Slam! Slam!
“Who’s the man?” he shouted.
“You are, baby!”
“Who?”
“You are, Derrick! You’re the only man for me!”
Slam! Slam! Slam! Slam!
I was sure my headboard was about to break, the way it was slamming up against the wall. Derrick was on top of me, pushing himself inside me with all his might, and I was screaming at the top of my lungs. Only I wasn’t screaming because it felt good. I was screaming because it felt like he was gonna rip me wide open. He was having such a good time, he didn’t even notice that I was in pain. As far as I could tell, he thought my screams of agony were cries of pleasure and he was doing his job. Every time I opened my mouth, he pushed himself deeper and harder inside me. I wanted to tell him what the grimaces on my face really meant, ask him to slow down, and at least be a little less rough, but I was afraid I’d hurt his feelings. And that was the last thing I wanted to do, especially since he’d been waiting for three years to make love to me.
I’d gone to pick Derrick up right after I left Dylan’s house. Oh, I struggled with the idea the whole ride up. I even pulled over a couple of times and contemplated turning around and going back to Dylan. But each time I pulled over, I’d think about Monica being pregnant and the way Dylan kissed her, and I’d get back on the road headed west, convinced that being with Derrick was the right thing to do.
I still wasn’t sure about my feelings for Dylan. I wasn’t sure if I loved him or hated him. The pain was too raw for me to really deal with yet. But when I finally got up to Roanoke, I was glad I hadn’t turned around. All my uncertainty vanished when the gates of that prison opened and Derrick walked out a free man. I wanted to cry, I was so happy. There he was, standing in front of the car, looking as fine as ever, showing off those sexy dimples of his.
“What you gonna do, baby? Sit in that car, or come over here and give your man the love he’s been missing?” Derrick stood by my car door with his arms wide open. I jumped right from my seat into his arms. This was the first contact we’d had in three years without guards breathing down our necks, watching our every move. I was so elated! I held him as tight as humanly possible. He was mine again, and as God was my witness, I was never gonna let him go. I can’t ever remember being that happy before in my life. All the doubt I had about our relationship vanished with just one kiss. I guess that deep down I had never really imagined this day would come. Maybe that was why I had let myself start to fall for someone else. But now that I was back in Derrick’s arms and we had our whole future ahead of us, I wasn’t about to let go.
Derrick and I stood in the same spot for at least half an hour, and our lips barely parted in all that time. There was so much pent-up passion and desire between us, it was incredible. I wanted to make love right then and there. I begged him to let me find a secluded spot where we could park, but he told me he’d waited three years to make love to me and he wasn’t about to cheapen it by doing it in a car. That made me feel so special that any thoughts of another man, including Dylan, went right down the drain.
When we got back to the apartment, Derrick carried me over the threshold like we were newlyweds. As soon as the front door closed, we were headed straight for the bedroom. He laid me on the bed and started to slowly take off his clothes. He’d always had a nice body, and all those years working out in the prison gym had defined his muscles even more. I almost didn’t wanna wait. He was so damn sexy and I was so damn hot for him, I just wanted him to hurry up and get naked. I couldn’t believe that after all that time behind bars, he was being more patient than I was. In fact, I don’t ever remember him being as attentive as he was that night during foreplay. The Derrick I remember wasn’t all that creative in bed, and he definitely never gave me oral sex. All those years in prison must’ve given him lots of time to dream up new ways to please me. He took his time, kissing every part of my body until I literally begged him to make love to me. He obliged and entered me with one long stroke.
I would love to say it was the greatest experience of my life, and I’m sure Derrick thought it was. But I hadn’t felt that much pain since I lost my virginity.
I was hurting so bad I tried every trick in the book to help him finish his business; I was screaming, scratching his back, faking orgasms, but he just kept going and going like he was the fucking Energizer bunny. Finally I just gave up and lay there, taking the pain. Would you believe that’s when he finally finished?
“Ahhhhhh, shit. Baby, I’m about to come!” he shouted.
His body became rigid and he lunged forward in a spasm. I was sure he had finished his business when he collapsed on top of me and moaned.
