bedroom? I'd been raped twice in the past ten days. Twice! No, even more than that counting all those animals touching me, fucking me in the…
Janey parked by the trailer and we went in. At least my old man hadn't forgot to leave the air conditioner on. He was probably drunk out of his mind by now, palling around with Tony. After what Janey had said, I even doubted my dad now. What might he think if he knew Tony had fucked me? Would he go after Tony or blame me? I threw myself across my bed. I was starting to shake all over. Janey hovered near, a worried look on her face.
"Hey, you look like you're coming apart. You want me to get you a beer or something?"
"If there's a beer in the place, my dad's…"
"I'll look." Janey went in the kitchen, called back. "Nothing in the refrigerator but there's same booze left in this bottle on the table." I tried to calm my shaking hands by pressing them against my thighs. It didn't help much.
"Yeah, better bring me some."
Janey handed me a water glass full of bourbon and ice cubes. She watched me drink a couple of swallows and smiled when I coughed. I tried more. The warmth that spread from my belly made me feel better immediately. I was guzzling too fast, but couldn't seem to stop myself. I had to relieve the tension, the uncertainty inside.
"What did Farley do?" Janey began. "I mean when he first saw you."
I told her about talking to the bikers, the girl with red hair. Then I told her about getting away from Farley and blundering into trouble. Janey tried to look sympathetic, but I could see that she was sexually excited by my words. I was too tired to be angry and the booze had softened the sharp edges of the afternoon. Janey stretched out beside me on the bed. She'd taken off her bikini so it wouldn't get my covers wet. She glanced over at me.
"I know you've had a terrible thing happen to you and all but… well, you remember that night up at the old mansion?" I nodded. Janey swallowed, brushed fingers over her almost flat boobs. "Farley fucked me that night. In some old bedroom we found." She lowered her eyelids. "I wasn't a virgin, but it was only my second lay."
I laughed for the first time all day. "You mean the way you walk, the way you were always talking about – well, about boys and sex and everything?"
"It was all a front, I guess." She looked somewhat chastened. "I thought you'd know a whole lot more than me. I just took a look at your tits and figured I'd have to try like hell to show you up."
I took another drink of booze, set the glass back on, the table. It felt good to have that magic stuff me. It was stronger than the beer had been had been that night Phil had given me some. It was stronger than anything, stronger than the hurt inside. I saw Janey touching herself where her kinky, blonde pussy curls began, pretended not to notice.
"This must sound dirty to you," she said, "but hearing what happened when you ran into those bikers…" she took a deep, trembly breath, "…it really turns me on. I guess I think about sex about every minute of the day. I just can't help it. Lots of times in class last year I'd have to excuse myself and go to the girls' bathroom and, you know, rub myself."
"Right during the day?"
"Oh, sure. I even got where I could think of things, think of them real hard, see. Like cocks on boys. Cocks all slick-looking and hard and everything and think of them slipping in between the lips of my cunt…" Janey was breathing different now. She had to stop talking to catch up on air. "Wow, I'm kinda hot just remembering." Her fingers had curled under her pussy mound and I saw that she was sneaking her legs farther apart. I didn't know the emotions that swept me, couldn't be comfortable with them and yet… curious? I took another sip of the whiskey. I was starting to feel what I guessed was drunk. But I'd never be drunk enough to tell Janey I had watched Farley fuck her that night up at the deserted house. And I'd never admit that sometimes I finger-fucked myself, too. That was my own secret, and I wasn't especially proud of it, either. Janey's finger was worming deeper into her gash. I heard one slick cuntlip being pried open, the squish of velvet-soft petals pulled apart. Janey pointed her toes and her mouth fell open.
"I'm crazy to get fucked again," she said. "I won't let Ron screw me, though. He's the biggest blabbermouth in school and, besides, he really doesn't turn me on all that much. My mother approves of them as dates, though, so it's a way to get out of the house." She ran her finger along her swollen slit. "I wish like hell I had a car."
I was tired, boozy and loose and tired. And yet even after what had happened in the woods, Janey's words had an effect on me. Maybe I was losing my mind. Maybe…
"Lorrie?" I pretended to be asleep. Maybe Janey would shut up and let me rest, let me get my head back together. "You asleep?" I lay quiet, feeling the liquor warm in my veins. Janey got quietly up from the bed. I peeked trough my lids at her lithe and naked body as she crossed the room. She fumbled among the bottles atop my dresser until she found what she was looking for. A big bottle of baby oil. Then she was looking again, rummaging in my drawer. She came back to the bed with the baby oil and… I tried not to give myself away, tried to control my breathing. Janey had the very same brush I had used once against my heated gash. But I had only rubbed it on the outside of my unbroken cherry… Janey meant to fuck herself with it. I was certain of that.
