That evening, Saewulf’s men built fires on the beach and roasted goats. It was the first meat I had tasted since we fled the caliph’s palace and I forced myself to eat it cautiously, though I could have devoured it in a mouthful. I licked the fat from my fingers while Nikephoros and Aelfric talked with Saewulf. He had avoided Nikephoros’ question, insisting we could not speak before eating; and once we were seated around the fire he had asked to hear our entire story. Nikephoros told it, with some explanation from Aelfric in English but mostly in Greek, for Saewulf’s voyaging profession had taught him many languages. For all his barbaric appearance he made a charming host: he filled our cups with beer, cut us the choicest pieces of meat, and gave us fresh cloaks and tunics to replace the ill-fitting novices’ clothes we wore.
When Nikephoros had finished his account, he fixed his gaze on Saewulf. ‘That is our story. But why has an English seafarer beached his ships on these shores, at this time of year? You are a long way from safe harbours.’
‘So are you.’ Saewulf grinned; the goat-grease on his teeth gleamed in the firelight. ‘I came to fish.’
Nikephoros gestured towards the ships, though all we could see of them were high prows sweeping up into the darkness. ‘Are those fishing boats?’
‘For me — yes.’ Saewulf leaned forward. ‘I was in England when I heard that the Pope had preached his holy pilgrimage — ’
‘I thought all of your people had been driven out of England when the Normans invaded,’ I interrupted.
‘Even William the Bastard could not kill every Englishman. He needed us to plough his fields and quarry stone for his castles. And sail his ships.’ He shrugged. ‘I carry many cargoes, but I have never profited from carrying a grudge.’
Aelfric stirred. ‘Sigurd Ragnarson would disagree with you.’
‘Which is why I left the Varangians.’ He saw my look of surprise. ‘Yes, Demetrios Askiates, I have seen your city and stood beside your emperor, in the palace and on the battlefield. As close as I am to you now. But do you know what I realised? That if I was to live under a foreign king, it might as well be in my own country.’
‘Even though he raped that country?’ Aelfric murmured.
Saewulf gave a harsh laugh. ‘Better that than living in perpetual exile, brooding on injustices that will never be undone and pretending that I can atone for my country’s shame by giving my life for a king who cared nothing for it. That was why I left the Varangian guard — it was like living in an open grave.’
‘I wonder, was it as hard for you to live under the king who murdered your family?’
‘Much harder. But wasting my life with anger would have been too easy.’
There was no amusement on Saewulf’s face now. He glared at Aelfric, and the Varangian returned the gaze, both men trembling like drawn swords.
‘Even so, you are a long way from England.’ Nikephoros spoke with forced calm.
Saewulf spread out his hands, peering at them as if looking for signs of weakness. ‘I am no longer a soldier. I am a merchant.’
Mercenary, I thought I heard Aelfric mutter, but the crackling fire drowned it out.
‘But I am still in the business of war. Armies need food and weapons. New conquests open new opportunities.’ He nodded to the Saracen camel-drivers, who sat by their own fire a little way down the beach. ‘And in wartime, luxuries become dearer.’
‘And tax-collectors less vigilant,’ said Nikephoros.
The knowing smile returned to Saewulf’s face. ‘New opportunities.’
‘And if the opportunity came to earn gold and the emperor’s favour?’
Saewulf scowled. ‘I told you: I do not serve your emperor any more.’
‘But you sail in his waters, where his fleets patrol. One day, it may matter that he looks kindly on you.’
‘And the gold?’
Nikephoros spread open his cloak. ‘You see I have nothing — not now. But when I reach home — ’
‘No.’ Saewulf cut through Nikephoros’ calm persuasion. ‘I cannot take you to Constantinople. It would take weeks, and with the winter winds against us we might not even be able to enter the Hellespont. You offer me an opportunity, Greek, but I think there are greater profits to be made elsewhere.’
Under the chill of his words, the fire seemed to dim and the night breeze grow sharper. Aelfric turned away in disgust, as if he had expected no less, while I held myself still. Only Nikephoros remained unaffected.
‘I do not want you to take me to Constantinople.’
Saewulf looked surprised. ‘Where, then?’
‘We are going to Antioch.’
Saewulf rested his chin in his hands and stared into the fire. ‘And what will you do there? The last time I passed by Antioch, Franks and Normans controlled it.’
‘We will prise them out,’ said Nikephoros confidently, ‘and put them on the road to Jerusalem. With the caliph turned against us, there is no alternative.’
The next day we loaded the Saracens’ cargo onto the ships, and set sail for Antioch.