“Damn, that shit felt good,” he huffed. “Wasn’t that shit good, boo? I’ve been dreamin’ about doin’ that to you for three years, baby.”
It wasn’t exactly the same kinda sex I’d been dreaming about all this time, but I smiled at him, just glad the ordeal was over.
A few minutes later, he was curled up next to me, snoring. I watched him sleep for a while as I stroked his soft, black hair. After the throbbing between my legs subsided, I actually enjoyed the feeling of tying naked next to my man. I had missed this kind of intimacy.
A knock on the front door interrupted my thoughts, and I panicked. Maybe it was Dylan. After all, I had left his house in a huff, and it would be just like him to try to mend fences. Even if I did want to clear the air with him and let him know I was moving on, I knew I couldn’t talk to him now. Not with Derrick here. I eased myself outta bed, the whole time praying I wouldn’t wake Derrick. I didn’t know what I was gonna do, but I did know I had to get rid of Dylan in a hurry. Fortunately, when I looked through the peephole I was able to relax. I didn’t have to deal with Dylan quite so soon. I opened the door and smiled at my sister.
“Girrrrllll, you just don’t know. I ain’t never been so happy to see you in my entire life.”
“That’s nice. Now, can you get out the way? It’s starting to rain out here.” Stephanie pushed her way past me. “It’s kinda late to be wearing a housecoat, ain’t it? I guess you and Dylan had a late night.”
I hushed her and gestured toward the bedroom.
“Will you be quiet?” I whispered.
“Oh, my bad. I didn’t know he was here.” She sat down next to me on the sofa.
“He’s not here. Derrick is.”
“What? Get the hell outta here!” She went bug-eyed. “What happened? Big Momma told me you wanted to be with Dylan. Boy, is she gonna be disappointed!” She was trying to whisper, but she was about as quiet as a jet plane. I glared at her and reminded her to keep her damn voice down.
“Well, I did wanna be with Dylan-until last night.”
“Last night? What happened last night?” Now she looked even more confused.
“Steph, it was a mess. His ex-girlfriend showed up at his house.” I offered the shortest explanation possible, but of course my sister wanted all the details.
“Oh, no, she didn’t.” Stephanie leaned forward, waiting to hear more.
“Oh, yes, she did. We were just about to do our thing. I had the candles burning, I had just done my little striptease. Hell, he had the condom in his hand. And this chick has the nerve to knock on his door at two in the mornin’, tallcin’ ’bout she’s pregnant.” I rubbed my temples, wishing I could erase the humiliating image from my memory.
“Well, what he say? Did he believe her?”
“Hell, yeah, he believed her. He was jumpin’ around like it was the got-damn Fourth of July.”
“Oh, no, Jazz. I know you wanted to kick his ass.”
“Wanted to? Shit, he pissed me off so bad I slapped the hell outta him.”
“What? You oughta stop. You ain’t slap that man.”
“The hell I didn’t! You should’ve seen the way he kissed that heifer in front of me.”
“He kissed her? Damn, and here I am thinking he’s a nice guy.”
“That the problem, Steph. He is a nice guy,” I said quietly.
“You sound like you still care about him.”
“I do, as silly as that sounds.” Even though I could hear snoring from my bedroom, I whispered. Maybe if I spoke them quietly enough, these feelings would just go away.
“You really got hooked on that guy, didn’t you?”
“Look, I don’t feel like talking about Dylan right now, all right?” I pointed toward the bedroom, but it was just an excuse not to deal with my feelings.
“Okay,” she agreed. “I understand.”
“So what brings you over here, anyway? I thought it was your weekend to take Big Momma to church.”
“Oh, my God. I completely forgot. Big Momma’s outside in the van. She wanted me to make sure you were home.”
“What? Why’d you bring her over here? You know she can’t stand Derrick.”
“Hey, don’t be blaming this on me. Big Momma said something about you and Dylan was supposed to take her to Morrison’s for dinner tonight. Besides, I didn’t know Derrick was home.”
Of course, you know, three seconds later there was a knock on the door.
“Oh, shit! Now what am I gonna do?”
