March 19, 2003, Iraqi Border. It was the first day of the invasion, and Navy SEAL Commander Mark Waddell was outfitted in his chemical suit and armed with chemical/biological/nuclear gear in anticipation of a possible chemical attack.
“You know,” he told another officer who was with him, “today is also my birthday…” The conversation stopped cold when the night sky lit up from a Marine Corps CH-46 helicopter exploding. The helicopter was carrying some British troops into combat, and they were all killed instantly.
“And that’s the way I started my birthday that year with the rocket that the Iraqis were shooting at us,” remembered Waddell. “They sounded like big jets flying over our heads, and chemical alarms were sounding, and it was very confusing in the fog of combat as we were attacking them.”
This was not the first time the twenty-year combat veteran had witnessed a violent end to human life, but it would prove to be the start of a year that would overwhelm him. “My life was full of seeing human tragedy,” he explained. “So in 2003 there was more human tragedy, there were more people killed, there were more uncertainties, there were more paradox situations that I had to deal with, and very intense emotional trauma. I was just full.”
Waddell and his wife, Marshele Carter Waddell, compare the experience to a scene in the film Titanic where a handful of men are arguing about whether the ship would sustain the blow or sink. “And then the engineer steps forwards and says, ‘If only three or four compartments had been affected, we would be okay. But it has spilled over into a fifth compartment, and she will sink.’ And that jumped out at me; that was my husband. Too many compartments had been affected and filled up, and therefore the weight was going to pull him down,” said Marshele.
Lord, when I begin sinking, lift me up with your mighty hand.
“O LORD, the God who saves me, day and night I cry out before you…. for my soul is full of trouble.” (Psalm 88:1, 3a)