Lying on her back, she bent her knees up and poured baby oil onto her fingers, rubbing the handle of the brush slick. Then she poured more into the palm of her hand and smeared it against the underside of her cunt mound, tilting her crotch up as she plunged her middle finger deep inside her hole.
"Oooohhhh…" It was a soft, whispery moan and she poured out more oil and dabbed it thoroughly along her parted twat lips. Then she held the brush with both hands and eased the thick, rounded handle against her cunt mouth. Her lower lip pouted with passion. Her petite toes were spread flat against the bedspread. The brush handle went inside her hole with a tiny, slick sound. I watched not wanting to watch, heard not wanting to hear. Maybe I would make sounds of awakening…
But what Janey did next caught my attention, hypnotized me. As she flicked the brush handle in and out of her cunt, she sucked the little finger of her other hand, chewed it, pursed her curvy lips around it like it might be a tiny cock. Her belly heaved. Her trim ass danced on the hard mattress. Sometimes she held the handle deep inside her cunt as she ground her crotch around in huge circles. Then she would stop and with the tip of the rounded plastic, tickled where I guessed her clit must be.
"Ohhh, it's not big enough!" It was gasped more than spoken. Janey flung the brush down on the bed and walked staggering across my room again. She looked in another drawer, shut it a little too hard and whirled to see if she'd awakened me. She went down the hall, into the kitchen. I heard her panting, bumping against things. I guess she was looking for something bigger, longer… something to stuff the aching void of her cunt. My dad caught her as he came through the front door. He was reeling drunk.
"Looka what I caught… a sweet little gal tryin' to rob the house."
"Mr. Baxter, it's me… Janey Caruthers!"
"I know who you are, you little twat…" There was a crash. I was up, sitting on the edge of the bed. The whiskey had made me woozy. Janey struggled to get loose from my dad's hands, but he circled a hefty arm around her naked middle and pulled her into the other bedroom.
"Mr. Baxter… Lorrie is…" Her words were smothered by something. I pushed myself up, tried to get to the door. It was one bad dream turning into another. I couldn't believe it. But then Al was as unpredictable as a bear when he'd been drinking.
"Nooo, Mr. Baxter! I just brought Lorrie home and…"
"What you doing running around naked, huh?" I could tell he was smothering her answer with his mouth. There were bumps as Janey's feet drummed the wall by the bed. I managed to get to the doorway and down the hall. Halfway down it a spasm of nausea crumpled me to my knees. I'd been upset and then drunk too much on an empty stomach. But I had to stop it, stop my father from trying to rape her. Janey was so thin, so weak in comparison to his work-hardened body. She was only sixteen! She was my friend, too. I thought I might pass out from the stark reality that was unwinding around me, but gagged down the bile that threatened to fill my mouth and crawled on my hands and knees.
"No! Oh, God, nooooo, Mr. Baxter! You can't, you just can't fuck me! Don't put your cock inside me! Oh, don't! Don't!"
I was only a few feet from the door to my parents' bedroom when another sharp pain went through my guts and I had to stop and lean against the wall. I could hear only the bed squeaking and the muted protests from Janey as my father tried to smother them somehow. She gave a squeal – was it of pain? I tried to get up again, couldn't, so kept crawling towards that door. I made it, leaned drunk and sick against the door frame frying to see what was happening. The shock came close to passing me out. My father, my dad… he had poor Janey under him, her slender legs spread and as I grasped the wall to keep from collapsing again, he drove forward, drove deep with his cock inside the willowy teenager's cunt.
"You, Janey… Goddamn…"
"Mr. Baxter… Ohhhhh, don't… pleeeease… Uhhhhh!" Her tan arms curved up, folded over Al's broad and hairy back. I felt like I was in the evil whirl of some sick dream. It was my own damned father fucking my new friend, the only friend I knew in Olema! Janey's legs spread, her toes pointed as my dad shoved his prick into her cunt again. It was the way she'd acted when she'd been fingering her pussy on my bed. I wiped a hand over my eyes, looked again.
"It's good, ain't it?"
"We shouldn't, Mr. Baxter… Lorrie might…"
"To hell with Lorrie. She's at the picnic with her mother." His mouth surrounded Janey's lips and they kissed. Passionately! She was kissing back! Her fingers tightened against his ribs! I shuddered, felt sick again. I could force myself into the room, I could scream. But the whiskey and the frantic fuck scene unfolding before my eyes had shocked me into a coma. I couldn't bear to see them rutting like animals. I somehow crawled a few steps back down the hall towards my room and crumpled on the rug. My eyes were shut tight, but I couldn't stop the sounds. Not even with my hands over my ears.
