Have you been good this year? Very, very good? Too bad.
Reality check: Santa doesn’t care if you’re naughty or nice. So you might as well have a little fun. And there’s still time.
New Year’s Eve 512 Red Rock Road 9 p.m. to dawn
Start your New Year off right-or, even better, very, very wrong.
– K
Adam locked the front door behind him and walked across the lawn to Harper’s house. He put his finger on the doorbell, but stopped, suddenly, before pressing down.
In all the years he’d known her, Harper had never been on time. She would never notice if he took a moment for himself, to think.
New Year’s Eve-and look how things had ended up, he thought, sitting down on the front stoop. Last year at this time, he and Beth had driven out to an empty spot in the desert-the same place that, months before, they’d shared their first kiss. They’d huddled together on a blanket spread out across the uneven ground, their faces flickering in candlelight. He had never wanted anyone so much-and never been so sure of anything. He’d believed in Beth, believed she was the last girl, the only girl, he’d ever want to be with. He would have done anything for her, he’d realized that night.
She’d destroyed all that-and he had thought he would never move on. That things would never be the same.
And they weren’t-they were better. Adam looked up at Harper’s window, wondering what she was doing, what she was thinking. He was thinking about her, and only her-and about the way her body had felt against his. There was no one to clap Adam on the back, to tell him job well done, but he beamed with pride nonetheless-after all, he’d proven to himself, to the world, that he was a real man. Had taken Harper in his arms and shown her how he really felt. How much he needed her-and discovered how much she needed him.
All the pain, all the resentment, all the anger he’d carried around with him these last several weeks-he was done with it, he decided. A real man didn’t need to hold a grudge. Didn’t need closure, or revenge. He resolved that, this year, he would treat himself to a fresh start. He would truly, finally move on, whatever it took. He was big enough to move on-maybe even, with the new strength Harper had given him, big enough to forgive and forget.
Forget it, Kane told himself, again. Just forget. Move on. It’s done.
But Adam’s jeering face kept swimming back into focus in his mind’s eye. Kane had exposed himself-and failed. And he didn’t like it.
Winning came easy to Kane. But then, he usually chose his contests well. After all, any game you couldn’t win wasn’t worth the effort. That was his first rule: Pick your battles, and pick them wisely. His second? It’s not over until you say it’s over-and Beth was a case in point. Adam thought he’d won, had sat back and enjoyed his illusion of victory, and only Kane had understood that the game was still afoot. He’d bided his time; then, when the moment was just right, had played his hand. And he’d won in the end, as usual. As always.
And that was it, Kane had finally realized. Adam couldn’t stand to lose. Too bad-who could? Was Kane supposed to restrain himself, refrain from pursuing his own desires, just because Adam wasn’t able to protect his own turf?
Not a chance. And with that, Kane felt the annoying tendrils of guilt release their tight grip around his neck. He’d done what was needed to win. And since life itself was nothing more than competition, how could that be wrong? Kane based all his actions on cool logic, on strategy-and it always led to victory. Let your emotions get involved, and things just got messy. This episode with Adam was proof enough of that.
No more, Kane resolved, ducking into a convenience store to pick up a few essential items for the big party. (Noisemakers, confetti, and condoms-after all, hope springs eternal.) Emotional attachment and clear thinking didn’t mix-and it was only by holding on to the latter that he could survive. Thrive.
As for Beth… he’d just have to be careful not to get too close. Kane had proven to himself, to her, to everyone, that he was the better man, that he could win her heart. Now he just needed to decide what he wanted to do with it.
What do you want? Beth asked herself, sitting down on the curb in front of her house, waiting for Kane to arrive. Better to wait outside, in the crisp, quiet night, than in the noisy, claustrophobic house, dodging nosy parents and sugar-crazed siblings. She needed her space. And time to think.
Last year, it had seemed like such an easy question. She wanted Adam. He wanted her. And for so long, they were happy.
The first words I heard this year were I love you, Beth thought in wonder. From Adam. He’d said it at midnight, and they’d greeted the New Year with a soft kiss that felt like it could last until spring. Everything began with him.
