Incest has often been called the forbidden pleasure, and no other subject is viewed with such extreme horror and repugnance, to the extent that even social and medical researchers are reluctant even to mention the subject.
A knowledge of incest is important, if we are to prevent mental and emotional and sexual illness in adults. There is no way of knowing how many thousands of people are living warped and disordered lives because of their participation in pedophiliac incestuous relationships as children; we have no way of knowing the emotional damage done by guilt, recrimination and conscience… to both children and adults.
A father and daughter pedophiliac incestuous relationships are particularly damaging to the ego of the participants.
But not always-as Carolyn, the pretty blonde daughter of an automobile salesman, says:
"I was eleven years old when my father' first began indulging in sex with me. I don't know why he chose me for a sexual partner and how it came about. One evening when Father was with me, he just pulled his prick out and showed it to me when I was sitting on the couch. ‘See how big my cock is, Carolyn!' he said proudly. ‘It's gotten that way just from looking at you. Here… go on! Touch it and make me feel good!' Of course, I was shocked because father had always been so considerate and kind. I didn't want to touch his prick and told him so. I also told him that he shouldn't be exposing himself in such a manner, and I asked him what mother would think. Father suddenly slapped me across the face and replied that mother would not be home for another week-she was visiting her sister. ‘I'll cut your goddamn throat if you say one word to her about this!' he snarled. I realized that he didn't mean he would actually cut my throat, but I knew instinctively that if I told my mother it would only cause a big fight.
"Father said, ‘Feel my prick and my balls, Carolyn.' He grabbed my hands, placing them on his organs, one on his cock and the other on his balls. I squeezed his cock and felt of his nuts with my fingers, my action making him very excited. All at once he had me stop. ‘Go into the kitchen and get a dish,' he ordered. After I returned with the dish, he sat down on the couch and told me to get down on my knees in front of him. I didn't know what Father wanted, but I soon found out when he said, ‘I want you to take the end of my cock in your mouth and suck on the head real hard. Some white fluid will shoot in your mouth and you can spit it in the dish.'
"I didn't want to take my father's prick into my mouth. It was nasty and I told him so. He glared at me and said that was what women always did to men, that my mother sucked him off constantly and even swallowed the white juice. I still refused, and began to cry. Father suddenly grabbed my arm and twisted it behind my back until I thought it would break. He hit me in the stomach with his fist so hard I almost gagged. Finally, I said I would suck his cock.
"Feeling ashamed of myself, I leaned over his lap and opened my lips. I dropped my head and felt the smooth, hard tip of his prick against my tongue. I didn't know how to suck cock then,' of course, but with my father's instructions, I believe I gave him a pretty good blow job. At least I sucked him well enough to make him come. When the first spurt came out, I almost gagged again, trying to pull my mouth away to spit the stuff out, but he held me down until he finished, then he let me spit it out into the dish.
"After that night, my father made me suck him off at least three times a week. After this had been going on for a year, he started doing it to me. I mean… eating my pussy. We never had sexual intercourse. Not that I could have prevented it if he wanted to fuck me, but he said a girl should be a virgin when she ‘married. Usually, when my father sucked my pussy he would do it for a long time, and I would have three and four orgasms.
"We continued this mouth-fucking for years and I finally ‘arrived at the conclusion that I didn't mind at all when he put his cock in my mouth. What's more, I found myself truly enjoying it when he came off that way, and I was now swallowing his come every time I blew him. Naturally, I never told my mother what we were doing. She loved him and I didn't want to see them divorced. Besides, how could I have finished school without my father's financial support? If it took sucking him off a few times a week, I didn't mind. Now, I enjoy sucking a cock much better than flicking."
The most frequent informers are daughters in father-daughter pedophilia incest. Many girls inform their mothers, who then do nothing… either out of fear, shame or other reasons. Some mothers leave the husband and inform the authorities. Some daughters tell their brothers or sisters or possibly other relatives, or perhaps •a close friend. It is not unusual for ‘victims who live in rural areas to write to relatives in another town and ask for help. Some mothers will go with the daughter to the authorities; in rare cases the daughter will go alone, of her own accord. Numerous cases come to light during or after a family quarrel; or a daughter's pregnancy will expose the relationship. The girl might become a delinquent and, when questioned by the authorities, reveal the whole sordid secret.
