For telling us about global warming.
The world as we know it is coming to an end. By the year 2023, all ocean water will have boiled away. Al Gore tells similarly shocking information regarding global warming in his painfully revealing movie An Inconvenient Truth. If you haven’t seen it, don’t. Your time will be better spent building a fallout shelter for when the sky starts raining lava. If you hurry, you might just make it.
History tells us, “Don’t shoot the messenger.” But you kind of have to in this case. It’s not like he was handed a letter and read it; he actually did the research and uncovered the facts about global warming. Thanks a lot, Al; it’s your fault we can now fry an egg on the polar ice caps.
Quite frankly, this global warming business isn’t the only way you ruined it for everyone. You could have pushed a LITTLE harder in the 2000 presidential election recount! You could have also made your energy-guzzling home a bit more efficient (it uses about twenty times more energy than the average home and it’s only four times bigger).
And by the way… no, you did NOT invent the Internet.