“You better answer the door before she starts knocking louder and wakes up Derrick. You know how Big Momma is.”
I did know how she was, so I got up and answered the door, hoping I could get rid of her before Derrick heard us and came out of the bedroom.
“Girl, why ain’t you dressed?” Big Momma bellowed. “I thought we were going to Morrison’s.”
“I’m sorry, Big Momma. I forgot all about it.”
“Well, I didn’t. I been thinkin’ about their banana pudding all day. Now, go on and get dressed.” She ambled past me and sat on the sofa next to Stephanie. “Where’s Dylan, anyway?”
“Oh, Big Momma he…” I glanced at the stairs, praying for some way out of this.
“He in the bedroom, ain’t he? That’s why you got your robe on at three o’clock in the afternoon.” Big Momma shook her head. “Lord, you young people sure work fast. Last week you were trying to tell me he was just your friend.” Stephanie laughed and I cut my eyes at her.
“He is just my friend, Big Momma. Look, I gotta tell y- ”
She cut me off again. “Then what’s he doing in your bed?”
“He’s not in my bedroom…”
“Baby, where’s the car keys?” All eyes turned in the direction of the voice. Derrick was walking down the stairs fully dressed. “Oh, excuse me. I didn’t know you had company.”
“Oh, Lord,” Big Momma mumbled under her breath to Stephanie. “What’s he doing here? I thought they sent him up the river.”
Stephanie shrugged in reply.
“And where’s Dylan?” Big Momma continued questioning Stephanie. I rushed to Derrick and gave him a hug, trying to keep some distance between him and my mumbling grandmother on the couch. I talked loud to drown out the questions she was asking Stephanie.
“Derrick,” I started nervously, “you remember Big Momma and my sister, Stephanie, don’t you?”
“Yeah. What’s up, Big Momma? How you doin’, Stephanie?” Derrick approached them, and Big Momma leaned back and glared at him. He did his best to ignore her dis and addressed my sister. “So, Stephanie, I hear congratulations are in order. A new baby, huh? What’s that make, two?”
“Yeah, a boy and a girl.” Stephanie smiled proudly.
“I’m happy for you. I can’t wait till me and your sister have some kids.” Derrick put a hand on my shoulder and joked, “We gonna have to hurry if we’re gonna catch up to her, boo. She’s gonna mess around and have a basketball team before we have one kid.”
“If you say so.” I tried not to grimace. I knew it was only a matter of time before Big Momma opened her mouth.
“How you gonna have kids and you ain’t even got no damn job? And selling those drugs just gonna wind you right back in that prison.”
“Big Momma, Derrick’s gonna go to college. He’s already got accepted to Virginia Union in the fall.”
“Oh, really? What’s you gonna do, Derrick? Start selling drugs to the college students? I guess that’s the next step in your plan to destroy black people.”
Derrick’s face became contorted. He looked like he was about to say something we might all regret. So I gently took his hand and spoke before he could.
“Derrick, didn’t you say that you wanted the car keys?”
“Yeah, I wanted to go see Tyler.” His eyes were still locked on Big Momma.
“Okay. Here they are.” I reached in my bag and handed him the keys.
“Why you gonna give him your car keys?” Big Momma asked. “He needs to buy his own car. When you gonna get your own car, anyway, Mister Big Shot?”
“When you gonna get the hell out my-”
I grabbed his arm. “No, Derrick, please don’t start no trouble,” I pleaded. “Big Momma don’t mean no harm. Go ’head and see Tyler.”
“Oh, I meant every word,” Big Momma spat. But thankfully, Derrick ignored her last insult and headed for the door, turning to me before opening it.
“Hey, baby, you wanna come with me?”
His invitation sounded sincere, and any other time I would have taken him up on it, because seeing Tyler meant seeing Wendy. Even though I trusted Derrick, I damn sure didn’t trust Wendy. This time, though, I was happy to see him go, especially since I was afraid he and Big Momma were gonna tear each other apart.
“No, you go ’head; we’re supposed to be going to Morrison’s for dinner.”
I breathed a huge sigh of relief once he walked out the door.