“She knew she would probably never see you again. That Duane would surely come after her. And then one night I made the decision to go through with it… I came back to the motel to find she’d been drinking again and taking pills. She was angry and talking shit. It was our fault that she couldn’t be with you. She told me everything she knew about the business I had going with the sheriff and Duane-enough, I thought, to get us into some real trouble. Instead of taking them away, I gave her more pills and vodka. And after she calmed down and stopped screaming at me, I waited until it was late and took her down to the pool. We talked and I told her the last week had been one of the happiest in my life. When it was time I asked her to forgive me and she seemed to nod her head as if she wanted me to help her die.”
Ann was crying. “Then why did you lie to me? You said she’d committed suicide.”
Cyclops edged closer, dead branches snapped below him. “Because I wanted to make things easier on you.”
“No. You wanted to protect yourself. You’re a coward. You want to believe it because it makes you feel better.”
“I’m afraid there’s nothing that will make me feel better. Your mother has made that impossible. She’s with me wherever I go. I’ll never be free of her.”
“So what stopped you from killing me before?”
“I came close once a few years ago … I sat in your bedroom and watched you and not a soul in the house even knew I was there except for the cats. But I left you a gift instead. The locket you’re wearing now. I took the picture of your mother that’s in it. She was standing on a cliff in Big Sur.”
“No, that’s impossible. I found it in a box of her things that Aunt Kate kept in a storage shed she rented in Knife Cape. She hoped that some day detectives would go through them and find the piece of evidence they needed to make an arrest…”
“You’re surprising me, Ann. Didn’t you wonder why you hadn’t seen your mother wear it before?”
“At first I thought it was hers. And then I realized Aunt Kate must have done it. She knew I’d sometimes go to the storage shed without telling her. She must have thought it would make me feel better somehow.”
“She was wearing it the night she died. I bought it for her from a silversmith in Tijuana. She had a picture of you in her purse and she cut it out and put it inside. When I brought the necklace back and hid it in the box I put the picture I’d taken of her in it.”
He must be telling the truth, Ann thought. She’d once removed her mother’s picture and had seen her own below it-blurred, she’d thought, from water damage. She remembered the chills it had given her.
Her arms were getting tired. She wouldn’t be able to hold up the.38 much longer. So much for pissing him off. This obviously isn’t going to work.
You still haven’t answered me. Why didn’t you kill me the last time?”
“After I listened to your sleep-talk I couldn’t go through with it. It made me sick.”
“Sleep-talk?”
“A skill my mother taught me long ago.”
“What is it?”
“You wouldn’t understand … It would take too long to explain.”
“Try me.”
“All of us have a voice that talks while we are asleep, one that we are not aware of. It’s another language and takes years of training to understand. But if you do learn it, you’ll find out many things about a person. And it doesn’t stop there. You can also learn things about the future as well as the past.”
“What did my sleep-talk tell you?”
“I heard your mother’s voice coming from your mouth. She was talking from the other side…through you. While you slept.”
“You heard my mother? He’s only trying to scare you, Ann. Trying to get the dogs going. Don’t let him distract you.
“She had already changed so much by then. In fact, I almost smothered you with a pillow to quiet her.”
“What did she say?”
“She told me that the only way she’d ever let me rest is if I killed you, sent you over to her.”
“You’re lying… She’d never say that.”
“You don’t understand. She’s not the same woman that you or I knew before. All your mother wants is to have you back, no matter what the cost. And when I told her I didn’t take children from the world, she became obsessed with making my life a living hell.”
“But now you’ve changed your mind. About killing me.”
“Of course I have. Look at what your mother has turned me into? I live like an animal because of her.”
“You got off easy.”
Ann pulled the trigger and Cyclops finally dropped the knife.