I had never seen him look like that. Head down, hands in his pockets, lost in a world of his own. Our eyes met and we both knew this day was going to change who we were and what we were to each other.
It was September 11th and the whole world was changing. Buildings were falling. People were dying. America was gripped with fear. Our lives, like every American’s, suddenly changed. For my then-boyfriend, Joe, it meant the very high possibility of active military duty. For a young man in the National Guard we knew it would take a homeland attack to force him into full-time duty. That day our worst fear became reality. For the first time in our relationship a separation, due to activation, would most likely be inevitable.
Throughout the day people continually asked Joe, “Have you gotten a call? Heard you anything yet?” All I wanted was for people to go away and leave us alone. It was one of the hardest days in our relationship. I realized that if I was going to make a life with this man, the road ahead of us was not going to be easy or predictable. Suddenly, all the things we wanted from life didn’t matter. Tomorrow was questionable, our future was unsure, and our world and our security were being challenged.
We decided that day in the midst of all the horror, turmoil, and questions that we had each other, and we would face the world together. War was inevitable; that we both understood. Do we get married as we had been planning? Should we wait? How do we carry on in the face of an uncertain timeline? So many unanswered questioned were born that day. But one thing was for certain. We would choose to make it work. We chose to stay together. That day we committed to facing tomorrow together, even though tomorrow was so unsure. If God had called Joe to serve his country, and if God had brought us together, somehow he would see us through the unknown.
Lord, where there is shadow, there must be light. Help me focus on your light to help me walk through my valleys.
“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” (Psalm 23:4)