“I love you, too,” she had whispered, believing it to be true. But maybe she’d been wrong. Maybe Adam had just been easy. Safe. She’d never worried about what he really wanted, or why he wanted her around. She’d just accepted him, and everything he said-and look what had happened.
So maybe, just maybe, she was better off. Adam had cast her aside-but had she crumbled? Had she given up? Not Beth. Never. She’d moved forward, moved past Adam, found herself a new guy, a new life. And Kane wasn’t easy. He wasn’t safe. Life with him was a risk, every day a new challenge.
For so long she’d questioned that, wondered if it was a sign that she’d made the wrong decisions, that her life had run off the tracks. But now? Beth meant everything she’d said in her essay-truly wanted to be that person, someone who took chances, someone who embraced the new, the different, the difficult. And she finally knew she was strong enough to do it.
She’d proven to herself that she could handle anything-and so, she resolved, this year she’d put aside her doubts and her fear. She’d try to loosen the reins a bit and embrace uncertainty. Maybe her life was headed off the track she’d set for herself-and maybe she didn’t care.
I don’t care what he thinks of me, Miranda told herself, over and over again. He was just a guy from the Internet-she didn’t know him, might never see him again after tonight, so none of it really mattered. She had nothing to lose. So why was she short of breath, and so nervous she felt ready to pass out?
She hadn’t eaten anything all day. Could you lose weight just by skipping lunch and dinner? she wondered. It was too late to worry about that now, and definitely too late to try on yet another outfit in a desperate search for one that didn’t make her look frumpy. At any other party it wouldn’t have mattered. How many parties had she spent hours preparing for meeting Mr. Right only to spend her night trapped between Mr. Wrong and the punch bowl? But this party was different. Because this time, she knew Mr. Right would be there-and he’d be waiting for her.
ReadltAndWeep had forgiven her for standing him up and had agreed to try again. They would meet at 11:30 on Kaia’s back deck-and if things went well, Miranda might finally get her New Year’s Eve midnight kiss.
Miranda had read dozens of self-help articles, all promising that confidence was the key to attracting a mate. Believe you look good, they claimed, and he’ll believe it too. Take pride in yourself-and gain his undying respect and admiration.
This year, Miranda resolved, she was going to give it a try. Starting tonight.
I look great.
I am smart, funny, and fabulous.
Any guy would be lucky to have me.
The words rang empty in her ears, but she said them aloud, over and over again. Conviction through repetition. She hoped.
Every year on this night, with no one to turn to at the stroke of midnight, she vowed that next year would be different. Next year, she’d find the right person, someone who would live up to her standards-and, as an added bonus, notice that she was alive. Next year she wouldn’t be alone.
This is the year, she told herself with gritty determination, every January first.
Maybe this year, she’d finally been right.
Everything was right with the world. Finally. Adam loved her-he loved her. Harper couldn’t stop repeating the words to herself. She adored the way they sounded.
He loves me.
Tonight, they would be admired, envied, the center of attention-and why not? They were the perfect couple. Every girl at that party would wish she could take Harper’s place. But none of them ever would. Adam had made that clear-and Harper finally believed him.
She wrapped the glittery purple scarf around her neck-brand-new purchase, courtesy of Mom and Dad, though they didn’t know it-and applied one last layer of raspberry lip gloss. Adam was due any minute, and she was running late-it had taken her far too long to decide what to wear. But the perfect outfit was essential: Everyone who was anyone would be at Kaia’s tonight. Harper had seen to that.
A last-minute party wasn’t the easiest thing to pull off, but Harper had plenty of connections-and, fortunately, the town of Grace wasn’t about to offer much competition when it came to exciting nightlife. Even on New Year’s Eve.
Harper had been happy to help. These days, she was happy to do pretty much anything. Being in love could do that to you. And not only was she happier than she’d ever been, but for the first time, it was a happiness that didn’t depend on seeing others miserable.
Not completely, at least.
She slid on a pair of strappy silver heels that went perfectly with her silvery halter top, and checked herself out in the mirror.
I look hot, she thought approvingly. I look like the kind of girl who should be dating the hottest guy in town.
