March 26, 2003. It was the dead of night, but sleep was the furthest thing from my mind. The war in Iraq officially began just days ago, and my brigade and I were sitting at the airfield in Aviano, Italy, rigging up our rucksacks, preparing for a night jump. We were to open up the northern front.
It would be my first night jump. Rehearsing all the possibilities the next few hours held, I was scared out of my mind.
I suddenly remembered an elder from our church base saying once read Psalm 91, the soldier’s psalm. He was a Viet Nam veteran and had told us that this psalm had gotten him through the war.
So as I’m sitting on my rucksack, waiting for time to go by, I must have read Psalm 91 a hundred times. Verses five and six stated, “You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness…”
What does that mean to me? I wondered. Then it hit me. It seemed to tell me, Do not fear what you’re about it do, because you’re going to be the terror of the night, and when day comes, you will be the arrow that flies by day. So what do you have to fear?
After that, this unbelievable calmness came over me. It’s like God was sitting next to me saying, It’s going to be alright.
The previous ten jumps had always made me so nervous that I couldn’t eat beforehand, consequently I was quite weak. This time though, I was able to eat right before the jump, and I even slept on the plane. When it was almost time to jump, I saw in the faces of the men around me the fear that I once had. But now I had overwhelming confidence that God was going to be there no matter what. God laid his hand on me and I knew it. I didn’t see him, but he calmed my fears just like he calmed the Sea of Galilee with the disciples.
Lord, when I am afraid, calm my heart like you calmed the seas.
“He replied, ‘You of little faith, why are you so afraid?’ Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm.” (Matthew 8:26)