Vita smiled and patted her hand. "Just kidding," she said but thought to herself, I hope, and walked out to greet Betty Raye, who was still standing at the door. Vita was as smooth as silk and acted as if she were saying hello to just another acquaintance and not the wife of the man who had been the love of her life. "Governor Sparks, I'm sorry you had to wait but I was not dressed. Won't you come in?"
Betty Raye's knees were weak as she stepped into the living room. The entire apartment had a faint scent of Shalimar perfume, a familiar smell. Hamm always had the aroma on him.
"Have a seat, Governor. May I offer you coffee, tea?"
"Oh no, thank you. Just a glass of water, if you don't mind."
"Certainly. Bridget, would you please bring Governor Sparks a glass of water."
After they sat, Vita said, "I'm sure you know how sorry I am and all of us on the arts council are for your loss."
Betty Raye nodded. "Oh yes, and I appreciated your note and flowers."
There was an uncomfortable silence.
Betty looked around. "You have a beautiful apartment."
"Thank you." This was the first time the two women had seen each other since their brief meeting a few years ago, and Betty Raye found that she still felt like an awkward schoolgirl around Vita. Vita, now sitting across from her, wearing earrings made of two huge chunks of lime green crystal stones the same color as her eyes, was still one of the most glamorous women she had ever seen.
Vita was doing some observing of her own. She had seen plenty of pictures of Betty Raye, of course, and there were those few hurried seconds when they had met at the Wheeler party, but now that she had a chance to study her up close, it was a different thing. She saw a woman with nice enough features, nothing outstanding, but there was something about her eyes she had not noticed before. And she sat there wondering what it was. Her hands were long and graceful, her mouth generous in a way that saved a too thin face, but it was still her eyes that had caught Vita off guard again. She had not expected that.
When Bridget brought her a glass of water, Betty Raye took it and smiled and said, "Thank you."
Vita suddenly figured out what it was she saw in her eyes and where she had seen it before. Betty Raye's eyes had the same guileless look in them as a little female dog she had once had. There was a sweetness about them, mixed with sadness and something else, and all at once Vita realized that this woman was not going to shoot anybody. She was the one who was frightened. She told Bridget she could go and that she would call her if she needed her for anything else. The maid shot her an "Are you sure?" look and Vita nodded to reassure her.
They sat looking at each other. Finally Betty Raye spoke. "Mrs. Green, I thought I had a reason to come here but right now I can't remember what it was. I feel like a fool all I've done, I'm afraid, is to embarrass myself I thought you might need someone to talk to, someone who, well, I guess the thing I wondered about was if you were all right or if you needed anything. I know how fond you were of my husband and how fond he was of you… how much he depended on you… for advice and things. You were not at the memorial service and I think I know why." At that point Betty Raye hiccuped.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought how hard that must have been on you not to have" She hiccuped again. "Well, that's great. I've got the hiccups."
Vita stood up and took her glass. "Here, let me get you some more water," she said and went in the kitchen while Betty Raye sat on her couch, hiccuping. When Vita handed her the water, Betty Raye said apologetically, "Thank you," took a big sip, and spilled water down the front of her dress. "Oh dear, this is not how I planned this to be. I wanted" She hiccuped again. " I'm sorry. I just wanted to do what Hamm might have wanted someone to do."
Vita sat there and watched this woman fall totally apart right before her very eyes but there was nothing she could say. She still was not sure exactly how much she really knew. Betty Raye tried to continue.
"I thought that I was being noble or something but now that I'm here I realize I camd because I needed you to tell me some things." Then she burst into tears. "I think I need a friend and I don't know where to turn. Well, I better leave." She stood up. "I certainly did not mean to do this." When she reached the door she hiccuped again, said, "I'm so sorry," and went out and closed the door.
Vita sat there for a moment listening to Betty Raye hiccup down the hall, then got up and thought to herself, I'm probably going to regret this. She got to the elevator doors just as they opened and took Betty Raye by the arm. "Come back."
Betty Raye said, "No… I should just go and let you alone."
"I don't want you to go." Vita turned to the puzzled elevator operator standing there waiting and said, "She's not leaving."
