Outside, in the freezing darkness, his breath came quickly as panic took his mind. He could rouse the apothecary, but he wouldn’t come for a lad with no money. Who else was there?
John might be able to help. He fixed on the thought and began to run, slipping and sliding as he tore out of the court and down Briggate. Please God, he asked, let him be home.
At the house he pushed open the door and ran in, his footfalls loud and urgent. He hammered on the wood, silent prayers slipping from his head to heaven.
Sedgwick answered finally, his face slack with sleep, hair wild.
‘It’s Frances.’ The words tumbled out. ‘Help me. She’s bleeding.’
‘Come in, lad,’ Sedgwick said.
‘No, you have to come,’ Josh pleaded. ‘She’s bleeding.’
The deputy pulled him inside by the hand. A candle illuminated the room softly. His woman was in bed, her sharp eyes focused. A small boy slept on a pallet.
‘Where’s she bleeding?’ Sedgwick asked.
‘There.’ Josh pointed.
‘The baby?’
He nodded and saw Sedgwick exchange an anxious look with the woman.
‘She needs someone,’ he told the deputy.
‘I’ll come,’ the woman said quickly, climbing out of bed and beginning to dress, taking quick, calm charge. ‘John, you get next door to watch James then go fetch the apothecary.’
Sedgwick nodded, took Josh’s address, and put on his clothes.
‘Show me where she is. You’re Josh, aren’t you?’ She wrapped a heavy shawl around her shoulders. ‘I’m Lizzie, love.’
Outside she hurried along, holding on to Josh’s arm for support on the ice. ‘What did you say your lass’s name was?’
‘Frances.’
‘We’ll take care of her,’ Lizzie said reassuringly. Josh blinked back his tears and believed her. She seemed so calm and capable.
Their footsteps clattered on the rickety stairs and he opened to door to the room. Frances lay where he’d left her, eyes closed, face white as bone.
He watched as the woman walked over to the bed, smiling gently.
‘Hello love,’ she said, ‘I’m Lizzie.’ She stroked the girl’s head and turned to Josh. ‘Build up the fire,’ she ordered, ‘and get your lass something to drink. She’ll be parched.’
He did as he was told, putting valuable coals on the hearth and watching the glow rise to a small blaze as he poured some small ale into a cracked mug he’d taken from the back of an inn.
Lizzie was examining Frances and he couldn’t look. He couldn’t bear to see the blood caked and cracked on her, or the way her legs seemed splayed like a corpse. He was scared. The woman was talking quickly and quietly to the girl, her words too soft to hear.
Finally she stood and drew Josh into a corner away from the candle’s light. She put her hands on his shoulder. He could feel his body shaking under her touch.
‘John’ll be here with the apothecary in a minute.’ She sighed. ‘She’s lost the babby, but I’ve seen worse. There’s no meat on her. She couldn’t nourish what was growing inside. Do you understand that?’ Her voice was warm. He nodded. ‘How old is she?’
‘I don’t know,’ he answered truthfully. ‘Will she. .?’
‘Die, you mean?’ Lizzie raised her eyebrows. ‘God willing, she’ll recover. The apothecary will give her something to make her sleep. That’s what she needs now, rest so she can heal. Can you look after her?’
‘What do I need to do?’ he asked eagerly.
She ruffled his hair. ‘I know you’re a Constable’s man, Josh, but you’re nobbut a boy.’ She paused. ‘Look, tomorrow we’ll get a couple of lads to carry her over to our room. I can take care of her until she’s on her feet again. How’s that?’
‘But-’ he began, before realizing he had nothing to say. He couldn’t care for Frances, he was gone more than he was here. He looked at Lizzie, her mouth quite relaxed, her eyes warm. ‘Yes,’ he agreed.
‘Good lad. Don’t worry, you can come over and be with her all you like.’
The door opened and Sedgwick arrived with the apothecary, a wizened old man who was wheezing from the climb. He shrugged off his greatcoat, showing how he’d thrown on his clothes when the deputy roused him. The tiny room seemed suddenly full of people.
‘She’s lost a lot of blood,’ Lizzie told him.
‘Skin and bone,’ the apothecary muttered.
‘She’s strong. But she needs sleep.’
The man nodded and rummaged in the bag he’d brought, finding a small bottle and a battered spoon. He fed Frances a little of the liquid.
‘Thank you,’ Josh told Sedgwick, and the deputy smiled and shrugged self-consciously.
‘Thank Lizzie, lad. She knows what to do. You can trust her.’
The woman came and touched the deputy on the arm, taking him into the corner where she’d talked to Josh. He watched as she whispered insistently into his ear. John’s eyes widened and for a moment he looked as if he was about to protest, then just nodded his agreement and returned to the boy.
‘I can’t afford to pay,’ Josh said.
Sedgwick put his arm around Josh’s shoulders. ‘You don’t have to. You work for the Constable, the apothecary looks after us for nowt. You just take care of your lass tonight. I’ll have a couple of the men take her to our place in the morning.’ He squeezed Josh’s thin flesh affectionately. ‘Don’t worry, lad. Lizzie says she looks as if she’ll be fine. She’s just going to need some time.’
Relief filled him. He began to cry. He bowed his head and covered his eyes with his hands, but he knew he was hiding nothing. The years of living by his wits and his sly fingers slid away and he felt like a small child again, helpless and utterly lost.
Arms hugged him tight and Lizzie’s breath was soft against his skin.
‘You have a good cry, love.’ Josh buried his face against her shoulder and let the tears come, tasting their salt in his mouth, while hands stroked his back like the mother he couldn’t remember.
‘Does Frances own another shift?’ she asked.
He didn’t know. Home was just a place he saw when he wasn’t working. Frances kept it warm, had food on the table, a quiet smile on her face and loved him. He gave her his wages. That was all he knew of the place. He shrugged.
‘What about another sheet, then?’ Lizzie said. ‘Do you have one of those?’
He shook his head. Lizzie gently pushed him away and kissed his forehead.
‘Never mind, eh? We’ll make do. I’ve cleaned her up a little, so you just watch her tonight. Josh?’ He raised his eyes to meet hers. ‘If she starts to bleed again or if she seems worse, just come and get us.’
‘Yes,’ he replied. ‘Thank you.’
‘I’ll get the men over to move her first thing,’ Sedgwick told him. ‘Don’t come into work until they’ve been.’
They left, the candle flame swaying wildly in the draught from the door, shadows dancing madly on the walls. He sat on the bed, trying to keep his eyes away from the dark bloom on the sheet, and took Frances’s hand. She was asleep, her breathing low. She seemed fragile and brittle under his touch, as if death still had hold of her other hand.
He loved her. He’d said the words for the first time in his life, and understood what they meant. He’d sit and watch her all night and keep her safe.