"You like my big cock, don't you?" Al… he was so drunk. My father!
"Mr. Baxter… I… I feel like it's so wrong. Ohhhhhh, God, we'd better not…" Janey's words came between pants, broken, gasped words.
"Like this, nice 'n' deep. You gotta like that kind of fuckin', you sweet li'l piece of ass… Christ you got a tight cunt!"
"We shouldn't…"
"How 'bout if I fuck a little faster? Yeah, yeah, like that, do ya?"
"Goddd… Goddamn! Oh, no, I don't believe this! Ohhhhhhh!"
"Tell me you like getting fucked. Your cunt's dripping like a Goddamn faucet. Tell me you like the way I'm fucking you!"
"Yeess… NO! I can't let you! Please stop!"
I clenched my eyelids tighter as Janey's words came to me but my tears started anyway. I was sobbing in the hall on my stomach as my very own father fucked my best friend. I had to do something. I tried to get up, somehow did it. But my legs wouldn't hold and I sank slowly towards the floor once again. Janey's voice was breathy with passion. She was having trouble making words now and there were only heavy grunts of pleasure from Al as he fucked her with a fury. Then Janey gave a squeal of excitement.
"I… I feel so… Ohhhh, stop or I might… I might… Uuuhhh, unhh!"
I made it to the door again, how I wasn't sure. I felt the words in my throat, heard them rasp weakly over my tongue.
"Stop… you two… it's awful!"
But the room was echoing with the groans of their passion. Al had Janey's trim little ass in both hands. It looked so strange, his strong, callused fingers thick with hair digging into her soft, white flesh. And even as he held her ass, Janey was moving. Time seemed to slow down until each second stretched agonizingly before my eyes. Al had one of her tiny boobs completely inside his mouth and as he sucked, she wallowed her shoulders, rubbed herself up to him, against him. His rough hands clutched her ass tighter than before but she danced her butt, clenching and unclenching the muscles in each cheek. I saw her belly heave against his and part, damp with their mingled sweat. Her legs were high scissored above the small of his back. And the look on her free as be fucked his cock deep in her cunt was one of pain so good it changed to the most excruciating pleasure. It was still hard to believe what I saw. Even through my boozy sickness, though, I couldn't mistake it for a nightmare. She was so little. How could she even take my dad's huge cock? My mind went swimmy as I watched him drag his prick slowly from between the juicy clasp of her petals. His rod was drenched with Janey's cunt butter and she began to squirm when he took the dark knob away from her gash, too.
"Oh! Ohhh, it feels sooooo good!"
Al laughed, thrust his cock slowly into her cunt again. I saw her thighs flatten as she scissored her legs around his middle and humped her cunt up to gulp in more meat. The hunger in her eyes, on her full pouting mouth scared me. What kind of spell was it that could make someone my age move her body like Janey was? It was as if she'd forgotten me completely.
Then they were fucking with mad, wild motions. Al hunched his hips forward and back viciously. His heavily muscled thighs and back corded with tension as Janey's blonde hair splashed in tangles across the pillow. She tossed her head, bit her bottom lip and held onto him, tucked her cunt mound up and under to keep his prick inside her snatch. I couldn't stay quiet, just couldn't.
"Ohhh, stop it… both of you…" But my voice seemed weaker than before. It was exactly like the dreams I'd had when my voice failed at the brink of danger, when no one could hear you to come and give help. Janey was coming. I knew that better than I knew anything. Her face had a lust-swollen, dazed look. Once she even looked almost towards me and I knew she hadn't seen me at all. Her feet pawed the air above Al's back.
"Yessss! Oh, fuck, I'm coming! Coommiinngg!" She pounded her frantic delirium against my father's big body. When I saw white flecks of cum collecting in the downy fur that fringed her cunt, I crawled back down the hall, dragged myself onto my bed. I sobbed for a while, dry convulsive sobs that only made the hollowness inside me hollower. Then I slept. I was only dimly aware of movements in the room. Janey putting her damp bikini back on, bending over me. I slept again, the long, exhausted sleep of confusion. My dreams were flitting images of strange beasts and even stranger women. And finally I slept like the dead. There was only blackness… nothingness.
"Are you all right, dear?" Mother's voice, her touch.
"Mom? What time is it?"
"You slept all afternoon, so I didn't wake you for supper. Then you just slept all night, too. You must have been exhausted."
I looked up into her pale eyes, her vague, familiar smile. "Janey…?"
"She went home, dear, yesterday afternoon I suppose." Mom frowned, glanced behind her. "Your father was sleeping off his liquor when I got home from the picnic. He looked terrible when he left for work this morning. You know how he hates Mondays."
