Dear Sir or Madam will you read my book?
It took me years to write, will you take a look?
Based on a novel by a man named Lear
And I need a job so I want to be a paperback writer, paperback writer.
It's the dirty story of a dirty man,
And his clinging wife doesn't understand.
His son is working for the Daily Mail,
It's a steady job, but he wants to be a paperback writer, paperback writer.
It's thousand pages, give or take a few.
I'll be writing more in a week or two.
I can make it longer if you like the stile,
I can change it 'round and I want to be a paperback writer, paperback writer.
It you really like it you can have the things,
It could make a million for you overnight.
If you must return it you can send it here,
But I need a break and I want to be a paperback writer, paperback writer.