Sisters will report brothers more quickly than daughters will report fathers; this' is simply because sisters do not fear brothers to ‘the extent that daughters fear their fathers. In general, brother participants are detected in other ways than fathers are. Sisters who cooperate will usually not tell unless they become pregnant or are arrested for delinquency, and so forth.
After their arrest, many girls will implicate their fathers to save their own skins. Rarely do mothers go to authorities to report a son having an affair with his sister; almost never the father: Brothers will readily inform on a father in a ‘father-daughter relationship, more readily than even the mother.
"Prior to my being seduced by Daddy, the only time I can recall of his having any sexual interest in me was when I was 12 years old and he tried to teach me to dance," says Cathy. "As he held me in his arms, I could feel his hard prick touching me… on my belly. At the time I had the feeling that it was not at all proper and kept pulling myself away from him. But Daddy didn't seem to notice how reluctant I was. He kept holding me and we kept dancing, his cock touching me with each step. At the time, I told myself that he was probably not aware of,what was happening and was not really doing it on purpose; I thought Daddy might be old-fashioned and didn't' know any better.
"I also recall Daddy parading around the house in his shorts, holding the front as if he were trying to prevent his prick from popping out. He also kept a-pot in which to pee in near his bed, a habit that made my mother mad. Daddy said he kept it there because the bathroom was too far down the hall, and that he often had to pee in a hurry during the night. It also seemed odd to me that a man in Daddy's position would keep an old-fashioned commode in his bedroom. He was a man of some power in the community, being a very successful attorney. We had a large house in the better section of town, and even a small summer place on a lake, about 40 miles from the town we lived in.
"Daddy also told mother that if he got up to go to the bathroom during the night, he would become too wide awake to go back to sleep. Very vividly I remember hearing my father pee during the night. We always slept with our bedroom doors open, and that might have had something to do with my urination fantasies when I began to masturbate, when I would imagine watching Daddy pee. This might also account as to why I still enjoy the desire to see a man pee. It was all very crazy, I realized, but I would go in my parents bedroom in the daytime and look at the pee-pot, which stimulated my fantasies of seeing Daddy pee in it. I was 13 years old at that time.
"As I said, Daddy often paraded around the house in his shorts. I think that his clutching at the front of them was the real beginning of my expecting to see a man holding his cock every time I see a man's hand in front of him. Or perhaps I actually wanted to see my Daddy's cock, I don't really know. And the great effort he made to keep his prick from showing made me want to see it all the more. But one thing I do know those years of hearing Daddy pee and my imagining I was watching him were good preparation for what was to follow, when I was 14 years old.
"That summer Daddy suggested to my mother that she take my little sister and spend a month at our lake home. My mother was an artist of sorts, oil painting as a hobby, and now and then she sold a painting even-not that she needed the money, because Daddy made over fifty thousand a year. It was a matter of pride with my mother. Daddy suggested to Mother that she could get some work done by going to our summer home. ‘Cathy and I will join you in a few weeks,' my Daddy said. My mother wanted to go, but hesitated, saying she did not want to leave me to run wild, as she put it. Daddy finally persuaded her to go, after solemnly promising to look after me and not let me do as I pleased.
"My mother and little sister left the next day. That night after dinner, Daddy and I were alone in the house. Our maid had left for a movie after doing dinner dishes. You might say that's when the honeymoon between me and Daddy started. Daddy began asking all sorts of personal questions. First he wanted to know if any boy had ever made improper advances to me. When I told him no, he said that a girl my age would have to expect such things, that boys were like that and since I was very pretty, boys would always try to feel me up.
"He then said that things were better now than when he was a boy, because boys could obtain rubbers a lot easier. And he said, ‘If a man ever overpowers you and wants to put in his prick, make sure that he uses a rubber. That way you won't get yourself pregnant.'