I wanted to scream. To scream into her calm, accepting face the truth of what had happened. I wanted to smash her shallow believing nature. She had lived like this for years, ignoring my father's drinking spells, pretending it was the typical behavior of a male and letting it go at that. If only she knew what I knew now! The remembering, the shock came back over me like scalding rain on my skin.
"Mother! I… I…"
She passed a hand over my forehead. "What is it, baby? You look flushed. You aren't sick, are you?"
"No… no, I'm not sick. I…" But I couldn't tell her. Something stopped me. Was I afraid of seeing her bland, superficial facade crumble? Maybe. Her petty little games, her social life centered around the church in every town we moved to – all destroyed in a second. I knew that was what would happen if I told her I'd seen Al and Janey Caruthers fucking in Mama's bed. It was entirely possible that the truth would drive her mad. She didn't have the depth to handle something so completely perverse, so wrong. I didn't even know if I did. Especially when it'd come so close behind my rape by the bikers, my rape by the drifter… Tony. I hadn't forgotten his name. The dirty bastard.
"You do look a little pale. I'll fix you something to eat." Mother left me alone. I got up and pulled on a pair of jeans, a jersey. I couldn't stay in that trailer any longer. I just couldn't. To see my father, to have to look him in the eyes, knowing.
Where? I wasn't so angry that I couldn't think about practical things. I had only one relative who wouldn't mind if I appeared suddenly. My aunt on my mother's side. Aunt Betty. There'd have to be money for the bus ticket, some extra for expenses. Betty lived in Oklahoma, an all-day, all-night trip from Olema. I was shaking with anticipation. I knew what I was doing and it scared me. But I couldn't stay at home now, I just couldn't.
I got part of the money from Mom's purse, some more from what I'd been saving to buy a pair of sandals with. It still wasn't enough to get all the way to Aunt Betty's, but far enough. I could call her then, and she would come and pick me up, I just knew she would. While Mother was talking to Mrs. Caruthers on the phone, I sneaked out with a cardboard box full of my things. I knew I'd have to hurry before she started to the market and found I'd taken every last dollar from her purse. People glanced at me as I went down the sidewalk towards the center of town. Stranger… I hadn't been in Olema long enough to become a part of it and I didn't want to either. I didn't want to see Janey ever again, or Farley or Phil or any of those horrible bikers. The bus stop was in a drugstore on Main Street. I hurried along, my cardboard box banging against my knee, the money for a ticket clenched in my sweaty hand.
"Hey, where ya going in such a hurry?" The red Chevy blazer had pulled in front of me as I was about to cross the sheet. I began to tremble as I looked into Tony's blue eyes. He had on a plaid, wool shirt and his big arm bulged inside. He smiled his half-shy, half-crazy smile and rubbed his blond mustache. I found my courage again and stepped around the front of his car.
I heard him turn around and drive down the street beside me. I thought of running, of ducking into a store and then out the back into an alley. But I didn't really think all this would matter after a few more moments. I would be on a bus and heading out of town.
When I went in the drugstore, Tony parked his blazer and sauntered in, too. I ordered a Coke and sat at the fountain. The bus was due any minute.
"So you're blowin' town, huh?"
I looked at him, considered not answering, shrugged. "So what?"
"You look like an Okie with that damned cardboard box." He pulled a cigarette out of his pocket, lit it as he watched me. I felt shaky. When would that damned bus get in? Tony flicked his ashes, ordered a cup of coffee from the waitress. He was sitting two stools down. I had my box on the stool between us.
"Why don't you leave me alone," I said.
"Why don't you let me save you some bread? I'm leaving this burg, too, and I'll give you a lift."
I sipped my Coke. "I'm not going in your direction, okay?" He rubbed his mustache like he always did when he was thinking of something. He was probably thinking of a way to fuck me again… The sound of air brakes outside made me whirl on my stool. Thank God! Tony got up, came around behind me. I felt his hand on my arm.
"Don't touch me!" I hissed. The waitress glanced our way, went on wiping the counter. "I could have had you in jail! Do you know that?"
"You liked it too much to call the cops."
I stared hate at him. "I didn't. It was rape!" The waitress glanced up again. I twisted my wrist free of Tony's thick fingers. "Just find some other girl to take advantage of. I never want to see you again in my whole life!"
The bus driver came in and I bought my ticket from him and followed him out to the Greyhound. Tony leaned out the door of the drugstore smiling as I shoved my cardboard box in the rack and slid into a seat. When I looked again, he was waving. The bus snorted like some giant animal and swooshed out into traffic. I took a deep breath and leaned back in the seat. I wasn't going to start thinking of Mom and Dad and get myself to crying. I was just thinking of surviving now. Of getting to Oklahoma City and calling my aunt to come pick me up. I closed my eyes and let the droning engine of the bus calm my head.