Betty Raye said, "I'm not?"
"No, you're not, come on with me."
As Vita led her back up the stairs to the apartment, Betty Raye said, "I promise, I'm not really as dumb as I seem," and hiccuped again. When she got Betty Raye back inside Vita sat her down and handed her a glass of brandy. "Drink this."
Betty Raye took a drink and looked at Vita in horror. "What is that?"
"Brandy."
"Oh well, I thought I'd come here today because I wanted you to know if there was anything I could do for you and to tell you that you are welcome to see the boys anytime you want; I realize you must miss him terribly." She paused a moment, then said, "But I did have a question. Mrs. Green, I hate to ask you this, but I wondered: Do you have any idea what happened to him?"
"No, I don't, Mrs. Sparks. I wish I did. Believe me."
"Oh. I thought if anyone knew it would be you…"
Vita looked at her very carefully. "Did you know about your husband and me?"
"Oh yes."
"For how long?"
"From the beginning, I guess. Hamm was not the subtlest of men."
"And you never said anything?"
"No. But please don't think I'm a saint, I'm not. It nearly killed me. I cried over it, I prayed about it, but you can't make a person stop loving another person just by telling them to stop. If I had, he would have resented me the rest of his life. It was a problem with no solution or at least none I could think of. Oh, there was a time I thought about leaving him, and I should have, I guess. But I knew a divorce would have ruined his career, so I made the decision not to leave and I adjusted to it." She looked at the brandy glass. "I think this stuff has cured my hiccups. And of course I kidded myself that if I ran for governor for him he might have to depend on me. And I hoped that maybe one day he would get over you. But I think the real truth is I just didn't have the courage to leave. I'm not a very brave person, Mrs. Green, and the thought of having to go out on my own and raise the children alone…"
Betty Raye took another drink of the brandy and made another face.
"But there were times when I did wonder what you thought of me or if you ever thought of me or if you were trying to get him to leave me. Of course, when I met you and saw how beautiful and smart you were, I could understand why he fell in love with you. I couldn't blame him, really. I mean, you were everything I wasn't. I even wondered if you hated me for not leaving him…. Did you?"
Vita got up and walked across the room to the bar and fixed herself a strong drink and after a moment said, "No, I didn't hate you. The truth is that I never thought about you."
"I see," said Betty Raye.
"Now that I think back, it wasn't so much that I didn't care, it was just that I couldn't afford to think about you. I suppose if any woman having an affair with a married man ever really stopped to think about the man's wife and what it was doing to her, she would not be able to keep doing it. I didn't even have the excuse that most have that the wife is terrible. I knew you weren't terrible but what I didn't know was just how well you did understand him."
She came back over and sat down. "I think there are some things I do need to tell you. First of all, I never wanted to marry him. I am not the wife type and, believe me, I never wanted children. It's you that should hate me. I'm the thief. I stole what should have been yours. I had the best of him and just gave you what was left over."
Betty Raye smiled a little. "Well, in a way I feel I got the best of him. I have the boys. But the truth is, as much as he loved you and loved me… the children even… none of us ever really had him. Politics was his real love. We all came second to that."
Vita acquiesced. "Maybe you're right."
Betty Raye knew she should leave. There was really nothing more to say. But for some reason she just sat there, unable to move. She kept looking at Vita as if she did have something more to say but she did not know what it was.
Vita wondered what was the matter with her, just sitting there looking so troubled. And then a thought occurred. She leaned over, took Betty Raye's hand, and looked her in the eyes. "Mrs. Sparks, do you need help?"
A relieved Betty Raye grabbed her hand and blurted out, "Oh God, yes, yes, I do… I don't know what I am doing half the time or who to ask and without Hamm I'm scared to death. I know how smart you are and how much he depended on you. Oh, Mrs. Green, would you consider being my adviser?"
"First of all, it's Vita and I will be happy to help you in any way I can, Mrs. Sparks."
"Oh thank you, Vita and it's Betty Raye, please."
They stood up and Vita walked her to the door. "So when would you like to get together again? Lunch tomorrow, say around one?"