"I wondered what the hell was going on, and Daddy continued to rattle on about boys having sex with girls and rubbers. He said that some girls even carried their own rubbers, because a lot of boys would deliberately punch holes in rubbers as a joke, then tell the girl later and worry her about getting pregnant. ‘Rubbers can also break,' Daddy said. He then told me how a rubber should be worn to prevent breakage. This was followed by a description of the cock and how it was used in the sex act. I expressed surprise when he described the head and foreskin and mentioned the testicles and said that I could not imagine anything looking like that.
"My father took this as an invitation, which it wasn't, of course, and, unzipping his pants, brought forth his big cock. I will say that at this point my reaction was one of pleasure, combined with guilt; and I could tell that Daddy was deriving emotional satisfaction from describing these things to me and showing off his cock to me. I knew that what Daddy was doing was wrong, but I was still very much interested.
"Daddy now decided to demonstrate, saying, ‘I'll skin it back for you and you can see the head. That's where all the sensation is in a man's organ.' He moved his hand up and down over his cock several times, then skinned it back, exposing the large pink head. He then took my hand and ‘placed it around the shaft, down on the base where I could feel his cock hairs tickle my hand. ‘You grasp it tightly, Cathy, and move your hand up and down; that's how a man jacks off, and you'll have to do it to your husband after you get married.' His prick felt hot and hard to my fingers as I jerked my fist up and down, and I could feel it pulse and beat as though it had a small heart of its own. Daddy had me stop short of bringing him to ejaculation; his breathing was very irregular and his face flushed. It was quite obvious that Daddy was enjoying an intensely pleasurable experience.
"I watched in amazement as his prick began to jerk and shrink. Finally It was soft and limp, looking like a big frankfurter. Then Daddy took my hand and placed it on his cock again and told me to jack him off some more. In a few seconds his prick was very hard, and he said, ‘Wait… I'll put on a rubber,' and you can see how a man shoots.' I watched him take the rubber out of its silver pack and slip it over his big prick, after which I jacked his cock very swiftly. With my fist tight around his throbbing shaft, moving up and down with fast, furious strokes, it only took him a minute or so to come.
"It was then that I realized that during the performance Daddy had been playing with me. While I was so involved in jacking him off, he had inserted his hand under my dress and had slipped a finger around my panties and into my pussy. He noticed my amazed and surprised realization that he was touching my pussy that way and quickly said, ‘Boys also kiss girls down there, and a lot of husbands do it to their wives. I'll show you how it's done.'
"Before I could open my mouth, Daddy was on the carpet on his knees, had slipped his hands underneath my dress and was removing my panties. Firmly, he spread my legs and buried his face into my pussy hair. Like an expert, he slipped his tongue through the softly curling thatch and began licking the inside of my cunt, working every inch of the walls, never missing a single spot. He sucked on my excited and quivering pussy in this manner for five minutes or so, then swirled his frantic tongue up to my inflamed clitoris, began licking and compressing his lips over it so that he could actually suck on it while his tongue drove me insane with passion. Every now and then he would reach up and cup and caress and massage my swelling breasts. Naturally Daddy's furious tongue roaming around my sensitive clitoris and steaming cunt made me extremely excited and I began moving and writhing my buttocks on the couch.
"Daddy raised his head from between my trembling thighs, his lips and cheeks wet and dripping, his eyes bright and shiny. ‘Do you like it, Cathy? Do you enjoy having your sweet pussy licked like this?' I was so sexually excited that I couldn't answer him. My throat was very dry and I couldn't get my voice to work. Smiling, Daddy went back to work, burying his face once more into my sensitive and heated pussy and started sucking me like a man gone insane. In no time at all, his wonderful mouth and tongue brought me to an explosive, delicious orgasm.
"My second experience with Daddy came the next day, or rather that night at bedtime. We both undressed for bed at the same time. No sooner had I put on my nightgown when Daddy came for me and led me into his bedroom. It all seemed very natural to me that he should do this; in fact, I think I had been expecting him to do it, and would have been disappointed if he had not. I was extremely excited, and surprisingly had, almost no feeling of guilt. I knew I was not going to tell my mother, and I knew that Daddy knew I wouldn't.
