Julianne and Emma turn the corner. Emma is wearing a woollen hat with ear-flaps that tie under her chin.
Tugging at her mother’s arm, she complains that she’ll be late.
‘And whose fault is that?’ says Julianne. ‘Next time, get out of bed when I tell you to. And get dressed . . . and eat your breakfast . . . and brush your teeth . . . and put on your shoes.’
Emma spies me and runs into my arms. I try to lift her above my head and get about halfway. She’s getting too big to be thrown into the air.
Julianne wants to know what’s wrong, but she doesn’t ask. She’ll wait until Emma is in school. We both get a hug goodbye and a wave at the gate. Emma milks every moment, turning and waving, turning and waving.
‘What’s up?’ asks Julianne.
‘I didn’t know Charlie had been babysitting for Gordon Ellis.’
The statement sounds too much like an accusation. Straight away, she raises her defences.
‘What’s the problem?’
‘I don’t want Charlie in his house. I don’t want her alone with him.’
‘You’re not making any sense.’
‘We can’t talk here.’
Pulling her further along the street, away from the school, we stop at a picnic table near the green, overlooking the church. A car with a blown muffler rumbles around the corner and I feel my heart race.
‘OK. Now what’s this about?’
I tell her about my trip to Edinburgh, about Caro Regan’s disappearance and Gordon Ellis marrying a former student, a schoolgirl, and moving away.
‘Natasha Ellis is barely eighteen. She was sixteen when she married and only thirteen when she met Gordon.’
‘What about Billy?’
‘He’s not Natasha’s son. Caro Regan disappeared the day before Billy’s second birthday. That was four years ago. She hasn’t contacted her family or tried to see Billy, or applied for welfare or withdrawn money from an account. The police think she’s dead.’
Julianne’s fingers rise to her face, partially concealing her mouth.
‘And they think Gordon . . . ?’
‘Yes.’
‘Does the school know?’
‘Ray Hegarty saw Gordon Ellis kissing Sienna and made a complaint to the school, but the allegation was dismissed because Sienna denied it. I talked to Mr Stozer on Monday but he called it a misunderstanding and a harmless schoolgirl crush. He’s wrong. I think Gordon Ellis was sleeping with Sienna.’
‘You said she was pregnant!’
‘Yes.’
‘You have to tell the police.’
‘I need Sienna to confirm it.’
Julianne turns her head and glances back towards the school. Her tone softens. ‘Are you sure you’re right about this?’
‘Even if I’m wrong, I don’t want Charlie going anywhere near Ellis.’
‘Do I stop her going to school?’
‘No.’
I hesitate, not wanting to frighten her. How much should I say? Should I tell her that someone ran me off the road - or about what happened to Gunsmoke? This is why she left me. Every time I get involved in a case like this the stakes become too high.
‘Are you taking your medication?’ she asks, looking at me closely.
‘Yes.’
A hand reaches towards me and her fingers brush against my cheek. Then she steps closer and puts her arms around me, pulling my head to her chest. I stay very quiet, listening to her heart beating. Then suddenly step back, breaking contact with her.
‘What’s wrong?’ she asks.
‘Nothing.’
‘Have I upset you?’
‘I’m fine. I just don’t think we should . . .’
‘Should what?’
She’s waiting. I can’t look at her face.
‘Every time you touch me it feels as though you’re leaving me all over again.’
‘That’s not my fault, Joe.’
‘I know.’
She looks at my expression and understands that something has altered between us. Turning her head, she gazes at the bare limbs of the oak trees in the churchyard.
‘I have to go. I’m due in court. You’re going to fix this.’
‘I’m going to try.’
She spins and walks away, stepping around the puddles. Perhaps it’s my imagination, but I think I glimpse a flash of wetness in her eyes.