Evan Guinn followed every direction to the letter. They’d led him from the tiny hut, flanked by the two guards who had nearly shot him, to a spot about twenty yards away that looked like it had been turned into a movie set. They’d cut a swath out of the dense green foliage to expose a large rock, which had been painted with stripes of white. The ground all around the rock had been painted white, too, and sprinkled with what appeared to be that fake plastic snow stuff that you put around Christmas decorations.
Through words and gestures, they directed him to stand in front of the rock. They handed him a copy of The Washington Post and told him to hold it just so under his chin, and pantomimed for him to smile. The squat man from the shack did all of the communicating while taking direction from a darker skinned man dressed in black slacks and a long white shirt who held a cell phone camera at arm’s length, composing his shot, Evan assumed. Clearly, they wanted to make the picture look like he was somewhere cold, but he was sweating like a pig and barefoot. Who was going to believe it?
He’d seen this trick with the newspaper before in movies about kidnapping victims. They used the headline on the paper as proof that the victim was still alive so that they would pay the ransom. He felt a sudden flash of fear. Who was going to pay ransom for him? Mom was dead, Dad was in jail, and there wasn’t anyone else. Nobody had anything of value to trade for him. There wasn’t a reason in the world to keep him alive.
But apparently there was. They’d gone to a lot of trouble to get him here to wherever the hell he was. And where was that, exactly? Mexico? South America?
Jesus, how long had he been asleep? South America and Mexico were both a long way from Virginia. Geography was one of his worst subjects, but he knew that much.
What were they going to do with him? Another jolt of fear. He’d been alone in the company of sweaty men before, with the last foster family before moving to RezHouse. He knew what they were capable of, and the fact that he saw no women around made his stomach churn. Evan had meant what he’d said to Father Dom during one of his counseling sessions: He’d never allow himself to be used that way again. The last time, he was little and didn’t have the strength to break their bear hugs.
He was nearly fourteen now, though, and he knew a thing or two that he hadn’t before. He knew what was worth killing for, and what was worth dying for. More to the point, he knew what wasn’t worth living after.
The whole picture-taking process took less than ten minutes.
Apparently satisfied with the results, Shack Man beckoned Evan away from the rock and handed him a pair of well-worn short pants of an indefinable color. Somewhere between gray and black. Evan wondered if they’d once been white.
“You…wear,” Shack Man said, and he pointed to the shack. Then he prattled about something while he made a sweeping motion in the air up and down the length of the boy’s body.
“Huh?”
Shack Man pinched the shoulder of his sweater and tugged lightly. “ Esto… sweetshirt?”
Evan processed it. “Sweater?” he guessed.
Shack Man nodded and pointed to Evan’s jeans. He searched for a word. “Give back.”
Evan didn’t hesitate for a moment to shed the sweater and turtleneck. He pulled them over his head, and handed them over, leaving him bare-chested. He got that he was supposed to return the pants, too, and for that he walked back to the shack. He noted for what it was worth that the guards didn’t follow him this time.
Inside, he changed into the shorts and lay back down on the plank door, after folding the blue jeans and using them for a pillow. He draped his forearm over his eyes and took a deep breath. I will not cry, he told himself. It doesn’t accomplish anything, and it shows weakness.
Worse, the weakness hands power over to the people who want to hurt you.
Who were these people? And what were they planning to do with him?
What were they planning to do to him?
His stomach fluttered, and he closed his eyes tighter. You have to learn to cope with the reality of what is, he heard Father Dom telling him. When bad things happen to us-especially as children-we want there to be a reason. We search so hard for meaning in yesterday that we can lose sight of today. Today is all that matters. Today and tomorrow. Yesterday is past and needs to be shoved aside until the Lord makes it our business to understand.
Lying in this sweaty stinkhole, he felt homesickness sliding in. He felt sadness knocking at the door. They were the same sensations that threatened to suffocate him in the first months after the social workers finally listened. He had been nine years old then. It was hard not to allow the darkness in; but maybe it was supposed to be hard.
“What’s happening to me?” He spoke just loudly enough for him to hear his own voice.
When God wants you to know, He’ll tell you.
Evan brought his arm down quickly and whipped his head to the side, expecting to see Father Dom standing there. His voice had been that clear in his head.
When He wants me to know, He’ll tell me.
A sense of utter clarity washed over him, flooding away the darkness.
He didn’t have time for a pity party. Evan needed to grow a pair and embrace the reality of today. That meant he had to wrap his arms and his mind around the fact that he’d been taken from a place he liked and shoved into a place that smelled like mold and was hot as hell. He had no friends, so that meant he was on his own.
How do you run away if you don’t know where you are to begin with? You’ve got to start from someplace, and Evan didn’t even have a compass point to shoot for-as if he had a compass in the first place, or would know how to use it if he did.
His first decision, then, was easy: He’d wait things out for a while. So far, he saw no reason to tempt people to kill him. If the time came to risk death, Evan figured he would know it, and he would make the big decisions then. For the time being he’d just hold tight and-
His door slammed open, revealing Shack Man silhouetted against the harsh light of the day. “Come,” he said, beckoning with his whole hand. “Time to go.”
“Go where?” Evan asked.
“ Appurate,” the man said. Evan knew “hurry” when he heard it. He left the jeans where they lay, folded on the plank, and he walked cautiously to the door. As he approached, he saw that a beat-up four-wheel-drive vehicle was waiting for him.