"I let Daddy take the initiative and I complied willingly with his every request. He told me to get in his bed and lie on my back with my legs wide so that my pussy was very much exposed,' and I quickly did so. Daddy placed a pillow under my naked bottom and told me to keep my legs spread nice and wide for him, as far as possible in order that he could suck my cunt easier. Daddy then said he would teach me ‘the proper method of how to fuck.' He said several times that he was doing it only to protect me against boys, as a girl would be wise to all their tricks if she bad experience. I suppose he said this to overcome the guilt of our sexual conduct. ‘I'll show you the, position the man takes in fucking,' Daddy said. ‘There are all sorts of positions, but the man on top of the woman is the most common.'
"He had me spread my thighs until he could touch the opening of my once again quivering and moist cunt with the head of his dick. I did as I was told, acting the part of an obedient child… trying to conceal my enjoyment and growing passion.
"Daddy moved his prick back and forth, and pulling back the swollen head and then letting it touch the lips of my pussy again. He explained that his cock must not enter my cunt because ‘a girl must have her cherry to present to her husband-which I thought was a rather stupid custom. When Daddy's pleasure became very intense, he ‘put on a rubber, allowing some slack at the end. ‘Remember,' he said, ‘there has to be some slack at the end to catch the come, otherwise the rubber might break.' I knew he would have a tremendous ejaculation, and I was hoping he would come an awful lot.
"He got on top of me again. Once more, Daddy requested me to spread my legs far enough apart to permit him easy access to my inflamed cunt, and this time he had forgotten all about the cherry bit, much to my enjoyment. He inserted the tip of his cock into the slippery lips of my pussy and started fucking the big head in and out. He told me to let him know immediately if I felt any pain. I told him that his cock head inside my pussy felt extremely fine. ‘Doesn't it feel real good?' he kept asking, over and over, almost as if he were pleading for a positive response from me. Maybe it was cruel of me, but I lied and said I didn't feel' anything at all. ‘I just feel your' prick moving back and forth in me,' I said. I lay there absolutely motionless, although I was burning up with desire. My lack ‘of response worried Daddy. He said he could not understand what the difficulty was, remarking that under similar conditions my mother would have been frantic and would have cried for him to push his cock all the way into her and fuck her very hard. I did' not like to hear him say that about my mother because I did not like to think that she might be able to please him more than me.
"Daddy finally shot his load. I observed, watched his every reaction. I could feel his heavy breathing, sense his increased tensions and heightened excitement. After our act of love was completed, Daddy and I went to the bathroom. He said he wanted to show me the contents of the rubber, which he had removed from his now limp cock. He emptied the rubber, into the palm of his hand, saying to me that it was the semen that helped make a baby. It looked like milk-thick milk-to me, and I told him so. Daddy did not reply. He stood by the toilet stool, skinned back his cock, exposing the head and started to pee. I watched with mesmerized fascination, my eyes fastened to the pale yellow stream gushing from the tiny slit of his prick. I actually believed I enjoyed watching him piss more than I enjoyed his sucking my pussy.
"Daddy led me back to his bed and told me to lie down again. He lay down beside me and said, ‘You know, Cathy, men and women do all sorts of things to each other. Did you know that many girls and wives take a man's prick into their mouth and suck on it? It's part of the custom of marriage. I'll show you how it's done.'
"I didn't like the idea very much of Daddy putting his big cock into my mouth and, seeing my reluctance to do so, he quickly added, ‘It's not like you think, Cathy. After the first few times, most women really enjoy sucking on a cock, and the earlier they begin sucking a man off, the sooner and the more they enjoy it. You can do it like your mother did it on our wedding night. Come with me to the kitchen.'
"I had no idea why we must go downstairs to the kitchen to perform a filthy act of sex. I was intrigued, however, and went along with, him. Once in the kitchen, Dad went to the refrigerator and took out a small can of chocolate syrup, the kind you pour over ice cream. He went over and sat on the edge of the table telling me to pull up a chair and sit down in front of, him. ‘That' way you will be much more comfortable when you suck my cock,' he said. I sat down and found that by leaning slightly in his direction I could easily slide my mouth over his hard prick and even play with his hairy balls at the same time-as Daddy suggested when we came down the stairs. I saw no way I could refuse without offending him, and I did want to please him as much as mother did. I decided I would think of him peeing as I sucked on the head of his cock.