Officially, it was Kaia’s party, she supposed. But it would be Harper’s night. And, in a few more hours, the beginning of Harper’s year. She’d wasted so much time worrying that Adam didn’t want her, worrying that she should be a better person-screw that. Adam loved her just the way she was. He’d proven that much last night. And then again this afternoon. And Harper had proven to herself that she was every bit as incredible as she’d always thought.
It was New Year’s Eve, a time for resolutions, and this year, Harper had only one: No more second-guessing herself, no more feeling guilty about how she might have acted, regretful about what she might have done. She deserved everything she had-and she had it all.
They say you can’t have it all. But what did they know?
And what better way to celebrate her good fortune, Kaia decided, than to open her house to the peons and show off her remarkable house and her remarkable life?
She’d slipped into a dusty rose Miu Miu top, with deliciously expensive fabric and a plunging neckline, and paired it with a suede skirt she’d picked up at a Betsey Johnson sample sale last year. The color looked fabulous against her deep tan-which, she had to admit, was even better than the one she’d picked up last winter break, sipping Margaritas on a yacht off the coast of Turks and Caicos.
Too bad that, along with her perfect wardrobe and her perfect tan, she couldn’t show off her perfect man. Jack Powell was considered such a prize-Grace’s bachelor #1-it was a shame Kaia couldn’t broadcast their relationship to the world. Powell had his choice of any girl, any woman he wanted-and he wanted Kaia.
To think she’d almost let herself get distracted, by Reed, of all people. Pizza boy had something, that was clear. But it wasn’t anything she wanted. Not while she had a man like Jack Powell at her beck and call. Living in New York City had taught Kaia a few things, and she knew that you didn’t trade in your penthouse for a tenement. Firstclass apartments were hard to come by-almost as hard as first-class guys. Especially in a place like this.
Kaia and Jack Powell, together? That was a power couple, a pair who would turn heads.
Kaia and Reed Whoever? An image like that could only turn stomachs-starting with Kaia’s own.
So what if she found Reed intriguing, if her heart pounded a little faster, a little louder when he was around? All that was in the past-and, she resolved, it was going to stay that way. The New Year meant no more Reed. No more playing with fire-and no more digging through the trash.
Kaia was strict about her New Year’s resolutions, stricter than most-she usually lasted well into February.
This year, she lasted about five minutes. And then the doorbell rang.
She checked her watch-8:30-still far too early for even the most overeager of guests. And Kaia was pretty sure Harper wouldn’t have invited anyone clueless enough to even show up on time. Or did they not do fashionably late out here in hicksville?
She opened the door-and there he was, the same ratty T-shirt, the same smoldering eyes, and suddenly she was right back where she’d started.
On the brink of disaster.
“I heard you’re having a party,” Reed said by way of greeting. “My invitation must have gotten lost in the mail.”
“You weren’t-” Kaia cut herself off, torn between wanting to slam the door in his face and wanting to rip his clothes off. Telling him he purposely hadn’t been invited didn’t seem like the right move, but what if he wanted to stay? That could never be allowed. Your guest list defined you, and she refused to be known as the type of girl who invited-or even acknowledged the existence of-his type of guy.
“I don’t do parties,” he informed her.
She struggled not to look too relieved. On the other hand, she wasn’t quite ready for him to leave. And she definitely wasn’t ready for the realization that a part of her wanted to leave with him. “So why are you here?” she asked, trying to sound as if she didn’t care.
Which, she assured herself, she didn’t.
“I figured we’d start the New Year together,” he explained.
“It’s eight thirty,” she pointed out caustically.
“I thought you could just pretend,” he said, flashing a knowing grin. “You’re good at that.”
He pulled out a paper noisemaker and gave it a half-hearted toot. Then, tossing it aside, he pulled her into his arms.
“Happy New Year,” he whispered, his breath hot against her cheek, and then kissed her, sucking deeply on her lower lip, digging his hands into her flesh. She tore at him with urgency, at first, and then something shifted-the rough and raw energy between them softened, deepened. As his hands cupped her face, she opened her eyes, and he was watching her, his bottomless brown eyes only centimeters away. She could see herself reflected in them. She closed her eyes again and shut in the darkness, her world narrowed to the taste of his lips, the touch of his fingers, the sound of his breathing.
Happy New Year? She mused. Just maybe.