“Dad, I’m over here!” I shouted for the third time to the elderly man descending from the plane. After living in Taiwan for two years, my father returned to the United States in December 2006. I barely recognized him. He walked with a slow gait. His stilted movements revealed his lost strength. His facial expressions were very limited. I knew that something was very, very wrong.
As he came toward me, I fought back tears. The Chinese virtue of filial piety has been passed on to me, and I knew I would one day care for my parents, but I never dreamed it would come this quickly.
Later that evening, my suspicions were confirmed. He was very weak and it was not just from the plane ride. Suddenly, the roles were reversed. I became the parent, helping him to undress, bathe, brush his teeth, and get into bed.
The floodgate of tears opened as Dennis and I talked about the situation. My parents were now divorced. My mother was balancing work and college courses and barely had time for herself. The rest of our extended family was out of town. We had three young children under the age of four, including a month-old baby. Plus, we had recently received a mobilization notification. Again, the possibility of deployment, especially in the throes of the Iraq war, took my breath away.
Dennis and I immediately agreed my father would stay with us. Within a few weeks, the situation proved to be even more challenging. After a crash course in Medicare, secondary health insurance, and prescription drug coverage, along with a humongous number of visits to doctors, specialists, and labs. We heard the dreadful diagnosis Prostate Cancer. Not just cancer now, but my father also had Parkinson’s Disease.
Then, it happened. After several brushes with deployment, Dennis was mobilized in March 2007. A patriotic man, Dennis was eager to do his duty for our country, but I was not eager to see him go. The timing couldn’t have been worse, so it seemed.
I didn’t know how I was going to care for three children and my ailing father alone. After wrestling in my heart, I realized the best way to face the days ahead was to take them one day at a time, and most importantly, one prayer at time. Sometimes when it seems all we can do is pray, that is the best thing to do.
Thank you for family and for the opportunity to care for them no matter the circumstance.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” (Philippians 4:6)