"I had to ask him when I was supposed to begin. Once he understood that he would not have to plead with me, knowing I was willing to suck him off, Daddy's face lit up in a big appreciative grin. ‘I'll show you how,' he said. "But let me get my prick ready for you first, like I did your mother on our wedding night.'
"Daddy skinned back the head of his cock and slowly tilted the can of syrup to let the dark gooey stream drip on the swollen tip-just enough to cover the head and-as he said, flavor it. ‘You can imagine you're eating chocolate candy when you suck me,' Daddy said. ‘And you can either swallow my come or spit it out in the sink. It will only be a spoonful. It won't be bad at all. Why… you won't even taste my come because of the chocolate.'
"I figured that I might as well begin and get it over with and, holding to the base of Daddy's big prick with one hand and feeling of his hairy balls with the other, I leaned over and let the chocolate covered head of his cock slip into my mouth. The sensation was odd… not so much from the feeling of the smooth cock head in my mouth for the first time, but from the taste of the chocolate. Of course, it was because the chocolate was on my Daddy's prick that made it seem odd to me.
"I sucked the head of his prick as hard as I could, at the same time following his instructions to lick my tongue around the head as I sucked, especially on the little pee hole there. Daddy had his come in a few minutes, and it was certainly more than a spoonful-more like a cupful! That too was rather strange-the taste of chocolate-flavored come. And there was some taste of saltiness. However, the entire cock sucking experience was not half as bad as I had anticipated. After it was over and Daddy was washing his cock, he said, ‘One time your mother had me put maple syrup over the head of my cock before she sucked it. We'll have to try that flavor sometime.'
"We never did try that, but I slept with him every night until the one before my mother's return. That was the night I told him about my masturbation fantasies. It excited him very much to know that I had been feeling of myself while picturing him taking a pee. I told him how I had felt when I watched him pee that first night-about how I almost experienced an orgasm just from watching him.
"Somehow, the talk came around to my overwhelming urge to watch him take a pee before I went back to my own bed. Daddy said that since I masturbated while thinking of this, then it would be better for me if I would feel myself while he pissed. We went into the bathroom and he stood over the toilet bowl, holding his cock. I sat down on the floor, spreading my legs wide and started fingering my already inflamed clitoris, my eyes blazing as I watched him start to pee. I was tremendously excited, and I suppose it was exciting for Daddy to see me masturbating, too. He let the golden stream go, aiming into the toilet bowl, but his eyes were on my furiously rubbing fingers. A warm drop of his pee splashed on my naked breasts, and I shivered with a sudden excitement. Then, without either of us saying a word, Daddy suddenly aimed the yellow stream at me, the pee splashing over my titties and running down my body. I was writhing in passion, my lips hanging loose and I was panting as the orgasm grew and grew inside me. Suddenly, I found Daddy was aiming the stream at my face, and I opened my mouth as wide as possible, letting him pee right between my lips. I began to have a series of small, intense orgasms as he peed into my mouth, and I was swallowing the drops as fast as I could, my whole naked body shuddering deliciously as I experienced one orgasm after the other.
"Alter my mother returned from the summer home, there were a few instances in which Daddy and I enjoyed each other-usually in the car, when he would drive me to school. He would pull up my skirt and play with my cunt while I toyed with his cock. Sometimes we would finger each other to climax this way, but the way I enjoyed it most was having him pee in my mouth. Sometimes he would drive me into the countryside, and there in the fields I would masturbate while he pissed in my mouth. Usually I wouldn't put my lips around the head of his cock when we did this, but sometimes I would, and it was just like drinking from a garden hose. Naturally, this didn't give Daddy much pleasure, so I would suck him off when he finished his pee. We didn't need the chocolate anymore, because I had grown fond of tasting his come when he squirted it into my mouth.
"I finally had to stop enjoying those sex things with Daddy, because the things we were doing produced guilt in me. About six months ago, I refused to let him touch my pussy when he was taking me to school, telling him firmly that we had to stop, that no longer would I be able to cooperate. Daddy accepted that •as my final word on the subject, and since then has never approached me sexually again."