"Forget the part where you think she's crazy."
"Forget it? Why?"
"Because if she's crazy, then people feel sorry for her and if they feel sorry for her, then it's just another story about some pathetic has-been TV star. But if she willfully and coldly set out to do in all these people-ape shit is the word I'm looking for here, Tobin."
"That's two words."
"Whatever. Ape shit is what our readers will do. AGING PRIME TIME QUEEN KILLS TO KEEP HER SHAME SECRET. It needs some work but it's a good peg. You earned your dough, pally."
"Thanks."
"Hey, you get seven grand and you sound miserable."
"I am miserable. I happened to like Susan. And what's this seven grand stuff?"
"Expenses."
"What expenses?"
"I told you already. Phone calls and stuff."
"What's 'stuff?'"
"Jesus, all right. We should be celebrating and we're haggling. Seventy-five hundred then."
"First you said ten, then you said eight, and now you're saying seventy-five hundred."
"Just get some good pictures, OK?"
The editor of Snoop, who probably not only watched "Celebrity Handyman" but liked it, hung up.
Tobin went into one of the ship's eight bars.